dazed dream short notes

蘇祁
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(edited)
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IPFS
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I thought I was special to you at first sight. However, it turned out that I was just a piece of gray cement in the loneliness of thousands of buildings in the city.

02. 07. 2021

 The same forZ's old text.
In fact, if I am brokenhearted, I prefer to write articles in the second person, because I really want to say these things to them, but I dare not.
Then, when you are in love, saying that you are awake is usually a hypocrisy of self-deception. I have seen a sentence before, "Real forgetting does not require effort", I agree with both hands and feet.


PART1 misses you.

The day before yesterday, I dreamed of you again. Your brother and I went out to play for a long time. At the end, I took a note with your handwriting on it. It said that you like me.

I've always liked your brother's face, but I'm only particularly happy when I get the note.

You can lie to yourself during the Duan exam. It’s normal if you don’t answer me when you’re busy, but now I don’t know how to explain it to myself. Before the exam, I sealed you up. In order not to remember that you didn't return to me, I pretended not to see you and took a step back.

I also took a step back.

I really dare not take the initiative to find you again.

Seeing the kind of sore feeling that I have read, I will appear from time to time this week, and I will not let go of my heart, and the pain will last for a long time. But I still don't have the courage to come to you, and I think it makes me look like an annoying jerk who posts backwards.

You don't like it.

I've been looking for you, like an interruption.

No, just to interrupt.


Your online time is frequent again, but it's not because of me, so what? Did you find another person like me to accompany you for the next paragraph?

What should I do in the same place.

You probably have to say "I don't know" again.


It is said that liking a person is particularly low self-esteem, silent, seems to be true. Ever since I realized that I am really interested in you, I have been very contradictory. I want to make you tolerant of me, but I have to be careful that you will be uncomfortable.

For this reason, I specially opened an ig account, and I will never dare to ig send those words about you again.

You are going to Taipei, although I don't usually see you, but you are leaving again... I don't know what to say, or, no one can say, I like you or I don't like you.


PART2 woke up, and I woke up too.


Along with the dream that turned out to be a dream. The days have finally fallen to the ground in the erratic wandering, and become a heavy reality, the warm and bright fire has been extinguished, hope gurgling from the hole in my heart, the despair that is dyed black by the world, hugs the left alone of me.


I thought I was special to you at first sight. However, it turned out that I was just a piece of gray cement in the loneliness of thousands of buildings in the city.

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蘇祁馬特市新手。ig帳號同名,沒盜文嘿。 雖然下雨天很煩,但還是很喜歡下雨天的北漂台大生。 讀小五的時候因為喜歡的男孩不喜歡自己所以開始創作,寫到現在,打算寫一輩子。 在某本言情上看過一句話,「這世界上所有人都註定蠅營狗苟的活一輩子,可是每個苟且的偏旁,都應該是讓自己來寫的。」 深以為此話說的對極了。
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當浪漫被現實淋濕之後--電影<A Rainy Day in New York>

Z和我的過去--下篇<晚安與海>

Z和我的過去--中篇<漸進線>