As Painful As It Is Worth It: The Value Of Pain And How It Brings Us Happiness

At first glance, the title of the book will feel very masochistic. Does it really have to be deeply painful to feel the meaning of a thing? If so, then I certainly disagree with this theory, and it is fortunate that the content of this book does not emphasize the need for pain as I have plainly speculated, but instead explores the relationship between pain and pleasure, and the difference between voluntary suffering and masochism. The most important thing is how to find the value of pleasure in the pain of life.

Appropriate pain can pave the way for pleasure

After the author's prompting, I realized that immersing myself in sad music or drama and shedding tears is a voluntary and controllable negative experience. However, these experiences can make people happy, and it is no wonder that there are many horrors. Thriller movies are also in demand, because after these mental and psychological shocks, we can get pleasure, and at the same time, we can ensure that it is safe, because it all seems realistic but has nothing to do with our real life, we can simply enjoy the incisive and vivid Feelings can be safe and sound, and you can even find resonance in those experiences and understand that you are not alone, so the pain is not something that everyone avoids as we imagine, but experiences within the limits of what you can bear will make you feel better. The pleasure is multiplied.

The connection between pleasure and meaning

When we do something, we feel pleasure, but it is not necessarily meaningful. It can be seen that pleasure and meaning are independent of each other, sometimes there is a positive correlation, and sometimes there is a negative correlation. For example, our having a relaxed and comfortable life is positively related to happiness, but relatively less related to meaning; a life that is too busy and stressful to start a business is more difficult and torturous. Obviously, it is relatively unhappy, but But relatively meaningful.

The book proposes that the Gallup poll conducted a life satisfaction questionnaire in 2007. As we expected, the happiest countries are the Nordic countries, Australia, Canada, etc., but the countries with the highest meaning of life are Lion Rock, In Togo, Senegal, Ecuador, Laos, Chad and other countries, it can be seen that the poorer the country and the more unstable the people, the more politically unstable people think their lives are meaningful, especially the greater the proportion of religion in their lives, the more likely they are. Feel the meaning of your life.

Seeking short-term pain to release a signal?

The book cites an example that the author personally encountered. The content is probably that a store owner once made more than ten times the price from a certain tourist. Because he felt guilty in his heart, he had no appetite and only drank water and salt the next day. This way of self-punishment makes them feel at ease, but the author wonders why the boss should tell him these past scandals? Is it also showing that he is a good person who knows how to reflect, so that the author can pay for more products?

From this story, I realized that the reason why many people choose to "sell miserable" is because emphasizing that they have the courage and ability to take the initiative to bear pain can prove that they are a very strong person. This is a kind of self-promotion and establishment of The way of image, the signal released is to expect a better evaluation from society , which is one of the reasons why they chose to let themselves experience pain in the first place.

No effort, no happiness

I believe everyone can agree that even though the feeling of when a good thing falls from the sky is beautiful, it is still quite different from the satisfaction that you have achieved through hard work. The pleasure of the former is short-lived, while the pleasure of the latter can last for a long time. , which also means that although the process of hard work is hard and painful, even if the final result is not as expected, we can still feel joy, because we have discovered more potential in the process of hard work, and we can cherish the fruits of the harvest more. . Try to imagine that there must be a huge difference in the joy we feel when we paint our own home and pay someone to do it, not only whether the result is perfect or not, but also the existence of value in the process of hard work, just like everyone always. It is the same as thinking that handmade and freshly picked goods are more precious.

In fact, the experience of writing this book also made me feel a little pain, because most of the content is a very in-depth research report, but how to present it in a simple and clear way without revealing too much of the book's essence and evoking readers' emotions Interest is indeed a test of my patience, but writing here is very fortunate that I overcame the thought of giving up, and thank you for reading this, if you are also curious about various pains, or feel happy and meaningful Pursuit, please open this book to experience an unprecedented thought flip.