Book review·Book review｜A close reading of "Chinese Shadows" Part 2: "Survival"

In the last article, I mentioned that "Chinese Shadows" was a second-hand book that I bought all the way from afar. Therefore, the second detailed reading is about the story of the second-hand book, which is also the story of a Christmas gift. It is a story rather than a series of guesses, which are filled with my own emotions.

It was a long wait after I decided to buy "Chinese Shadows" from the second-hand book market. I am very happy to buy a book in very good condition. The seller said it is almost new, a 1978 Penguin paperback. I have always wondered why such a valuable book is no longer in print and reprinted. After reading the content, is it really because of Simon Leys's meticulous writing?

I was originally happy when I got the book. I saw the 👆 cover and yellowing pages. The people riding bicycles on the cover looked so familiar to the past! However, when I opened the book cover, I saw words like 👇.

 Christmas 1979,
To Ric——
To the miraculous love that understands existence,
dad

I stared at this page for a while, and after I came to my senses, I asked my husband to read it, which also confirmed once again that I had read the handwriting on the title page correctly. Opening the pages, I looked for other notes, annotations, and bookmarks that could help me understand more about the book, but I found nothing. So I returned to the words on the title page again, and a surge of sadness surged through me, almost unstoppable.

The book in my hand was bought by a father in 1979 as a Christmas gift for his son, named Ric. This father was the first person to handle this book. I tried to imagine this father picking out this book about China and the Cultural Revolution from the dazzling array of books in the bookstore. When he held the book in his hands, he thought that this book could be given to his son as a Christmas gift. . That was 1979! Does this father always pay attention to the distant east? Is he a New Leftist? That’s why I became interested in books about China and the Cultural Revolution. Or does he just know that his son has always liked stories about the far east? I don't know.

However, what can be sensed is that this father knew a lot about China at that time, just because of his word "survival". Perhaps he had already glanced at the book quickly in his hands? Perhaps he is familiar with sinologist Simon Leys? Is this father himself an academic? At least he is an intellectual! The intellectuals of the 1979s would no longer risk their lives in China.

Whether the father is doing what his son wants, or the father wants to teach his children about the miracle of survival through this book, it seems that this book is the only one that has truly survived over the years. If his son in 1979 could already read this book, Ric would be in his fifties or sixties now. Who actually sold this book? If it's Ric himself, is it because he didn't like the book, or did Ric also pass away, so future generations dealt with the book? Still unknown.

This summer, the old lady living upstairs suddenly could no longer take care of herself. She also had no children, so the niece or niece dealt with the remaining things in her apartment after she was sent to a nursing home. Knowing that we are a young family, we were specifically asked to go upstairs to see if we could take away anything we liked or needed, otherwise they would have to throw everything away when the moving company came. In addition to many tools, we also brought a set of orchid white porcelain. The old lady’s niece/niece said it was a set of porcelain from the Netherlands. I didn’t think much about it and thought it would be a pity to throw it away, so I packed it all back in a basket. . After returning home, I discovered by chance that the porcelain covered in smoke and tar was the famous Deft porcelain from the Netherlands.

The book in my hand now gives me the same feeling as before, because things changed and my son Ric or his children sold the book, so it came into my hands. The yellowed pages of the book took me back to Christmas in 1979, which happened to be the same time as now. When Ric opened the gift, was he happy or disappointed? In an earlier article, I wrote, "I grew up in college." However, I envy Ric so much because I have never received a book as a gift from my father, and there are also the words on the title page. Inscription: Although he loved calligraphy, he never gave me a book and he always cherished words like gold. When I got married, I bought a card myself and gave the blank card to my parents, asking them to write some words for me. In fact, this was also my expectation. When I finally opened it, I saw that there were only four words in the middle of Nuo Da's card, "Happy New Marriage". Perhaps these four words, which can be given to anyone, should make me realize that some hopes are always just extravagant hopes. My mother also has many books, but she only gave me one book. It was Wu Xiaoli's "Foot Sound" very early on, and I bought a lot of it. I have always felt that growing up in a so-called scholarly family should not be like this. Therefore, on the title page of every book I buy for myself, I write the date, place, why I bought this book, etc. just like this father. This is my own compensation for myself. It's a pity that even if you make up for some things by yourself, you can't make up for the shortcomings caused by your parents. It's funny and sad to think about. I thought that people in college are book lovers, and their children are naturally immersed in the world of books. Well, yes or no.

So, holding this book and looking at the handwriting that was about to fade, I realized that I may never receive such a simple but warm gift from my father in my life. I have never received it, so why lose it?

Sure enough, hope is like a bat flapping its wings in the dark, only to hit its head and bleed bloody on the gray wall.

I hesitated for a long time whether to take notes and highlight the parts while reading this book carefully. In the end, I decided to treat it as my own book and write whatever I want. If one day this book flows from my hands into the hands of another person, it would be great if it can add more conjectures to him or her.

Christmas is approaching, but my "Christmas Gift" article is not so joyful, but rather responds to the ups and downs I've been feeling recently. After this article, I will continue to write "Reading Chinese Shadows" and will also share more year-end moods❤️, so stay tuned. 😄