Beyond Existence: When Jeremiah Cursed His Life

傅元罄
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IPFS
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But pain is still pain. Job stared blankly, now; the present that repeats every day. He lost all his children; not feuding, quarreling, and leaving home, and possibly coming back one day—but all dead. Job stared blankly at the things in front of him and the sky. But his God—if there was one—was silent, not making a sound, not even moving a finger.
I wish the day I was born
And the night she said she was pregnant with a boy was gone.
May that day be darkness;
May God not seek it from above;
May the light not shine upon it.
May darkness and the shadow of death claim that day;
May the cloud rest upon it;
May the eclipse terrorize it.
May the night be taken away by darkness,
Rejoice not in the days of the year,
Nor is it included in the number of the month.

1.
When a person says to you, "I don't want to live anymore; I feel like my life is tasteless and meaningless." How do you answer him? This is a very difficult question.

If you want to answer the question of Job, it is relatively simple; because Job in the book of Job is a staunch Jewish believer who abides by the law of "thou shalt not kill", including not killing himself. So, no matter what you say to him or keep silent to him, just turn around and walk away and pretend that you never knew this friend, and you can feel at ease; because even if he gets hit by it, he won't run and kill himself.

But pain is still pain. Job stared blankly, now; the present that repeats every day. He lost all his children; not feuding, quarreling, and leaving home, and possibly coming back one day—but all dead. Job stared blankly at the things in front of him and the sky. But his God—if there was one—was silent, not making a sound, not even moving a finger.

What is left of Job? What else could he do but curse his own life? So, through the mouth of Job, the author wrote one of the most thrilling psalms in Hebrew culture, which is the third chapter of Job: "May the day I was born, and the one who said that he conceived a male child. The night is gone.”

2.
In ancient Hebrew culture, the Book of Job was a very bold work: because it radically questioned the justice of God. Job relies on his own experience and his own pain: who can deny that this is true? This person who is suffering, this "I", has to admit that this is true, even if he wants to escape the pain. So, where is God?

In this world without God (if God does not exist), or a world in which God has abandoned us (if God exists), even a devout as a Hebrew must find another way out in his own experience. Job will not be the first; nor will he be the last.

Woe to me, my mother! Because you have made me a strife all over the land. I have never borrowed from anyone, and no one has borrowed from me, but everyone curses me.

Criticists of later versions speculated that the monologue given by the prophet Jeremiah in despair may have influenced the author of the Book of Job, allowing him to express his thoughts bolder, more candidly, and more deeply. What happened to Jeremiah, however, was not as irretrievable as what happened to Job: although failure was likely, there was still a glimmer of hope.

Besides being a religious prophet, Jeremiah also lived as a moral and life condemner of people: such a role would certainly not be popular with his countrymen. But let's take a hundred steps back: at least Jeremiah didn't use violence against anyone, yet he was intimidated, arrested, imprisoned, and threatened with his life. Apart from the physical danger, the position he was standing in was also very lonely. From his monologue, "Woe to me, my mother! For you have given birth to me as a strife in the land," but he also dictated these words to his disciples: We may guess that, His parents are now dead. Then his situation is even more lonely.

The LORD said, "I will strengthen you for your good. I will make your enemies cry to you in times of trouble and trouble."
Lord, you know;
Please remember me and look after me,
avenge my persecutors for me;
Do not take my life against them with anger,
Know that I have been insulted for your sake.

Next, as Jeremiah recounts his own life, he adds another group of characters: the enemy. He uses a word that is terrifying and appealing to us: "revenge"; he longs for his suffering to be avenged on the enemy. What does it mean? In addition to the most direct and literal meaning, we can also note: he said, "Don't take my life on their wrath." Jeremiah avenged his life, not just out of anger and hatred. Moreover, he entrusted the matter of revenge to prayer and to God who is always silent in the world, blocking his chance to avenge himself. The psalmist said in the mouth of God, "When calamity and affliction come, I will make the enemy cry to you." This is not so much a cry of hatred as a cry of longing to be reconciled to the people one day.

After a short description (vv. 16-17), Jeremiah returns to his own reality, weeping over his situation with no way out and no hope.

Why does my pain last forever?
Why can't my wounds be healed, not healed?
Are you deceitful to me, like a dry river?

At this time, Jeremiah excluded the enemy again: although it was the enemy of this world who actually attacked him, causing him pain and scars, but to Jeremiah, it was the injustice of his God and his broken promises. The problem. Through the God of disobedience, Jeremiah once again turned the arrow of his hatred away from his own people. Even from a missionary point of view, Jeremiah's enemies were people he so desperately wanted to win, and he could not long hate them while sticking to the prophetic path he had chosen. "They shall return to you, but you shall not return to them."

Thus says the Lord: If you return,
I will bring you again,
make you stand before me;
If you separate the precious from the base,
You can be my mouth.
they will return to you,
but you shall not return to them.
I will make you a strong bronze wall to this people;
They will attack you, but they will not prevail against you;
For I am with you to save you, to deliver you.
This is what the Lord said.
I will deliver you from the hand of the wicked,
redeem you from the hand of the rapist.

At the end of the psalm, we have a protected promise: "I will deliver you from the hand of the wicked, and redeem you from the hand of the rapist." But whether it's Jeremiah or Job, experience After so long of disappointment, how much more can we trust this promise? However, Jeremiah has already chosen this way of life, enduring all kinds of pain and moving forward. He tries to always stand on the right side of his mind, but he is also always open, waiting for the return of others.

Rembrandt: "Jeremiah laments the destruction of Jerusalem." Europeana null on Unsplash, courtesy of Rijksmuseum

3.
I try hard to see the scenery, to see everything around me, but I will never find them beautiful again. I pick up the pen and write down some things; keeping them far away will not affect me. In this way, I felt reassured and prevented from being afraid; I still seemed to feel some joy, some hope.

When can I forget you? It is safe to talk about you, and take our memories as happy and memorable days. But now it's just me. Live every day; I definitely want to live, but I don't want to live either. Time passes every second; but they add nothing but more regrets.

I often blame God, if He exists. Why were we born? And why abandon us. If, without God, the world comes from some mysterious substance; and this mystery is not intended to call us to immortality, or resurrection. Then I said: go find someone else. You let them be born and die. You give us our life back and let us stay in nothingness forever.

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