Life Fun Facts｜Textured Life——Red Wine, Gifts, and My Dad

This article is written to my dearest lazy dad.
Contains two stories of "Wine" and "Gift" , one of which was first published on my Liker Social and then retouched.

wine tasting

It's Father's Day, at the sloth's dinner table.

Lazy Dad opened a bottle of cheap red wine bought from Costco and poured half a glass for himself and Lazy Brother.

The dark red wine swayed with the yellow light of the dining table, "Ah, I want it too!" I shouted, and I was going to get a red wine glass.

"Please!" Lazy Dad: "Sloth, can you drink red wine? You have to be able to taste red wine before you can drink it."

The lazy dad who drank a little bit of wine was all excited: "Like this—" He took another sip of the wine and started his exaggerated comedy show: "This wine has a strong aroma of fruit and grapes, drink it It's a fruit vinegar scent, and the taste is very "sloppy" —"

"Dad, it's dry ." I looked dead and sat aside.

The lazy dad ignored me and continued his flamboyant performance: "You can drink it as soon as you want, which region, which winery, which year is this wine... Ah, this is the one That vine...Awesome person, if you want to drink it, you can tell 'the origin of this wine, the climate conditions of that year', this is the master~~~" Lazy Dad expressed satisfaction Sigh, proud that he actually has enough acting skills.

When the lazy brother heard it, he immediately got excited, smiled and took a sip, moistened his throat, and shouted, "Wow, this wine is from Costco, the first rack, the second rack, and the seventh bottle in the fifth row. ! 」

The whole family laughed.

My family is weird, I just want a sip of cheap Costco red wine...  

2022.08.06

Father's Day, Man's Day and Gifts

On the same holiday night, the sloth family got together again.

After a full dinner, everyone sat on the sofa in the living room with their blood sugar elevated and insulin secreted, lazily taking their respective corners. (It could also be a wine-tasting meeting, too much of a hassle.)

Lazy Mom: "Monday, August 8th, e-commerce companies don't talk about celebrating Father's Day , but celebrating "Men's Day" . Children, what gifts do you want to give?" Lazy Mom looked at me and lazy brother.

Oh, right, I immediately said, "Yeah, lazy dad, what birthday present do you want?" I winked at the lazy brother and motioned for the lazy brother to take out the magic card credit card.

When I grow up and start making money, I am most satisfied and happy that I can spend my own money to give my parents what they want.

Lazy Dad rolled his eyes, probably thinking in his head that he finally had a good chance to beat me and my lazy brother.

Suddenly, there was a "forced" sound from the washing machine on the balcony. It turned out that lazy dad's smelly socks were washed! (Note: In the sloth's house, when we grew up, everyone washed and dried their own clothes.)

The lazy dad smiled and announced, "I know what I want for Father's Day! I want— you help me dry my socks!"

Evil, I was full of disgust, and decided to pretend that I didn't hear anything, and continued to read the book in my hand, pretending to be dead. The lazy brother retreated to the room silently and quietly, refusing to take things like drying socks as a Father's Day gift.

Lazy Dad had to look at Lazy Mom, and began to act disgustingly : "Miss, wife, you are the best to me, my gift - help me dry my socks! You are the best, you love me the most, right?" Men do everything they can to try to get the love of their wives (to help dry socks).

The lazy old man said, "I'm your wife, I'm calling your husband, but I'm not calling you dad . If I want a "Father's Day" gift, go find your dad..."

At this time, the lazy brother had long since escaped without a trace. I was on the couch, trying to shrink my body as much as possible. I don't exist, I don't exist, I don't exist...I don't want to hang out other people's disgusting smelly socks...

The lazy dad sees that his children are useless, so he can only pester the lazy mom:

"Wife, it's you who just said that it's 'Men's God's Day' ~~~ I'm your male god ! Helping your male god to dry socks, is it alright~~"

Cough, anyway, in the end, lazy dad's Father's Day/Men's Day, gift bar turtle , he finally went to dry the pile of smelly socks by himself.

2022.08.07

Life is often like this,
Ideals are often very plump, but reality is very skinny ;
The texture in life must be created by oneself and others,
As a result, the family members I love have created a sense of joy .

※Other sloth life stories, welcome to follow #sloth laughing .
※The life of a sloth, lazily in the square grid , Matters and ruffian country .