365 Days Listening Book 231-237 (Attachment: The Crooked Neck Tree on the Primary School Playground)

Saturday, August 20 "Front and Profile of Zeng Guofan"

Sunday, August 21 "Antifragile"

Monday, August 22 A Brief History of the Human Body

Tuesday, August 23 "Black Swan"

Survival and Destiny Wednesday, August 24

As You Like It Thursday, August 25

"Youth" Friday, August 26

1

Let’s talk about Black Swan first.

I read the book a long time ago. If you only read the title and thought it was romantic love, you will know that this book is actually about how to deal with the unknowable future after reading the introduction. At that time, I read this book not because I fell into a false philosophy of life and couldn't extricate myself, but because I wanted to invest in stocks. Listening to stock reviews always talk about black swans, I just want to know for myself. Now I think black swans are inescapable, because in addition to events that are black swans for everyone, there are also black swan events that are specific to you. The result is that you can dodge the first day of the new year but not the fifteenth day. The good and the bad always come to you. However, people who have finished reading this book may have a better mentality when encountering a black swan event. What I have been unable to figure out before is now summed up with a particularly artistic name "Black Swan", as if the immediate problem has been solved.

2

Let's talk about "Fragrance".

I borrowed the original book from the library and didn't read it carefully, but just flipped through it. But I really like the movie of the same name. Although the stories and people in the movie have nothing to do with my own life, it is in line with an idea in my heart that everyone wants to have truly beautiful things. This truly beautiful thing can be tangible, such as beautiful landscapes, works of art, and lovers; it can also be intangible, such as honor, happiness, and satisfaction. This truly beautiful thing must be ephemeral, it must be difficult to obtain, it must be rare, and it must create strong competition. Therefore, for people with limited abilities and ordinary backgrounds, they can only be amazed, they will always pass by, they will always regret, and they will always blame themselves. a movie or a story.

3

I've been listening to the audiobook of "The Protagonist" recently.

There are also "black swans" and "wanting to have really good things" in it. In the face of the "black swan", we can pay attention to accumulation, pay attention to the foundation, accumulate a lot, and make a blockbuster, just like the protagonist in the story, Yi Qin E. In the face of the beauty that they really want to have, many people can only give up and destroy themselves. Of course, Yi Qin'e is the really beautiful thing in this story, but the person she has always wanted to belong to is not with her. In the end, the winner is the thick-skinned and stalking deputy commissioner's son. Why did Feng Xiaoxiao give up? Why did he glance at the deputy commissioner's son and Yi Qin'e together and gave up without asking clearly, then left and started drinking too much. This is an inferiority complex rooted in the heart. He still felt that he was not worthy of Yi Qin E. If it is said that Yi Qin'e is closer to the image of "the most beautiful thing in the world" in someone's heart, it must be Feng Xiaoxiao, but if you think of Yi Qin'e too high, you will look down on yourself. But if you really don't look down on yourself, can you compete with the deputy commissioner's son? Still can't compete. When Yi Qin'e is bullied, you can stand up, understand and sympathize, but you can't solve the problem. The son of the deputy commissioner can solve the problem. This is really frustrating.

4

What I want to remember today is three trees.

In my elementary school, there are three trees in the playground. One is tall and straight, one is short but straight, and one is a tree with a crooked neck. I was in elementary school, and I had two best friends. Each of the three of us picked a tree and pretended to be our base, and we would run under the tree every time we got out of class. The tree that belongs to me is the crooked neck tree.

It's not that my friends bully me, or that I'm the slowest runner when picking trees. At the time, I simply felt that the tree with a crooked neck looked good. Why does the tree have to grow straight, I like to grow crooked, what can you do with me? I really had that mentality in my heart at the time.

I like to blaze new trails and be willing to be different. What I appreciate is the scorpion's shit - a unique (poison) share. I was terrified of being drowning in a sea of people, and I didn't want to look up and be seen with the same faces as everyone else.

Knowing this characteristic of me can explain a lot of what happened to me.

For example, when I was in elementary school, everyone was running wild on the playground between classes. I didn't run. I like to climb poles. I can climb the poles that raise the flag to the top. Once, the head teacher of the elementary school was drinking tea in the office between classes and glanced out the window, only to see me climbing to the top of the flagpole, hugging the flagpole tightly and greeting the friends around below. This frightened the head teacher. She didn't dare to call me out loud at that time, for fear that I would fall, but after I got down by myself, she called me to the office and scolded me badly.

For another example, in the first year of university, the teacher of an open course asked us to discuss whether it was necessary to open that course in the first class. The classmates in the lecture hall all said it was necessary, so I had to stand up and go against everyone. I said it was not necessary, and I justified it. Several classmates wanted to debate with me, but they all lost in the end. Finally, a classmate stood up and said: I don't agree with what you said, but I will defend your right to speak to the death. I secretly scolded him for sophistry, but in the end everyone applauded him, and I didn't say anything more. The teacher of this course is very good, and he didn't let me drop the class at the end of the year.

Another example is looking for a job. As normal graduates, students all want to go to municipal schools. I just don't like it. The schools I went to were all affiliated schools run by factories and mines. Finally, I entered a railway school to work, and I was considered a railway employee. I lived in a single apartment of the Railway Bureau, and the work permit was also the badge of the Railway Bureau. Later, corporate schools were taught to the local education bureau, and I also went abroad.

When I was very young, my parents called me a "crossroad". I couldn't understand it at the time, and asked, what is "separation". Answer, it is different from people. Either way.

But people's edges and corners will always be smoothed out. Like pebbles in a river. If you don't go, the water will push you away. To go smoother, you have to lose your edge. Even if you don't want to go at all, it's like staying where you are, the constant flow of water will make you more and more rounded.

Don't want to lose the edge, unless you are hard enough and lonely.

I am quite lonely. I don't need much money, just enough. I don't care much about human relationships. I chat with people I can chat with, and stay by myself if I don't. I don't think there's anything wrong with me.

But I'm not hard enough. Therefore, I still need to cooperate with people I hate on many things, so I still greet many people who I despise myself with a smile on my face. Of course, there is anxiety and internal friction. What Wang Xiaobo said is right, people's suffering is essentially anger towards their own incompetence. If you don't want to suffer, you should either make yourself less incompetent, or you should read more psychological counseling books to make yourself less angry.

The outer circle and the inner square are the way, after all, the crooked neck tree also has to live.