[Write a MV] 3｜"There are no parents in the world who don't love their children", how can you have such an illusion? "Sand Tool"

"There are no parents in the world who don't love their children", how can you have such an illusion?

When I was young, that woman had already regarded her home as a bar, and she was drunk every day, and from time to time she became drunk and yelled and cursed. If there is a moment of silence, it must be smoking.

That's the way the woman is, and that's all.

Yes, I can't call her mom anymore, she can't hear it anyway.

But I heard it clearly.

So when I get home, I quickly put on my headphones. Well, at that time it was still an MP3 player, and the headphone cable was a bit long and would always get knotted. Every time I take it out, I have to take some time to untie it.

Maybe I'm too impatient.

I was afraid, afraid of hearing the woman's monstrous roar, afraid of hearing the constant swearing of the neighbors, and afraid of hearing my own heartbeat that was racing wildly out of fear.

I'm really scared.

I can only be quiet when I hear the music.

That woman wouldn't know, because of her, how difficult it was for me to get home.

I will meet classmates who despise me for being a coward, despise me for not persuading her administrators, and hate her neighbors who live with me.

They may have spurned her, but it was me who felt this oppression.

Getting home is not easy, getting home is even harder.

The smoke filled the air and made me choked to death, not to mention the deafening roar of the woman, which made me panic.

When you get home and want to go back to your room, you have to keep your head down and your feet lightly, like a thief.

Sometimes I really want to ask, am I doing something wrong?

No one can answer me.

If I go home, no cigarettes, no alcohol, no her, and there are only sliced oranges on the table, then I will be happy all day.

Yes, that woman only buys oranges.

The orange on the table is a decoration when she is drunk and dreaming, and it is a food when she returns to the world.

Such a small blessing, I cherish it very much.

So I got used to it. When I was with Orange, I kept looking around, for fear that happiness would disappear too quickly, and I didn't know when she would appear.

Best not to.

One day, I may have been fascinated by ghosts.

When I get home from school, I go to the kitchen to find something to eat. As soon as I entered, I suddenly saw the pack of cigarettes.

I know it's a pack of cigarettes, because the woman never leaves her hand. Afraid of admitting my mistake, I opened it and sniffed it. Well, it was the pack of cigarettes, and I'll never forget the smell, because it stinks as hell.

I don't know why she put it here, and I don't know why I want to put it away.

Without thinking too much, I just put the cigarette behind the candy and went to watch TV.

Before long, the woman returned home. As soon as I entered the door, I went straight into the kitchen, which I didn't mind. Unexpectedly, after a while, there was an earth-shaking voice, and I realized that she was looking for something.

And I should know what she's looking for.

"Bang bang bang bang bang bang bang", she was about to overturn the kitchen, and my fear was about to devour my soul.

Suddenly, she rushed out of the kitchen and jerked me, who was watching TV in the living room, up. She threw me in front of the wall and asked me where the pack of cigarettes was. I said I didn't know, "Crack!" and slapped me heavily. There is the first bar, and there is the second bar. She roars as she beats. I can't really hear what she is saying. I only know that she can't get an answer.

Perhaps the slap was not painful enough, so she picked up the hanger and hit me mercilessly. No matter how much I cried, she kept hitting. Beating, she even squeezed my mouth, so tight. I don't know why she does this, I just feel like I'm dying.

I don't know how long the fight finally stopped, and she didn't know where she ran to.

I couldn't stop crying in the living room, the more I thought about it, the more aggrieved I became. I think it's venting. She wasn't looking for the pack of cigarettes, she just hated me, she wanted me to die.

"There is no parent in the world who does not love their children", believe me, this is really an illusion.

I didn't want to live with someone who wanted to kill me, so I ran away from home.

Later, of course, it was found.

I heard that the woman called all her relatives and friends to find me and called the police. You say, where can I hide when I was a child?

After that, everything changed.

If you want to count the biggest changes, it's probably...

Tobacco, I also fell in love with it.

But I didn't want the woman to know, lest she be complacent and think she taught me this good thing. It's a pity that it was broken later. At that moment, she still wanted to put away my cigarette, which is really crazy. I always want to hide good things and not let others enjoy it, how selfish this woman is.

I grew up, of course, will not let her do. Cigarettes, if you want to smoke them, even if they are put away by her, I can buy them again. Money is everything, and I finally have it.

The earphones that were knotted when I was a child have long since become wireless full-cover earphones. In a life that is upside down day and night, headphones are my best friend. They accompany me home, play musical instruments with me, and isolate me from the world.

Especially when meeting that woman.

That night, playing fairy sticks with friends at the beach.

My friend laughed and said, as a big man, how can I play so easily.

Because I played it a long time ago, when I was a kid.

While I would still call that woman a mother.

A lot of pictures flashed in my mind, my mother said, don’t be afraid of difficulties, remember that my mother is my fairy stick and can always take me out of the dark; my grandmother said, my mother was very hard when I was born, and I want to grow; When I met the woman in the market, she seemed to be lost; the manager said that she saw the woman on the rooftop yesterday afternoon and walked around absentmindedly, frightening him to death; this morning, the woman did not say good morning to me, She was concentrating on ironing the clothes that seemed to be from my childhood...

An ominous premonition drove me home immediately, without headphones.

It was dawn, and she was not in the hall.

In addition to oranges, there is a box of old things on the table. It was empty, except for Zhang... Ultrasound.

The water boiled, and I followed the sound to the kitchen. With a smile on her face, the woman carefully put bottle after bottle into boiling water to sterilize it.

Tears welled up for no apparent reason.

I know why she does this, but I don't want to believe it.

I don't believe that there are no parents who don't love their children, and I don't believe that there are no children who don't love their parents, but I believe that mother and child are connected. I was clearly behind her, and she clearly couldn't see me. But when I was blinded by tears, her smile disappeared.

Her lips were closed, and tears began to flash in her eyes.

I couldn't hold back the tears and fell.

sorry.

sorry.

Mother.

PS

I know that the MV of "Sand Tool" comes from the MV of "Diary of a Madman". But I think that aside from the madman's fate, the part of getting along with mother and son alone is already very thought-provoking. So for the time being, I only write this part in words, to commemorate the moving of this MV to me.

Parents and children, even if blood is thicker than water, absolutely need continuous learning and practice. I hope we can learn it eventually.