[Reading Notes] Debunking the Myth of Sexual Desire and Exploring Women's Autonomy and Gender Equality - "Sex, Lies, Birkins: The New Science of Feminine Desire"

If sex is a big adventure, women are brave explorers. Our sexuality has always been underestimated and controlled. Our motives have been misrepresented and misunderstood for centuries. So my purpose in writing this book is to take you on a daring journey to understand what women really are and set women free.

When it comes to sexual desire, it is traditionally believed that men are more likely to be amorous, while women should be gentle and reserved, paying more attention to emotional belonging than lust. In 1999, when the movie star Jackie Chan had an affair, he said: "Men all over the world will commit crimes. It's not only widely used to refer to men's infidelity, but to some extent, it is an attempt to use scientific endorsement to rationalize the stereotype that men are "innately easy to sow everywhere". However, is it really so?

Following on from the previous book, which dissects the lives of women on Manhattan's Upper East Side and explains the plight of upper-class women, "I'm a Mom and I Need a Birkin! Yale Anthropologist's Undercover Observations on Manhattan's Upper East Side, author Winsdale Martin, published another masterpiece in 2018, Sex, Lies, Birkins: The New Science of Feminine Desire. In this work, she takes "non-one-to-one relationship" as the main axis, and uses various sciences such as biology and genetics to challenge the traditional concept of the role of male and female sexuality. It explains the historical origin behind it, and points out that gender inequality still exists in modern society.

One by one, they told me hesitantly: "Because my sex drive is really strong, and—I don't think I'm suitable for monogamy."

The "unusual is the ordinary" female desire

The so-called "non-one-to-one relationship" also includes "affair." In order to show that women's sexual desire is far beyond the level of public education, the author spends a lot of space on the prevalence of women's affairs, scientific explanations, and sometimes It's even hard not to think that the author is rationalizing "affairs", especially since it has long been taught that "single-sex couples" are the thinking that meets social expectations, and it's easier for people to have trouble with the content.

However, with the step-by-step analysis of the book, readers will gradually begin to understand the author's thinking logic while holding a conflicting mood. Although they may still not be able to fully accept that they are in a "non-one-to-one relationship", they can at least understand All kinds of scientific evidence show that today's popular stereotypes about gender and mainstream discourses about male and female lust are far from reality. The current relationship between gender roles and the agricultural tool "plough", and the habits of human's close relatives, the Barobu ape, further illustrate that perhaps in another parallel time and space, male hegemony will never have a chance to emerge.

"I think for men, there is no period - they're prostitutes... Men play around and that's it, people accept men like that. It's the same with language, there's a period when women actually play... You can't The rest of my life is a prostitute. If it's a man...people take it for granted...George Clooney is married...no one calls anyone a wife!"

A shocking work that talks about women's "sexual" autonomy in the name of having an affair

Like the previous work, Winsdale Martin also used a seemingly curious topic in "Sex, Lies, Birkins: The New Science of Feminine Desire", and then pointed out the final key and Gender issues pervasive in society, behind the elaboration of biological explanations for women's affairs, are actually questioning the degree of freedom afforded to women in modern society. Although the author's writing is fluent and the translation does not hinder the reading process, compared with the previous book, "Sex, Lies, Birkins: The New Science of Female Desire" will give readers greater impact.

It must be emphasized that the author did not really encourage an affair, or tried to promote "non-one-to-one relationship". From many places, it can be seen that the author is still a faithful believer of "monogamy", but only challenges the concept of science. Existing gender, sexuality thinking. As far as a heterosexual man with sexual experience is concerned, reading "Sex, Lies, Birkins: The New Science of Female Desire" may be like an "open relationship" that makes people blush and open up. It expands readers' imagination of gender and sexuality, and creates more space for thinking about gender equality.

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