"Thinking" talks about society's misunderstanding of "pursuit of perfection". Is perfectionism really so unbearable?

Violet99
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IPFS
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The endless chicken soup for the soul on the Internet tells us that perfection is exhausting, perfection is an obstacle, and perfection is impossible. But perfectionism is not an obstacle, but a stepping stone; not an excuse, but a driving force. If we keep the idea of 'good enough', we are forced to accept low standards. The world is telling you 'stop chasing perfection', so let me tell you 'please do your best to strive for perfection'.

You may find that my articles are updated very often. Sometimes it is updated every three days, but more often it is updated after more than a week, which is also the problem that bothers me the most after I start writing.

I would like to be like other authors, producing very good articles every day, but it has been stagnant because it is not as perfect as I would like it to be.

'I'm so busy today, I must not be able to produce good content. '
'It was so noisy, I couldn't concentrate. '
'Tomorrow I will definitely be able to write the perfect article. '

To this end, I have always considered myself a 'perfectionist', and I hope that I can write the perfect article at the perfect time, in the perfect place, with the perfect mentality. If something goes wrong in the process, the work will be delayed indefinitely.

But am I really a so-called perfectionist? Or is 'perfect' just an excuse for me to procrastinate?

What is perfectionism?

 Perfectionism is similar to what people call obsessive-compulsive disorder. It is an extreme pursuit of perfection and flawless thinking based on dissatisfaction and imperfection everywhere. It is formed due to the lack of communication and security in extreme environments. And pathological perfectionism can make people pursue high and unattainable goals, and bring great pain to failure.

This is the definition of perfectionism. Pathological perfectionism is our cognitive perfectionism, and so-called perfectionism should not be a derogatory term, and it is much more than that.

I believe that everyone has heard others say or said it themselves in life: I am a perfectionist. And in the back of this sentence, often followed by a series of excuses.

🔒 I'm perfectionist and I don't want to report any bugs, so I take longer to finish.

🔒I'm in a bad mood today, so I can't focus on my studies, because I'm a perfectionist, and I don't want to affect my results because of my emotions.

However, from these statements, we can see that what we fear is not doing this well?

Not really. What we fear is the consequences of not doing it well, we don't want to face failure, we are afraid of failure, so we choose 'perfectionism', hoping to avoid failure through perfection.

Is it wrong to strive for perfection?

 'The pursuit of perfection will hinder you';
'There is a kind of excellence, called not pursuing perfection';
'People who pursue perfection are less healthy';
'Don't pursue perfection, accept the complete you in front of you'

I'm sure you've seen a lot of similar content on the Internet. These so-called chicken soup for the soul are telling us that perfection is exhausting, perfection is an obstacle, perfection is impossible.

The paradox of the above examples is that most of the articles are instilled with the concept of 'giving up perfection to become a more perfect person'. If we follow and do not pursue perfection to achieve perfection, isn't it also perfectionism?

Not every perfect step can create a perfect individual, people gradually become perfect in the process. In the same way, what happens to our lives if we do not strive for perfection? If 'perfection' is so bad, what are we trying to do? Doesn't any effort push us toward perfection?

Good Enough - good enough

'You're good enough' is repeated in these articles against the pursuit of perfection.

💭 Let's think with a simple example:

If Apple thinks he's good enough, then he'll just keep selling the iPhone 1, so why keep developing new iPhones?

Although perfection cannot be achieved, every step, every process, every component is on the road to the pursuit of perfection. If we keep the idea of 'good enough', we are forced to accept low standards .

If Apple thinks it's good enough after launching the iPhone 1, will there be so many new iPhones that cater to modern needs? The answer should be no.

We need to recognize the fact that if you always think I'm good enough, you will always be you, not a better you.

fear of failure

Then again, I'm a morbid perfectionist when I procrastinate writing because I'm afraid of failure.

I was afraid that my article would be rejected, that it would be ineffective, and that the point of view expressed was not clear enough, so I procrastinated again and again until everything was in line with my ideals.

And the so-called perfection is just a reason to procrastinate, because I have written in one day and the same effect in a week.

⭕️ 'It feels right', I can quickly produce articles;

❌ 'It didn't feel right', I needed a week to finish it.

Perfect excuse, I've tried it many times.

And perfectionism is often not about accepting failure (a week is not too long), but about facing failure (how to produce articles more quickly).

📣Share a little story about playing 'Sheep and Sheep' recently.

In the process of eliminating blocks in the game, as long as I click the wrong block by mistake, or feel that eliminating the block is not the best choice, it may cause me to get into trouble later, and I will decisively end the round.

I will not try to save the situation. It's an anchoring effect , because if I don't get through, I think 'it's because of the wrong block' and I can't get through. I'm afraid of failure with this mistake, so I'd rather start all over again.

This is also a kind of morbid perfectionism. I want to end this game perfectly, and any mistakes are not allowed.


Summarize

Perfectionism is not an obstacle, but a stepping stone; not an excuse, but a driving force.

No one is perfect, this sentence is true, but it is undeniable that we can easily see at a glance who is on the road of 'pursuit of perfection' and who is in the pit of 'I am good enough' middle.

The world is telling you 'stop pursuing perfection', so let me tell you 'please do your best to pursue perfection' and stop the fear of failure, because failure is an important factor in creating perfection.

In the face of failure, grow in failure, don't accept failure, be forced to accept lowering your own standards.

Thank you for your patience in reading. If you like it, please give me a like. I look forward to sharing with you next time.

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