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See "Reconciliation with Mother" from "Our Blues Time" Yudong and Dongxi!

Don't push your parents with trivial things "Why didn't you care about me at that time?" They are likely to be like Yudong, "At that time, they may have tried their best to give you everything they can give you!" After a certain age, people have to learn to take care of themselves like an adult. At least beyond the age at which your parents hurt you, you know better than them to take care of your hurt self.

The last three episodes of "Our Blues Time", the story between Yudong and Dongxi's mother and son, should have hit those long-hidden and painful wounds in many people's hearts. Regarding the matter of "reconciliation", the script is too gentle and gives a very perfect ending.

From Dongxi's point of view, he can finally let go of the trauma he once had in his heart, sit side by side with his mother and walk with her; from Yudong's point of view, she learned that Dongxi has someone who is waiting for him and accompanying him. The last paragraph of life can finally let go of the guilt of the child: Ah! The original choice was just to hope that the children could have a home, someone to take care of, and to go to school. Women who lost their husbands and were incapable in those days might not be able to think of a better way.

Play is like life. The conflicts and contradictions between Dongxi and his mother are not only ordinary things outside the drama. But unlike most dramas, the character of Dongxi is not like the children who broke up with their parents in most dramas. He may be outraged by his parents in order to choose his own path; he may be driven by too many emotions from his parents. Blackmailing the decision, resisting, and finally turning against each other... This character is written in the "children's tenderness" that is rarely mentioned in many drama conflicts.

Most dramas are writing about "parent-child reconciliation", and they use a "rebellious" perspective to present "you will still have to reconcile with your parents one day" "don't regret until the end of the day", but Regarding reconciliation, many times it does not start from "forgive/forgive", but from "feeling", feeling "the other person's tenderness", feeling "the other side's powerlessness at that time", feeling "perhaps the carelessness at that time should also change with time" past and past” and release each other.

Most of the children should be the same as in the past, relying on their parents when they were young, hoping that one day they can become the children their parents expect and can take care of their parents. But often I don't know at what point in time my self-awareness began to grow, and when I disagree with my parents, I refuse to give in to each other and finally attack each other. Can't be opened either.

The script for this show is great.

It took a few scenes and gave Dongxi the answer to "why did my mother do this to me" that he couldn't think of for decades.

One of them, of course, was going to the house of a brother who had a different father and a different mother.

Dong Xi kept thinking, "Why did my mother never speak up for me because I was beaten by my stepfather's child?" It was not until this scene that Dong Xi realized that "Mother saw it, but didn't say anything." In the past, of course, he always thought "Why are they so bad to you, you have to piss and piss them for them, and take care of them until they die." This kind of distress for her mother, but I don't know if my mother understands this feeling? I don't know if my mother felt any grievance in her heart. Dong Xi can only express his reluctance to his mother with anger.

Mother's silence is mostly for the purpose of "relieving things" and not creating more troubles in life, rather than being unable to understand Dong Xi's feelings; mother's inability to express has also become the most difficult wound in Dong Xi's heart to overcome. In particular, he repeatedly said to his mother, "I can also work very hard to live with you. I will take you and follow me. Don't stay in such a family that doesn't cherish yourself." But he didn't get his mother's favor. peers.

Then turn to the last few scenes when Dongxi asked about his mother's youth, and asked his mother: If there is an afterlife... Yudong said, "If there is an afterlife, I hope to be born in a wealthy family, to be able to go to school and to read and write, so that my children don't have to worry about money." Yes! This is the biggest wish of many poor parents! How I hope to give you a good growth environment, but fate is like this, I have tried my best to make you live like a human being, it can only be done like this!

Yudong's life ended when Dongxi hugged her body and cried bitterly.

The good thing is that there is no regret that I didn't say anything at the end; the good thing is that even though Dong Xi called his mother an auntie in old age, he still couldn't match the heartache for his mother, let it go. mother and myself. (If I can't let it go here, Dong Xi will really continue to torture his life with deep regret or incomprehension.)

The entanglement with mother (or father) in this world is often a very small matter, even one of the parties does not remember it, but it is not resolved at the moment. So the Cold War began to pretend to be indifferent, and began to use any means to separate a thick wall from each other, and then detonated the explosion and continued to build the wall again when there was nothing wrong .

Understanding parents is not easy, just like being understood by parents is not easy either. But most of the time indifference is the most fatal key in a relationship. If you don't say, don't mention, don't express, or express your anger, the other party can feel "you hurt me."

What you say or say well will not necessarily be understood. How can you expect that you will not say it, express it or express it in an angry way, so that the other party can feel your sadness, distress or hurt?

When we are young, we expect our parents to understand us, take care of us, and love us. But is it possible that after a certain age, we know how to take care of ourselves, love ourselves, and then tell our parents "how can you be nicer to me" and look back to take care of our parents?

Don't push your parents with trivial things "Why didn't you care about me at that time?" They are likely to be like Yudong, "At that time, they may have tried their best to give you everything they can give you!" After a certain age, people have to learn to take care of themselves like an adult. At least beyond the age at which your parents hurt you, you know better than them to take care of your hurt self.

Maybe when you start thinking about it, you'll find the same situation, you can't necessarily express it better, and you'll start wondering, "Why did you do this then?" Slowly, you can Raise your foot and step over, and see that the elderly parents are still there, but you never come close.

I didn't realize that some things in life have their difficulties when I reached an age. I am more like a person who is not cold and warm like him.

I haven't looked forward to my mother's "why can't she love me more", maybe I hope she can make other choices at some stage of her life, even if I haven't been in this world, it doesn't matter . I am mostly a "bystander", watching the difficulties in her life, watching her use up all her strength at a certain stage of life to stand firm, watching to stay by her side, and I am just like her: we all only Do our best to complete our roles in each other's lives, and don't leave each other with regrets. In this way, it is not easy.

"Our Blues Time" 우리들의블루스/2022
Screenwriter: Noh Hee-kyung Director: Kim Kyu-tae Starring: Lee Byung-hun, Shin Min-ah, Cha Seung-won, Lee Sung-eun, Han Ji-min, Kim Woo-bin, Um Jung-hwa, Kim Hye-ja, Ko Doo-shin, Park Ji-hwan, Choi Young-joon, Bae Hyun-sung, Noh Yoon-seo, Ki So-young

Figure: "Our Blues Time" official website

CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

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