I save IQ with coffee

As the saying goes, the day's plan is in the morning, and my day's plan is in the coffee. How serious is my coffee addiction? When I flew to Taiwan the year before last, I had to quarantine at home for 14+7. On the first day I got home, I quickly placed an order from Carrefour to buy a variety of food including coffee. Because one of the items I ordered was out of stock, the entire order was delivered three days late. For 72 hours without coffee, I felt like I was living in hell, so weak as if my entire spine had been pulled out, snot and tears flowed, wandering around the house like a ghost, leaning against the wall to support myself... If at that moment The police saw me and would probably arrest me as a drug addict. On the day the goods arrived, I immediately dug out the coffee and had a drink, and I felt that I was finally slowly crawling out of hell.

Originally, my IQ was very low, and I was addicted to coffee. If I forgot to drink coffee one day, my IQ would plummet by hundreds, and the stupid things I did were full of tricks.

In Hong Kong, when I didn’t have time to make my own coffee, I would go to the 7/11 coffee shop on the street corner, so I got to know the 7/11 sisters thoroughly. One morning I just wanted to buy a newspaper, and my sister thought I was coming for coffee.

"It's a good deal to buy a sandwich with coffee today!"

"I don't want to drink sandwiches today." I answered seriously in exchange for the hilarious laughter of the three sisters in the store.

"You're talking nonsense, you still have a cup of coffee!"

All right! I ended up buying a newspaper, but also sandwiches and coffee. While waiting for the coffee, I saw a small biscuit for a special price of 15 Hong Kong dollars for two packs. My sister and I complained: "Hey! This biscuit is sold for eight yuan a pack, and your special price is 15 two packs, too. Expensive!" My sister looked at me with disgust and handed me the coffee.

"Turn your voice down and talk to me after your coffee!"

Before I left Hong Kong, I said goodbye to my sisters, who said thank you for bringing them so much joy!

There is a food stall on Fu Shan Street in Tai Po, Hong Kong. The proprietress is very loud and fierce. Some varieties of her family are particularly good. I often visit it. One day, I handed the bag of vegetables to the proprietress. She pointed out several dishes and asked her to weigh them. The old lady helped me put them into the bag one by one, and said, "All 86." After walking away, I vaguely heard someone shouting something from behind, until a nanny patted me on the shoulder and said, "I'm calling you from the back, did you take the food and didn't pay me?" I screamed "Ah!" I hurriedly ran back and paid for the money while apologizing. The lady boss gave me a hard look.

"You haven't had coffee in the morning? Get the dishes and leave!"

"Yeah! Yeah! You know I didn't mean it, and you shouted so loudly that the whole street heard it."

Acting like a spoiled child only got a bigger eye from the proprietress, so I had to run away from Fushan Street with my tail tucked.

I do stupid things if I don't drink coffee, and even my aunt and uncle's favorite seafood stall can't stand me. Hong Kong calls the juvenile female crabs that have not laid eggs and fertilized as juvenile crabs. I went to the market to buy fish that day. My aunt recommended that the juvenile crabs of the season were very plump, so I bought two to go home to eat, and I asked her without thinking: "Now this season, is it better to eat male or female crabs?" Before I finished speaking, I saw my aunt staring at me with eyes as big as gongs, raising her fishing tool and wanting to hit me.

"Why are you so cruel!"

"How dare you ask such a stupid question!"

I just woke up like a dream, I am really ashamed of the seafood master who has taught me for many years. I actually asked a stupid question about whether the mother of my aunt and son is a woman. I quickly apologized to the master, and my aunt rolled her eyes and helped me. Selecting Crab asked, "Have no coffee yet? Tsk, look at your ignorant look!"

The number of stupid things I've done is so overwhelming that I admit that I've managed to maintain my otherwise average IQ entirely on coffee. If one day you see me saying stupid things or doing idiotic things, there is no doubt that I have not had coffee yet, and the poor IQ doesn't know where to go.

Postscript: At the beginning of the Chinese New Year, I was chatting with Brother Hong @Red and Sister Xi @Wu Ming in LS, talking and talking, everyone is actually stupid, so I suggest that everyone write an article to compare it with each other. !