try to live

One Sunday afternoon, I attended a reading sharing session. The lecturer introduced Kenji Miyazawa's work "Night of the Galaxy Railway". When introducing Miyazawa's life, I thought of another Japanese writer I love very much - Tatsuo Hori.

Hori Tatsuo was born in the late Meiji era, spanning the eras of the three emperors of the Taisho and Showa eras. In middle school, Chen Xiong, who originally studied science and liked mathematics, has been exposed to literature since high school, and has since embarked on the road of literary writing and began to try to create. In early 1923, he met Shisheng Shixing (one of the three writers of Kanazawa) under the help of the middle school principal. After that, Muro was introduced to Akutagawa Ryunosuke, and he worshipped him as a teacher. Since then, he has officially entered the literary world.

At that time, Akutagawa Ryunosuke lived in Karuizawa, so Tatsuo often visited and communicated with other literati. It's just that he was frail and had to take a year off from school to recuperate due to tuberculosis. At the age of 21, he graduated from high school and was admitted to the Department of Japanese Literature at Tokyo Imperial University. During the summer vacation, he stayed in Karuizawa, and later founded a literary magazine with friends. However, Akutagawa Ryunosuke committed suicide, and Hori Tatsuo was hit again (previously, his mother was hit hard by the unfortunate death of the Tokyo earthquake). This blow even affected his future creative style.

However, as an apprentice of Akutagawa, he continued to participate in the editing work of "The Complete Works of Akutagawa Ryunosuke", and also obtained his degree with "Akutagawa Ryunosuke" as his graduation thesis.

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The Japanese nobles of that era seemed to be weak people, both physically and mentally. For example, Osamu Dazai and Ryunosuke Akutagawa chose to commit suicide to end themselves, especially Osamu Dazai, who committed suicide five times before "successful". Other writers are seriously ill, such as Natsume Soseki died of gastric ulcer; Masaoka Shiki (formerly known as Masaoka Shiki) and Miyazawa Kenji died of tuberculosis (that is, tuberculosis). One of the symptoms of tuberculosis is coughing up blood. Yes, just like the Cantonese fragment, the male/female protagonist holds a white handkerchief, coughs suddenly, and vomits blood. When I got tuberculosis, it was like a terminal illness, and it was difficult to cure. That is partly because of the medical level, and the BCG vaccine was not invented until 1921.

Perhaps the pain makes Wenhao's works more moving. After Masaoka coughed up blood, it reminded him of the story of the cuckoo crying blood, so he changed his name to "Ziki" and worked hard to create haiku until his death at the age of 34. Although he was ill, he was a hot-blooded man and always liked to play baseball. At the age of 23, he wrote the following haiku:

Spring breeze や ま り を cast
(Translation - Spring breeze, I really want to pitch in this grassland)

This haiku was written after he got sick. I can imagine that he, who can only watch the game outside the stadium, must really want to step into the stadium area.

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Shiki continued to create in the face of his illness, and so did Hori Tatsuo. After the teacher committed suicide, Chen Xiong created a book "Holy Family" based on the teacher, his wife and their daughter. The writings are very popular. However, Chenxiong coughed up blood when he was not writing, and had to rest at home. At this time, he began to read Proust's "Reminiscence of the Years Like Water".

However, his illness did not improve, so he was admitted to the Highland Sanatorium in Fujimi, Nagano Prefecture, for several months of treatment. During this period, Tatsuo continued to be nourished by Proust, James Joyce, and European literature, and consolidated his literary foundation.

While he was resting in Karuizawa, he met Ayako Yano, a young girl who painted oil paintings. The two began to fall in love like this, and the years of convalescence together. This is "Summer" published by Chen Xiong in "Literary Spring and Autumn". The "girl with a thin and tall figure wearing a yellow straw hat" who appeared in the work is based on Ayako.

After reading this, I believe you will feel deja vu. Yes, Ayako is Nahoko Satomi, the heroine of Hayao Miyazaki's work "The Wind Rises".

The two actually reached the engagement stage, but Ayako's tuberculosis condition worsened again, and Chenxiong was not in good health, so the two went to the plateau sanatorium in Fujimi together. Unfortunately, Ayako eventually passed away, leaving Chenxiong alone.

Chenxiong will be with Ayako later, and he will start writing his famous book "The Wind Rises". The work took about a year to complete.

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"The Wind Rises" has five chapters - "Overture", "Spring", "The Wind Rises", "Winter" and "Valley of the Shadow of Death". The story begins with "I" meeting Setsuko and getting engaged. However, Setsuko's tuberculosis condition is repeated, and "I" and Setsuko have to consider whether to send Setsuko to a sanatorium for treatment. When Setsuko decided to go to a nursing home for treatment, it was like this:

"Why have I become so timid recently? In the past, no matter how sick I was, it didn't matter to me, but..." Her voice was small, as if she was talking to herself, and she stopped talking halfway through. The long silence that followed made the unspoken words worrying. After a while, she suddenly raised her head and glanced at me, lowered her head again, raised her voice and said, "I suddenly want to live well..."
Then she added in a barely audible voice: "Because of you..." (p. 37)

Their life in the nursing home will make you feel romantic and good times:

In the meantime, as if to save the previously delayed journey, the season suddenly accelerated in those days. Spring and summer seem to come at the same time suddenly. Every morning we are woken up by the call of a warbler or a cuckoo, and almost all day, the fresh green of the surrounding woods surrounds the nursing home and even renders the interior of the ward a crisp green. Every day is chasing after the previous day. The clouds that emerge from the mountains in the morning seem to return to the original mountains in the evening.
Since every day is similar, every day is beautiful and monotonous, when I try to remember the first days we were together, and the days when I was caring for Setsuko, I could hardly tell which came first, Which is the latter.
It could even be said that we have been freed from time while the likes continue to advance each day. And, in these timeless days, every little thing in life has a different charm than before. The warm, fragrant woman by my side, her slightly short breaths, the soft hands that held me, her smile, the ordinary conversations that happened between us—there was nothing else in the monotonous days. something else. But I am convinced that what we call life is actually made up of these things, and that we are satisfied with these trifles only because I am with her. (pages 53-54)

"Me" and Setsuko's life in the sanatorium, although both parties felt a little fortunate, "I" actually felt very uneasy:

I started to recall everything that happened to us, some fleeting, some stuck somewhere, no day forward. Although I am far away from Setsuko now, I have been talking to her and hearing her answers during this period. Our story, like life itself, has no end. The story seemed to come to life at one point, leaving me to unfold, even throwing me, who was often stuck somewhere, to make up the sad death of the sick mistress, as if that was the result it wanted— Foreseeing her own death, but trying to live happily and gracefully. Every woman lying in the arms of her lover, sad for the lover who remains in the world, and at the same time dying happily - such a woman's picture clearly appeared in front of my eyes. "Men try to make their love purer, persuading sick women to join them in a sanatorium in the mountains. But when death threatens them, men become more and more suspicious: even if they get exactly what they want Can you really be satisfied with the happiness of the man? But the woman, at the end of her pain, thanked the man for his sincere care for her, and died with a satisfied smile. Later, with the help of the graceful deceased, the man finally began to believe in the two The little happiness between..."
The ending of such a story seems to have been waiting for me there. Immediately, the image of the woman dying pierced my heart violently. I woke up suddenly from the fantasy, an inexplicable fear and shame flooded my heart, and as if trying to get rid of the fantasy quickly, I stood up abruptly from the bare root of the beech. (pages 81-82)

"I" was affected by such thoughts, and had to ask Setsuko, "Are you satisfied with your current life?" Setsuko was asked by "I":

"I always suspect that our current life is caused by my willfulness, that I impose on you what I think is important..."
"I don't want you to say that," she interrupted me abruptly. "It's just wayward for you to say that."
Even if she said that, I'm still not satisfied. She stared at my depressed look, and finally said, unable to bear it any longer:
"Don't you know that I'm satisfied with my life here? No matter how bad my health is, I never once wanted to go home. What would I be like without you by my side? I don't dare to think. You weren't there just now, I I also endured and comforted myself that the later you came back, the more joy I would see you. However, the time when I thought you should have come back, you didn't come back, I was worried, we stayed every day The room we were together suddenly turned into an unfamiliar space, and I wanted to run out of the space that scared me... But I immediately remembered something you said to me before, and my mood finally calmed down. You told me this before Right? How wonderful it would be if we thought about our present life after a long, long time..."
Her voice gradually became hoarse. After she finished speaking, she pursed her lips and looked at me intently.
Hearing her words, I was very sad, but as if afraid that she could see through my inner excitement, I walked to the terrace. I looked at the scenery of this area meaningfully from the terrace - just like the first glass evening when we once completely described the happiness of the two of us together, but there were more autumn afternoon sunshine that was completely different from that time, and a clearer and brighter evening. Cold more meaningful light. At the same time, a similar happiness, but more heart-wrenching, unfamiliar excitement, and the accompanying sadness... (pp. 85-86)

Happiness makes people feel heartbroken, sweetness but sadness, these two extreme feelings shroud the whole work.

It is very strange, how can such a bridge have a romantic and poignant interpretation? In "The Origin of Modern Japanese Literature", Kakuto Karatani has this understanding in Chapter 4 "The Significance of Disease":

The prodigal son's appearance and body shape are typical of romanticism. It is often pointed out that the romantics are linked to tuberculosis, and Susan. Susan Sontag (1933-2004)'s Metaphors of Disease, Tuberculosis in Western Europe in the mid-eighteenth century, has acquired romantic associations. When the myth of tuberculosis is widely spread, for those who are striving for status, or who have risen from the lower ranks of society and entered the upper class, tuberculosis is a symbol of nobility, as well as an indicator of delicacy and rich sensibility. Shelley, who was suffering from tuberculosis, wrote to Keats, who had the same disease: "This fellow with lung disease, especially likes people like you who can write good poetry." At the same time, the nobles no longer pursued power, but instead pursued image The appearance of tuberculosis patients has also become a new model for the appearance of aristocrats. (page 192)

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In the fourth chapter, "Winter", the author uses a diary to record the remaining time of Setsuko and "me". During this time, Setsuko's condition deteriorated, and "I" was taking care of Setsuko on the one hand, and at the same time writing about his happy time with Setsuko. For "I", this period of time was a time of anxiety and was unable to enter the state of writing:

I threw the nearly finished draft on the table and didn't touch it. I politely told the patient that in order to complete the manuscript, it would be better for us to live separately for a while.
However, how can I enter the state of writing and how can I describe our once happy life? That is impossible. (page 108)

The author used many obscure scenes, such as the sound of chestnuts falling, moths dying on paper, and mountains surrounded by snow, to express "I"'s unease, fear, and fear of losing Setsuko. Although there is Setsuko beside "I" in the house, the chill of the north wind blowing up the heavy snow is transmitted to the reader's heart through the text. The death of the moth on the paper made "me" feel inexplicably frightened, but it appeared to have nothing to do with him, making it seem like he was escaping from facing reality.

Ultimately, Setsuko decides not to stay in the nursing home, and longs to go home. "I" is overwhelmed like a child, which makes people sad:

The high forehead, the peaceful eyes, the clenched lips—everything was the same as usual, even more inviolable than usual. Instead, I felt like a child, and I was so scared when nothing happened. Then, I suddenly felt weak, knelt down in front of the bed with a thud, buried my head deeply into the edge of the bed, pressed my face tightly against the edge of the bed, and didn't move for a long time. The patient's hand is gently stroking my hair... (page 114)

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The last chapter, "The Valley of the Shadow of Death" ("Death の か げ の Valley"), continues to be written in a diary, but it is a year and a half later. Setsuko has passed away. And "I" returned to the old place again. To outsiders, the valley of this village is called "Valley of Happiness", but to "I", the name of this valley has been changed to "Valley of the Shadow of Death".

"I" tried to find spiritual comfort, but it was a blizzard at the time, and "I" was eager to retrieve the memories at that time:

Just when I thought I had heard it wrong, the dead grass, dead trees and sky in the area in front of me suddenly changed back to the nostalgic summer look in my heart, a little bit alive...
Almost at the same time, I also realized the fact that everything I had in this village that summer three years ago is now nothing. (page 124)

After living here for a whole month, "I" finally came to this conclusion:

It was a very quiet night. Tonight, too, I let my thoughts fly.
"I don't seem to be happier than the average person, and I'm not unhappy. The so-called happiness that people used to make us so anxious, and now can be forgotten at any time. On the contrary, perhaps my current state is closer to a kind of happiness. Or, It can also be said that recently my mood is similar to happiness but a little more sad than happiness. But I am not unhappy. I can live as if nothing has happened, maybe because I try not to communicate with people and live Life in isolation. It's all thanks to you that someone like me who doesn't have much active action can do this. But, Setsuko, I never blame you for my lonely life now. I just do it for myself I love everything I like, maybe, although it's all for you, but I'm so used to thinking that I'm not worthy of your love for me, that everything I do is for myself. You are like that and nothing else All you want, love me with all your heart..." (pp. 138-139)

"I" suddenly realized something and understood why this place was called the Valley of Happiness. And "I", because I am accustomed to living here, can also call this valley the Happy Valley just like others.

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The title of "The Wind Rises" comes from Paul. A line from Paul Valéry's "The Graveyard by the Sea" -

Le vent se lève, il faut tenter de vivre.
The wind is blowing, try to survive.

As I said before, Chen Xiong used his life with Ayako as the theme of "The Wind Rises". Therefore, when reading, it is not surprising that the two of them will be substituted. In the last chapter, Chenxiong tried to organize his memories with Ayako, and say goodbye to his beloved Ayako. Although Valery's verse does not appear at the end of the final chapter, as in the film's end credits, the words are already expressed.

According to the information, the last chapter Chenxiong was completed in Kawabata Yasunari's other village.

Two months after writing, Chenxiong coughed up blood again and needed to be admitted to the hospital.

You can imagine how he burned himself and exhausted his physical and mental energy to complete this work.

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Hori Tatsuo's works are seen again (at least for the Chinese to read), and they must be related to Hayao Miyazaki. During the interview, Hayao Miyazaki expressed his love for Tatsuo's works because he felt the same way:

I like Hori Tatsuo's works very much, because he is in such a depressing era, and he is sick and weak, but he still wants to engage in literary creation. There must be many endless helplessness. The feeling of completeness is very important; just as in "Beautiful Village", the protagonist walks endlessly near his accommodation, thinking about things while walking, and the sights he sees are contrasted with his memory, appearing endlessly. The feeling of loneliness, that is the feeling I have myself, like whenever I grope for the creation, hesitating, there will be that kind of endless feeling, and sometimes this kind of atmosphere will appear when traveling. , I really like the delicate description of this emotion in "Beautiful Village".

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Back to Miyazawa's "Night on the Galactic Railroad". The protagonist Giovanni's definition of happiness is to seek happiness for others, and you will feel happy yourself, which is a kind of "I am for everyone" spirit. This spirit can be seen in Miyazawa's life - he studied agriculture, instructed farmers in farming, ran for the farmers' lives, and finally fell ill.

What about Chenxiong? Happiness may be to be able to live hard and bravely. Shortly after Chenxiong completed the work, he married Kato Tae under the introduction of his friend Ryosei Muro. Continue to write after marriage. In 1941, he completed his first full-length work "Nasuoko". But the illness never let him go. He coughed up blood all the time, and finally passed away in 1953, ending his 48-year life. Kawabata Yasushi, as his funeral chairman. His ashes are buried in Tokyo's Tama Cemetery.

His life is like that verse: "Le vent se lève, il faut tenter de vivre".

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Extended information:

"The Wind Rises" (from the blog):
https://www.books.com.tw/products/0010599124?sloc=main

Dong Qizhang: A Bread-Eating Story - Proust's "Reminiscence of the Years Like Water"｜Can't read back #14: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9Gnzp-GlkL4

"Seaside Cemetery" French/English: https://web.archive.org/web/20171223103246/http://unix.cc.wmich.edu/~cooneys/poems/fr/valery.daylewis.html

Character Interview/Feng Qi Hearing the inner voice of Hayao Miyazaki (Part 1):
https://tw.news.yahoo.com/Character Interview/The Wind Rises-Listen to the inner voice of Hayao Miyazaki-040127364.html