寂然
寂然

寂然,在澳門生活的文字工作者,結集出版的作品包括小說集《有發生過》、《月黑風高》、《撫摸》、《救命》,散文集《青春殘酷物語》、《閱讀,無以名狀》等。

Extinction and Survival

Because seeing someone queuing may attract more people to queuing together, people's psychology is always like this, not necessarily a herd mentality, it is more like struggling to survive.


On July 7, everyone received the news that the city was about to be locked down. At that time, the government issued a statement clarifying that those statements were false. Then on July 9, the government announced that all industrial and commercial activities in Macau will be suspended from July 11 to 18. Except for places that provide daily necessities such as markets, supermarkets, takeaway restaurants, pharmacies, and health care, other businesses including all casinos will be The business is closed. Citizens are not allowed to go out unless necessary. In principle, the bus will be suspended, and only a small number of shifts will be maintained. It is said that the work permit is required to get on the bus. All parks and recreational facilities are closed and no unauthorized entry is allowed. Running and exercising outdoors will be prosecuted. You must wear a designated type of mask when going out, otherwise you will have legal consequences. At the same time, starting from July 10, the Australian market will conduct four national nucleic acid tests at the reserved locations. In this way, our anti-epidemic life has entered a new stage.

They stressed that these measures were not considered lockdowns. They said the restrictions did not count as grounding. They think the fight against the epidemic is a success. People cooperated earnestly with every kind of epidemic prevention measures. After three weeks, they were still in shock and exhausted. In addition, the industrial and commercial activities were completely stopped. How long can those small citizens be able to endure? How can the breadwinners of families who have lost their jobs survive? How do people feel at the moment who are stretched out after a period of unpaid leave? In the face of the virus, everyone is innocent, but for those who already need help, now it is really worse. The number of people infected with the virus is still on the rise. After people heard that the city was about to come to a standstill, they went to the supermarket to buy supplies. There are reports that people are guarding the door of the supermarket, mainly to restrict access and control the flow of people. After that, people queued outside the supermarket. Because seeing someone queuing may attract more people to queuing together, people's psychology is always like this, not necessarily a herd mentality, it is more like struggling to survive.

I've been in a very bad mood these two days. I'm worried about the city, I don't know what will happen after the 7-day shutdown, I'm worried about the risk of my family going out for inspections, I'm worried about the serious sequelae of the shutdown of the whole city, and I'm really worried. Fake news can kill everyone's trust relationship. In the past few days, many relatives and friends have lost their jobs, some friends in small businesses have been complaining, and those who have borrowed money for housing are always worried about being cut wages or being laid off. When the mainstream voices in the society are constantly emphasizing disease prevention and bacteria prevention, whether to wear masks, whether to send money from the government, and whether the food supply in the supermarket is sufficient, the inner anxiety of the head of the family will not be paid much attention and attention by many people. .

I recently started reading Primo Levi's Destruction and Survival, a classic about the Nazi concentration camps of the day. Through personal experience and a large amount of data, the author records and analyzes various personnel in the concentration camps, and outlines the evil and good that human beings can show during the forced labor and massacres under totalitarianism. Reading such a book at this moment is of course extremely painful and heart-wrenching. But it was also a special experience for me, as Levi mentions in the book:

“[Daily life in a concentration camp] is so devastating... The most difficult thing to capture is that boredom, utter boredom, monotonous, constant, the same every day, like being in a prison. And that leads to has the strange effect that the days of your life seem like eternity, but once they are over they are quickly obliterated because those days have no substance. Past time is compressed and thinned no depth whatsoever..."

There is also a passage in the book where survivors look back on the damage to their hearts after the war:

"It makes people lose their freedom, people lose their health, people lose their dignity, people lose everything, and finally people lose their confidence that they can live with integrity."

In this way, I can't tell whether it is because I am too devoted to studying or I am too aggrieved to fight the epidemic and I am tired physically and mentally.

Because all the barber shops in the city are closed, everyone's hairstyles are out of shape. Before, people joked about finding a supermarket that sells wigs to maintain their dignity, and some people said they would buy professional scissors to try at home. Try mutual haircuts with your family. Some friends imitate the "God of Gamblers" style and fix their long hair with hairspray. My plan is still to let nature take its course, to endure the many inconveniences and psychological pressures of fighting against the epidemic, while enduring the three thousand troubles of my own lawlessness.

CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

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