Reading notes丨When can I get peace? (Reading Liao Yiwu's "The Man Calling the Corpse")

Before the report began, Tong Weige recounted the story of Darius I's expedition to the Scythians described by Herodotus .

When the two armies were facing each other, when the swords were at war, the Scythian soldiers saw the hare passing by, so they left a generation of emperor Darius I on the battlefield, and swarmed to chase the rabbit. The Scythian women and children who went all the way north due to the war finally saw the legendary "north with falling feathers" that no one could see. They thought it was the end of the world, so they sent someone to send a book home.

So he bent his bow and rode his horse, and turned back to his hometown with lush water and grass from the whiteness of the extreme north. I was still a child when I set off, and I was already a grown man when I returned home. The Scythians have no writing, but everything on the way is engraved on him, and he himself is the family letter. When he finally arrived, he faced his clansmen, took out a feather, and said, "A big invisible bird flew by, and the feathers fell down one after another. It is a letter from home, and I am an annotation."

Tong Weige said: "Herodotus told us from ancient Greece that in the face of resistance and suffering, we must still maintain a sense of calmness and freedom in our hearts. Okay, let's start to report Liao Yiwu's Corpse Man."

【one】

For Liao Yiwu and his works, I feel both familiar and unfamiliar.

What impressed me most was that in the book "The Cave Dancer and the Sichuan Cuisine Cook", he wrote the story of the cave dancer, saying that there are some dance halls in Chengdu that were converted from air-raid shelters. After the jubilee, there is still movement.

The Dongdong Ballroom he mainly wrote about is in Mengzhui Bay, and the Chengdu station of "Southern Weekend" is also there, where I practiced in my junior year. As an intern reporter, I didn’t do well, and I didn’t have any enthusiasm. That road carried my bad memories, but for Liao Yiwu, that space itself is a heavy history.

This made me question whether my bond with this country is too superficial, and sometimes feel that I am responsible for those cruel things if I am living under the red flag, and sometimes question the authenticity of the stories written by Liao Yiwu—— —Maybe it’s because I can see a too real picture from his words, which seems too conclusive for a literary work. Even more absurd.

He wrote a lot of shadowed history. I used to think that I was a group that was more active in learning about those histories, and I was still complacent that I didn't fall into the "exam-taking history". At this moment, I finally feel the unreality brought about by the lack of collective memory.

I'd be content with people's general recounts in a few words, frowns and sighs, coherent lists of information, and the constant retelling of those days by those with better word skills. I accept this with peace of mind, but it actually makes me lazy.

On the one hand, for me, the people in the square were frozen in that era, I forgot that they were still alive, and their creations today are also related to the present. On the other hand, I have been reading the records of educated intellectuals, but I have forgotten the broader silent crowd, and I dare not imagine the extreme human nature exposed under the wheel of the times.

Liao Yiwu's book finally pulled me out of the safe zone and forced me to rethink these issues.

【two】

Liao Yiwu uses the language mode he is most familiar with - written language and dialect go hand in hand. He firmly grasped this convenient weapon in his hand, and cut open one thing straight-forward. Most of the interviewees also have a strong desire to talk, so the story moves quickly, and the mutual comfort in the dialogue becomes a buffer zone, and the gas pedal takes a breath. Often there are lyrical passages and veiled puns at the end of the essay, either abruptly or lingeringly.

But even though he writes so crisply, I'm slow to read.

Liao Yiwu's unhurried statement contained a mass of anger. He knows where to hide the fire, and when you gnaw over it all the way in amazement, it will explode as soon as you reach the location, and there will be a thunder on the ground. You want to look back at the place where the blood burst out, and you want to follow him to go on, so you are anxious and flustered, but he keeps his own pace, as if it is no big deal to him. This makes people a little angry.

Only after getting used to his tricks did he realize that Liao Yiwu was hiding behind the name "Lao Wei" to pretend to be numb.

Each story is presented in dialogue between Williams and others, but definitely not verbatim. The order, rhythm, tone of these stories and Lao Wei's questioning must have been "post-produced", so there are so many "Liao Yiwu" lurking between the lines.

for example:

Caper: What to do is not important, the important thing is to find yourself. In the past, I was ashamed to mention blind parents in front of people, thinking that such things would not be on the table; through imprisonment and various refinements, I realized that the fate of ancient and modern artists coincides. Therefore, the avant-garde music I make only absorbs some western elements, but the roots are still in the streets. I often turn on the answering machine and record the hustle and bustle of the world while walking on the street. In the dusty endless hustle and bustle, I add my own weak singing.

Lao Wei: I have already listened to the disc you gave me. This is also a kind of record.

Caper: My parents were just performing arts, but I use music itself to record performing arts. We are all blind, we can't find our way. At this moment, back in time, I was four years old again, a thin little boy was picking his nose while leading a group of blind entertainers to the casino of the dead.

—— "The Corpse Man"

Liao Yiwu himself is a street performer, who plays the traditional musical instrument, the dongxiao, and has been in prison. This section of the street performer's sudden and joyful lyricism is Liao Yiwu's confession no matter how you look at it.

Although he said:

I admit that I have written about the underlying history that has passed away like rivers, and even discovered the survival secrets of this nation under long-term violent rule by digging these life stories, but I write old news, and I have no point of view. Only politicians, profiteers and whores have a clear point of view, especially when it comes to clients.

——"Earthquake Madhouse"

Confusing yourself with others, you can feel that it is two life experiences communicating and wrestling in the same era. Although he tried his best not to write about himself, the story became more vivid because of the addition of "Liao Yiwu". This is what I admire about him. He did not deliberately pursue the so-called "objectivity".

If a writer blindly requires himself to be objective and calm, even forcing himself to lose his own personality and become completely reasonable, I think this is definitely a terrible thing.

A real conversation is when you open yourself up and try to understand the other person's point of view, whether you agree with it or not. This is an exchange of equals.

【three】

However, the matter of communication, especially "equal communication", is really easier said than done. Not to mention the object of Liao Yiwu's attention, even in our daily life, it is often difficult to do so.

So, in the process of reading the book, I kept asking myself, if this person stood in front of you, would you interview him? If you would interview him, would you communicate with him like Liao Yiwu? If you can communicate with him like Liao Yiwu, do you have the courage and writing skills to write these stories? Who would he become to you if you wrote it down?

The last question is an ethical issue that has been bothering me, and I can't answer it, feeling rather hopeless about myself. Even if talking, listening, and documenting happened (with luck), how am I going to write about disaster as a non-experiencer rather than a survivor.

As for Liao Yiwu, he has experienced bloody, violent, deportation, imprisonment, darkness, and wandering days alone. When he crawled out of the gate of hell, he was labeled as a political prisoner, so everyone was afraid to avoid him. The political disaster gave him a new identity, and he became a member of the bottom, giving him a natural soil to talk to these silent people.

I think there should be an indescribable tacit understanding between Liao Yiwu and his interviewees: they can read themselves from each other's eyes, and only then can they look directly at themselves and others bloody after being cut open. Being able to throw this kind of self in front of the other party without too much explanation, I think it is not only out of honesty, they are grasping the last straw that appears in front of themselves when there is no one to say, nothing to do, and no branch to rely on .

【Four】

Liao Yiwu is undoubtedly brave and even ruthless. He seldom shows his cowardice. He only writes that Zhang Meizhi, a victim of land reform, suddenly became vulnerable. He said:

I had to temporarily turn off the answering machine and bow my head in remorse. There was a strong wind outside, and there seemed to be countless invisible feet kicking the beams of the house, creaking and shaking. I have investigated countless cases of injustice, and I thought my heart was as solid as a stone, but now I am in a state of confusion—what's the point of pursuing it like this? We are all human, and we all have the right to forget our nightmares and choose a more relaxed way of life.

"You are you, you can't become me, even if you are struggling there, I can only watch silently"

It's good to be able to "watch", but you can't stay in place all the time. After staring at it, just walk away? Or like me, write it down and publish it publicly, adding a little unhappiness and short-term depression to your life?

In the future, the earth is still turning, autocracy is still going on, and human beings are born and died like insects and ants. Can it change a little bit? God is there, does he find it funny when I think about these questions?

The most decent answer is that this nation needs history. But apart from bringing countless troubles and disasters to every Chinese, the country, nation, government and other things are nothing but falsehood and madness.

Come on, don't waste your extra brains.

—— "The Corpse Man"

This was the first time I saw Liao Yiwu admit his panic, but it made me feel a little relieved.

He is always looking for other people's stories, on the one hand to record, and on the other hand, by taking the initiative to go to the third party's position, he gives himself a more detached perspective, so as to temporarily forget his identity as a victim.

As a reader, I see him trap himself in a cage, struggling more and more tense.

If it wasn't an extremely sensitive person, how could there be such a tragic brushwork? Every time he interviews and writes, he does take responsibility, especially for history, but at the same time he uses other people's memories to sting himself again, which is too cruel for him.

Liao Yiwu used his talents to add a little light to the world, and I admire him very much. At the same time, I feel pity because he still seems to be recounting his suffering, trying to give some strength to his younger self, but forgetting that the scars were born with him in this world and cannot fade away.

The machine in reality can only take pictures of the people and things at this moment, but the machine in the brain can penetrate the people and things at this moment, extend the lens all the way, and look into the soul of the other party, the history that has been wiped out The fragments would come together piece by piece and recombine into a hideous thing known as a 'witness'.

——"Earthquake Madhouse"

This is what he learned from Kapuczynski.

But Kapuczynski also said a very beautiful saying: " The border beyond one's own experience is the world. "

Liao Yiwu failed to do this, but got stuck in the mud, which made his writing less flavorful. Strings that are stretched too tightly will become jerky. Although, some jerky is intentional and should not be done.

Reading his speech at the opening of the Lessing Theater Festival reminded me of his identity as a poet, not just as an "answering machine of the age" given to him by suffering. But what he said was:

I will continue to sway on this world stage.

Like a dog without a nationality,

Sometimes it whines, sometimes barks, and sometimes tucks its tail in thought.

My hometown is in a glass of wine.

If one day I unfortunately quit drinking, my hometown will be in my daydream.

There is never peace in my heart.

But in fact, from the very beginning, what he lacked was freedom.

From a personal point of view, I very much hope that Liao Yiwu will stop walking in foreign countries with the label of "politics", and become a free poet, expel the nightmare as soon as possible and find freedom.

And people born at this time should also constantly examine themselves, the present and the past. All those who have experienced suffering should receive more appropriate feedback.

【five】

Liao Yiwu wrote a new article in September 2015, called " My anger is decreasing day by day ", which describes a street reading he participated in in Germany held by a Syrian writer who is now taking refuge in Germany, in order to oppose held by government forces. He found himself still angered by the crimes of power, but the anger dwindled into a sense of powerlessness in these tumultuous times.

It's actually pretty good, he has suffered so much, he deserves a quiet time, and anger can be handed over.

I think that when facing an object that arouses our desire to create, it is important to find a way to get close to him, and find our own position in the process of communicating with him.

Just like Liao Yiwu, he put himself in a position of eternal pain. On the one hand, he scrutinized the disaster with cold eyes, and on the other hand, he never really left the bottom of China. This makes his writing full of contradictions. It is history and not history, but report It is not a report either, it is both real and fantastic, subjective and objective, colliding with strong compassion and sorrow, but it is the best commentary of that era.

Finally, I conclude with a passage from Liao Yiwu:

There is too much news in this world. In fact, there is no need for the dictatorship to suppress it forcibly, and the latter will always cover up the former. Because human beings need laughter and forgetting, even if they are sitting on a pile of dead bodies higher than the mountains and deeper than the sea, they still need laughter and forgetting to increase the courage to survive and reproduce. …In addition to the news, there is old news. Under the life of human beings floating around like water hyacinths, there are still torn roots spreading under the dark sludge.