Is writing full-time the worst career in the world?

Publishing a book is not that fast. My expectations have changed as follows: from publication a year ago to being submitted for review a year ago, from being submitted for review a year ago to being finalized a year ago, and from being finalized a year ago to being finalized a year ago but the title of the book has not yet been determined. Over the next six months, I occasionally made some revisions based on the editor's comments. However, the general direction has not changed, and the workload is not large. The main task is to wait for further editing by the publishing company. I'm a little free. The only thing I have to do is the column, so its performance is more likely to cause me anxiety. I originally thought about waiting for the book to come out and rely on it to attract more readers to subscribe to the column. However, the quiet months of waiting for the news made me feel that the publication of the book was far away and uncertain. I gradually felt that I could not rely on it alone, or even I'm safer by acquiescing that it won't happen. It is difficult to expand the scale of the column solely by relying on one's own personal strength. I get frustrated when articles don’t get engagement, when subscribers don’t renew, and I wonder, is this column an ​​extravagant and failed experiment? When the editors of the publishing companies I felt close to didn't subscribe to it - I came to the conclusion from this consumption behavior that publishing books was a matter for adults, and columns were my pastime that couldn't stand the test of the market. Worth the attention of industry insiders.

The book is still far away and the column cannot be started, but my life goes on. There are monthly rent, taxis, and air tickets. I began to envy the people in the publishing company: they had salaries, offices, and coffee machines, and every coffee bean I ground was bought with my own money, and so was the time I spent waiting. If my book doesn't get published, they will be busy publishing the next book in their plan, but what about me? I feel stupid, how could I think of things so easily? Publishing a book, writing a column, traveling, how can such a good thing be possible? If so, why don't others do it? I suspect that I have fallen into a very expensive pit - the identity of a nomadic writer is earned by burning money day by day. It is consumption, not a sustainable lifestyle.

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