have a solution

Since July, I have started to go to practice on two, three or four on weekdays, and go to college for meetings and training on weekends and six days.

Said to be busier than before, in fact, I hope to start making money sooner. Maybe because the academy doesn't send out the money when the time is up like a normal company, so I'm still a little nervous.

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I think if you have to go through such emotional ups and downs once a week, you will be more motivated to write down your current feelings, right? Even if you haven't seen the result yet, in the process of growing up, you still have to try your best to run forward first; and how many people would be willing to record such a state and show it to others?

I just think that people who work hard to live every moment are worthy of respect.

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This month seems to be very crucial for me.

The new job is starting to run, but both the supervisor and the employee are myself; in fact, I am uneasy about the situation where I may be alone for a long time in the future (which is probably every day I am uneasy ^^), so I am very Efforts to extend learning, I hope the efforts can be somewhat effective. In order to allow myself to be constantly stimulated in different ways, I also began to look for some occasions where I can learn and communicate; the recent me is very different from the past me.

Maybe you have a clear goal and direction? So no matter what, I hope to grow as soon as possible.

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My friend J told me that he didn't understand where my confidence came from. I return him, I gave it to myself (?

To be honest, I didn't feel like I was particularly confident, so when he asked me, I didn't know what to answer. All I know is that I'm someone with a clear goal and I'll figure out a way to get there, and that's it. But even if there is a goal and a direction, there is still a lot of self-doubt and fear in the process of progress, which is unquestionable. But another advantage of mine is that when faced with these fears, I will always find a way to face and deal with them.

"I'm so much better than the very negative self I used to be! I'm already great! I can be even better!" Maybe it's just this thought that sustains me.

It's another story with J, maybe later.

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I have always wanted to go abroad. So in the cracks in my daily life now, as soon as my mind starts to fall, I fill it with this dream.

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I sincerely recommend everyone to listen to Sakamoto Ryuichi's Aqua when you feel uneasy. At least it helps me now.