小番薯星球
小番薯星球

在此連載第一本處女作《一路走到世界盡頭-一個女孩的朝聖之路To The End of The World-A Girl’s Pilgrimage》關於我徒步西班牙朝聖之路的精采故事。 我是小番薯,17歲開始獨自旅行,20歲走過西班牙朝聖之路後從此愛上西班牙,也在那邊念了碩士學位,從此結下了深深的緣分。 IG: @hanji_photography 臉書: @dreamwithhappy

Put yourself in the right place: come on stage again and make me fall in love with myself again

To be on stage again, let me find my worth, my energy, my influence and my ebullient me. The fire that was supposed to be extinguished was lit again.

I honestly feel that when there is only work left to do for money, it is like a chronic suicide.

To be honest, I seriously doubted whether I had bipolar disorder a while ago, and the mood swings were big enough, but this symptom only happened when I went to work in the company. He even quarreled with the store manager, and then quarreled with his family far away in Yunlin on the phone. At that time, in order to help the last client to realize his house selling plan, I continued to stay in Xinyi Housing, but for some reason, the house could not be sold for the time being, and then he did not want to buy a house. So what's the point of me staying here? The assistant persuaded me to get the year-end bonus before leaving, otherwise my efforts this year would be in vain (meaning giving it to the company in vain). So I was persuaded, and all my friends and family around me told me to hold on until the end of the year before leaving. But I have already signed up for the scriptwriting class, the fasting camp, and the stewed rice and kicks that I agreed with my friends. If I continue to stay here, my days will definitely be full, there is no room to breathe, and I feel like my life and myself will explode !

"I got it in just over two months, and it's over after a while!" This is what the whole world told me. But most of the time now, I find that I have no motivation. This is not my place. I feel that most of the time, I am here as if I don't exist. Why should I force myself to stay? Going down? That feeling is so suffocating, I feel like I'm about to disappear from this world, I feel that everyone here is about to have enough of my negative energy, and even I am about to have enough of myself! Because I need to retreat and stay away from the crowd I force myself to touch the crowd when it’s time for me, and if I go on like this, I’m going to lose myself!

So just yesterday, the store manager saw that I had a problem and came to me for an interview, and asked me what was wrong. During the conversation, he already knew that I was only working for the year-end bonus, which was very painful. So he gave me three options:

1. Change your work attitude and keep doing it.

2. Continue the current state and leave after the end of the year.

3. Resign.

He gave me a day to think and give him answers before leaving get off work.

In the afternoon, another client happened to take me to Yilan to help his store hang advertising signs, so we took it as a half-day tour, and I just had time to think about it.

My fear and hesitation are simply because of "money". I feel that the end of the year is what I deserve and can't give it to the company in vain.

So when I was on the way back, I also talked to my client, and of course he respected my decision and idea.

I decided to leave now. Because I was about to leave, I really don't know why I'm still here?

It's a complete answer to the "Who am I? Where am I?"

And this situation is completely opposite to when I was invited to give lectures and Spanish stew at the Cultural University the day before yesterday.

When I was on stage, it was as if I had been enchanted, and my soul seemed to be summoned back in an instant. That belongs to my soul and energy. I enjoy myself telling stories on stage, I love myself who brings strength and courage to my audience, I love myself like this!

I think, I finally fell in love with myself again, and found myself. It's me who tells stories on stage and who brings energy to everyone. After leaving the stage, I can also hear the moving feedback from the students~! I am really happy!

Talking about my adventures and taking everyone to cook a pot of paella, I think this is the best job in the world for me!

It is really relaxing to describe the recent thoughts and some important things that happened in words. This is also the best thing in the world!

In short, put yourself in the wrong place, prepare to be overwhelmed, put yourself in the right place, and you can shine and illuminate others!

Like self-actualization at the top of Marx's pyramid!

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