How to deal with jealous emotions

Sometimes when I swipe on social networking sites, or chat with friends, I always get some news about other people, such as who got a good internship opportunity, who was admitted to a good university, or who has a lot of friends, Whose life is so wonderful and rich, etc., various emotions will begin to arise in my heart, such as feeling pressure, envy, anxiety and jealousy...

But the paradox is that I clearly know that this is just a part of everyone's life. They must also have something they are not happy with and envious of others, but they can't help but think, "If only I had those things myself", "I I also want to be envied.” And because of these thoughts, I became very unhappy and annoyed myself. On the one hand, I felt that I was so dark in my heart that I couldn’t see the good of others (especially if the other person was my friend). time), on the other hand, he began to doubt himself, and felt as if he knew nothing, so he fell into a dark circle of reincarnation.

Until I watched a video today:

I learned: "Jealousy is part of human nature, we can't avoid it, but we can use it to understand our deepest desires"

There are many examples in the video. For example, a girl often feels angry and jealous when she sees her colleague’s boyfriend coming to pick him up after work. From this point of view, you can think that the girl is someone who is eager to be cared for and taken care of, or If you are dissatisfied when you see your colleagues can be promoted, it means that you also want to have a better position and social status.

Or why do I feel pressured and uncomfortable to see someone else have a rich life, because I just want to be like him, and I want to have a rich life.

And also because of the uncomfortable feeling of jealousy, we have a strong feeling in our hearts, which allows us to take the opportunity to study and understand ourselves. In such a strong feeling of discomfort, we can find out what we really want in the depths of our hearts. s things.

The happiness of others will not stop your happiness

This is something I think is very important, because humans are social animals, so there is bound to be competition and comparison. Therefore, when you see other people's lives continue to improve, while you are still standing in place or even regressing, you will definitely feel uncomfortable, but this At that time, you have to think: [Does their success and happiness have any substantial negative impact on me?] It is possible that there is indeed a competitive relationship between you, such as positions, but this is not a challenge in life, if If you can successfully face this challenge, you should also get a lot of harvest and inspiration, no matter whether the final result is what you think.

However, most of the jealousy we generate is not competitive, and most of the time it's just a simple feeling that others have "something we want too", such as whose girlfriend is really caring, but my girlfriend is so fierce, Whose father bought a new car for him, and I can only ride a motorcycle. Anyone who speaks casually will be a singer. I speak like I want to kill a chicken. …

These jealousies all originate from the scarcity in our hearts, so we find ways to make up for it, relying on actions, perseverance and courage.