The Muppets in Erchang Park

People who like to read will definitely want their family members to be readers. Although my son and daughter also like to read, they are different from me. They are only immersed occasionally instead of like me, who just read a book when they have nothing to do. Maybe it's because of my age, let me use reading to help me clarify some ideas on such a day, but did I read so seriously when I was young? I can't seem to remember.

Among Sanmei's two children, her daughter is very much like me. She likes reading and buying books. We often exchange the books we buy, so that we can read more books without spending so much money. This "Er Chang Park" is a novel she lent me on her own initiative.

I once read Zhang Xi's prose: "I Will Continue to Brew Plum Wine" . When I read her writing at that time, I thought her writing was very delicate. She seemed melancholy in her writing, but the use of words was quite pleasing. Reminds me of Wu Xiaole's article. Although it is not easy to read, it has depth. Zhang Xi's book also made me feel the same way, and also put a lot of effort into the pondering of words.

This novel is her first novel. It can be regarded as a book that deeply describes the conflicting emotions in people's hearts caused by inferiority complex, self-esteem and so on. It also contains the daily thoughts that ordinary people may have. Personally, I think it is very Proximity also touches the deepest aspects of our hearts.

I think she uses " muppet" to describe people who are no longer pure and innocent. Because we are already filled with things that do not belong to us, these jealousy, intrigue, scheming, resentment, low self-esteem, scruples, and expectations from others, etc., have filled our bodies, and it is indeed like a cloth filled with cotton. I.

In order to protect himself from harm, he also used indifference to freeze himself, thinking that he was hiding himself well, but he had already been hurt so deeply that he lost any feeling. So he became less and less like himself, and eventually became a puppet that was neither like himself nor others.

The description of "muppet syndrome" is very special, but it is also in line with people's personalities in today's society. It seems that I am no longer myself, and there is a part of others and a part of myself. The two personalities are intertwined. It's like the original color picture has become black and white, and I want to like myself but I hate it unconsciously.

Muppet syndrome is that you often feel that you are not good, and you are too concerned about the criticism of others, so that the more you live, the less you are like yourself, and even disgust. So over-packaging, let the real self completely submerged in these wrapping paper.

Just like Yang Sizhi, another character in the book, he always lives for others and is like a walking corpse. Although he can breathe, he can't breathe fresh air, and all he breathes is the vicious gas that others spit out.

I like to express a pure person with beautiful and sincere flowers on the head in the book. Such a person can live alone without being affected by other people's eyes and words, and everyone's flowers are different.

The protagonist of the book, Sachiko, originally had blue roses on her head, and Physician Kou was a gardenia. However, Sachiko, who was gradually influenced by other people's words, gradually withered the petals, and finally she became a puppet.

I can't help but wonder, have I become a puppet too? Sometimes I live as if I don’t live the way I want, and I care too much about other people’s eyes. As a result, I can’t live the way others want, and it’s not what I want.

Or like the protagonist in the story, because of jealousy and envy, he left malicious intentions on other people's social networking sites. Things that I don't like, but because of my dissatisfaction and anger, I hate others.

Although I don't know how to do this, have I ever had such a little thought in the subtle part of my heart? But no matter how subtle, it is malicious.

Think again if I live like myself and live comfortably, what kind of flowers will bloom on my head?

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We are more or less burned by the sharp words from other people's mouths, but how to train ourselves to accept these hurtful words and become ourselves at ease is really not an easy task.

But try to learn that no matter how criticized by others, you can choose whether to accept it or not, take this choice in your own hands, and never let anyone take it away. I think this is the ultimate focus of this book.

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I think the author healed the readers through the words of Doctor Gu Xiaogu in the book, and also expressed the deepest load in people's hearts. I quite like this arrangement and the direction of the story. Although I didn't know what the story to tell was at first, and the narrative mode was a bit slow, until I saw the word cotton wool, I wanted to continue to see why I saw cotton wool where there should not be cotton wool. So the more you look back, the more exciting it becomes.

The following is what Dr. Xiaogu said in the book, and I think it can be put forward as a way of thinking. It is also a reflection on ourselves to see if we too have biased thoughts about ourselves.

P203: "It's just, Zian, you know, whether it's praise or criticism, we all have the right to choose whether to keep it on ourselves or not. Not all compliments have to be accepted, and not all criticisms are meaningless.

So you leave his praise, not necessarily every word he said. Although, it is very difficult and painful to tear off the evaluation that he is sticking to you. But I still want you to know that you have the right to tear it apart.

P203: If we forget that we actually have the right to choose whether or not to praise and criticize, we can only constantly evaluate ourselves in the eyes of others, and in order to prevent ourselves from being criticized, we will fall into dependence. A vicious cycle of living in the eyes of others.

This is the root cause of Muppet syndrome, not just about what other people think.

P205 It is human nature to imagine the future and cherish the past, but only by living in the "now" can we create more reality for ourselves.

P205 Remember, not being loved does not mean that you are not worthy of being loved.

225: Life is fluid, all things are fluid, including love, including freedom, these beautiful words, including your name, what you believe and feel. Because nothing is constant, change often leads to imbalance. In the process of imbalance, some people will find a way to live with the imbalance, perhaps by deceiving themselves, perhaps by complaining, or by actively seeking change.

225: Actually, I don't like when people say in a negative tone, "Life becomes complicated when you grow up," as if a child-like life is the best. Why should we grow up with stigma? Every stage has its beauty. Growing up gives us the ability to take on more people's visions, to break through these, to insist on doing what we like, and even more dare to admit our vulnerability.

229: No one can really let go of everyone's expectations. It's not terrible to care about other people's vision and expectations. What's really terrible is to think too absolutely that this is bad and wrong.

That would take itself to the extreme. When society promotes being yourself too much, we forget that sometimes, a small concession is to allow ourselves to be kind to others and to be kind to ourselves. Especially those we care about and those we love. Especially when we hate ourselves.

P230: This may seem like a cliché, but the truth is that when we don’t really accept where we are, we’ll always think we’re not enough, and we won’t be able to create more reality for ourselves by living in the “now.”

P230: No one is enough. The goal of our efforts is not only to eliminate the inferiority complex caused by this imperfection by changing ourselves as much as possible, but also to try to regard this imperfect state as normal. We often think that when we solve a problem, all problems will be solved. The truth is, having troubles, having an imperfect life, having an imperfect body, is very common.

Therefore, it is normal to care about the eyes of others, it is normal to be vulnerable, and it is normal to have low self-esteem. But don't let your low self-esteem make you miss the life you want and the people who treat you well.

P234: Inferiority will eventually make a person as low as dust.

I recommend this book to you. May we all live comfortably and lightly, and don’t be blocked from the direction of making ourselves happy by the malicious words of others.