If the marquee in life cannot be seen by others, then rely on writing!

It is said that when a person is on the verge of death, the brain will broadcast the key memories of a lifetime, commonly known as "the marquee of life ".

I've never been close to death, so I don't know if that's the case. However, the latest scientific research seems to be slowly unraveling the mystery of life's marquee. When a neurosurgery team abroad was measuring brain waves for an elderly epilepsy patient, the patient had a sudden heart attack; 30 seconds before his heart stopped supplying blood to the brain, his brain wave patterns were actually similar to dreams or memories. Same ( news link ). Although it is impossible to confirm whether this is the marquee of life or not, this unexpected discovery should make people who believe in the marquee of life quite exciting!

Well, let’s make a bold assumption that the marquee in life does exist. Regrettably:

 No matter how brilliant and splendid the picture it plays, it can only be shown to you alone, and none of your dearest family members will be able to see it; after it is played, you will be dead, your files will be gone, and your life will be completely ended...

A few years ago, I was chatting with a parent of a student in a writing class, and she told me that she recently wanted to get back to writing with a pen. At first I thought she was going to develop a slash career and was about to congratulate her...

"I was recently diagnosed with breast cancer," she sighed, and I took the opportunity to swallow the words back. Then, she said earnestly:

"Our brother likes to read books, and my sister likes to read picture books. But after I found out that I had cancer, I suddenly thought: ' Isn't it strange that the two brothers and sisters have read so many other people's stories, but they have never read their mother's story? ? ”

"Although I usually tell them about my past, but they are so young, who knows if they will forget when they grow up. Should I write down my past? Even if I leave, they can remember What kind of person is my mother?"

Seriously, I've been teaching writing for so many years, but I never imagined that it would be so long in the future, much less that writing turned out to be a way for others to remember me. This mother's remarks made me rethink the value of writing, but maybe because I was still young and didn't feel the threat of the end of my life, I seldom wrote about myself except for teaching texts.

Until four years ago, due to the opportunity of the death of a junior college student due to breast cancer (again, breast cancer...), I reconsider this issue. She has only been a mother for three years, her daughter is well-behaved and her husband is considerate, and she has just started a new stage of her life, but it suddenly ends.

Put myself in her shoes, if I were her, I would definitely have a lot to say to my daughter. However, it has only been less than a year since she found out that she had breast cancer and died of the disease. Can her deteriorating body and blurry mind support her until she has finished all the words she wants to say? I think, I'm afraid I can't even explain the things in front of me, let alone the things in my past? Besides, the child is only three years old, how much of what adults can understand?

Life is very fragile, we thought death was still on the far end, maybe we turned a corner and found the end is just around the corner. Therefore, since then, I have been writing about whatever comes to my mind, such as my student days, my military career, my retirement from the military, my teaching experience, etc., as well as my travel experience, reading miscellaneous feelings, dietary notes, current affairs reviews, etc. .

It's not a problem to write about the present, but the trouble is to write about the past. I found that many precious memories I thought were impressive, but when I really wanted to capture them in words, I found that I forgot a lot of details. As far as military career is concerned, I have only been discharged from the army for more than ten years, but whenever I write relevant memories, many of my comrades' names, military regulations, idioms, terminology, place names, etc., are slowly forgotten. , you have to try hard to recall or ask the brothers who are still in contact to get the answer - how much can I remember in ten years?

At this moment, I really realize:

 It's not the scariest thing that others forget you, the scariest thing is that even you yourself forget your experience! Does your existence make sense?

After realizing this, I worked harder to write, no matter how busy I was, I always took a little time every week to extract the memory from my head as much as possible, and leave the testimony of my life.

I have no religious beliefs, and I don't think that I will go to heaven or the blissful world of the West after death; I don't have a very lofty personality, enough to leave a heart that shines through history. But at least, I have a heart that wants to write, and play the marquee of my life in advance, and play it to all the people I love and those who love me...