Peiyang
Peiyang

自由的內在探險家。2019年底離職,決定休業一年,放慢人生節奏,把這段日子的經歷寫成《休業日記》,連載中。

Closure Diary 7: After the hustle and bustle, the beginning of the closure

Remember the original intention of the road? Half-year review

Photo by Brannon Naito on Unsplash

Not long ago, I left my original workplace for some reasons and embarked on a journey of layoff. Now, half a year later, do you still remember the original intention of going on the road? How does it relate to what you are doing now? How do you view the relationship between them?

Socrates famously said, "The unexamined life is not worth living." I am glad that I kept a diary of my leave of absence, and now I can review them one by one.


Original intention x departure

Remember the original intention of the road?

Although there is no direct disclosure, I can see some clues from the achievements I record every month. Thanks to the monthly off-duty diary that keeps reminding me of its existence and how far I am from my goal. After all, during the journey, it is really easy to be attracted by the scenery along the way, get lost on the road, and cannot reach the distance.

After the active exploration and development in the first half of the year, many keywords leaped into my life, which once shook me. I got acquainted with natural architecture and began to want to create. Going to the countryside to work and change accommodation has satisfied the desire for self-sufficiency, and the food that I want to eat in the future also comes from my own land. If you want to raise chickens, chickens can bring a lot and are good friends for farmers. Seeing life in the mountains also makes me want to live in seclusion...

In fact, it doesn't matter if the goal changes because of this, the destination can be adjusted at any time - as long as the decision responds to your own heart, not the external world. When in doubt, I often examine my current craving and try to satisfy it by asking myself, "If my life was about to end, what would I most regret not doing right now?"

The original intention has not changed, it is still the No. 1 pick that I most want to achieve.


hit the road x accident

What is the relationship between what you are doing now and your original intention? How do you view the relationship between them?

Taking half a year as the dividing line, the experience in the first half of the year has nothing to do with what I want to do, it is more like avoiding the purpose of taking a break from work. There is no way, because I am too wasteful, I quit my job and feel worthless, and I have time but can't make good use of it. At that time, I just wanted to meet other people who are also not at work to warm each other. Unexpectedly, it opened my mind and eyes, and I have had a meeting with some souls since then.

Life is easy when there are people to pass the time with and things are arranged. Just follow the flow (the crowd), give yourself out as naturally as you breathe, open your heart, and embrace everything. Whether it's fun or not, boredom or fun, it's shared by someone. When you are left alone, the responsibility for satisfying yourself all falls back to you, and you can no longer easily shirk.


I like traveling without over-planning, so is taking a break from work, as long as there is a destination or general direction to hit the road. There is no limit to how to arrive, stay flexible, embrace all surprises, and add a little curiosity to achieve the scenery in front of you . This is also the best state of my life.

The perfect plan is efficient, automatically eliminating irrelevant things, bypassing long roads, avoiding everything that doesn't make sense or help, reducing surprises (both good and bad), and reducing risk. Under such standards, I can say that I wasted my time in the first half of the year.

 Haven't you heard? At first glance, the meaningful things in life are mostly white labor. ” — Kotaro Isaka, "Oh! Father"

Seemingly farther and farther from the goal, it adds breadth to the journey. From the days when I was working as a freelancer at first glance, I gained a unique life experience that helped me walk with more certainty, which is the best gift on the way to quit my job.

After ending the nomadic mode in the first half of the year, I chose to return to a person's life in the second half of the year.

When you're alone, the test really begins. After the hustle and bustle, you will eventually return to a person's loneliness, face yourself in loneliness, and learn not to dodge your own life.

journey x to be continued

Photo by Kyle Cottrell on Unsplash

San Mao once said: "A person has at least one dream, and there is a reason to be strong. If the heart has no place to rest, it will be wandering everywhere." If you don't face yourself honestly, leaving the workplace is just a change from one identity to another. One identity to escape, put on a different coat, hide in another name to go to comfort. If you can respond to your own heart, you will know that the current wandering is only on the road, and there is a heart that can be placed in the distant place.

In the end, the eyes of life should be put back on oneself, listen to the voice of the body, feel the inner message, learn to take care of and satisfy one's own needs, and try to achieve oneself in this life.


Achievement of the month (2020/05)

  • Illustrations: 17. Find some ways to calm yourself down and create.
  • Music: Completion of self-composed song [gentlely] 🎵
A piece of music that took five months to complete
 【Gentle】The reason for creation (excerpted from personal Facebook)
"If life is about to end, I want to leave ________ at the end"
More than half a year ago, I often thought about this issue because of health factors. Later, I thought, for myself, I want to leave a life without regrets. So I embarked on a leave of absence, ready to fulfill my unfinished dream. For those around me, all I want to leave behind is this song, and its final sound. I want to dedicate it to the people who appear in my life, whether it is short or long, it is a precious scenery 💗
  • Articles: 1 (Discontinued Diary 6: Relocating myself)
  • Reading: "The Tracker: The Pursuit of the Young Pine Forest", "The Unbearable Lightness of Life", "Reverse Thinking Like an Artist"
  • Number of days at home: 17 days
  • After three exams, I finally got a motorcycle driver's license😭
  • ground bark
  • Woven Water Bottle Bag
  • Sort out the incense that floods the balcony and make it into handmade soap
  • Swimming in Waimu Mountain and Sea
  • Take the Shikahoribira Trail

"Retirement Diary" is a diary that I started serializing after I left my job at the age of 30, one piece per month. Interested can follow : Facebook  Instagram  Medium  

CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

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