Why are you and your parents always at odds with each other? Give you a solution that you can try and Wanning - the hero's writing chain

Our relationship with our parents is a very contradictory existence.

Although they are close relatives, the so-called blood is thicker than water, not to mention the grace of parenting. These are basic common sense, everyone knows. But many times, the relationship between parents and children seems to be inseparable, and Mars hits the earth.

It's contradictory to be close relatives, but under the same roof but incompatible with each other, right? what to do?

The question of how children and male and female get along has been discussed endlessly for thousands of years. But when you look at the people around you, the problem is always there.

This problem, like the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, never seems to be resolved!

Although you have grown up, you will still be "Mom's treasure"!

Back to the beginning of the problem. From the very beginning we had a very different timeline with our parents.

Over time, as we grow up, we all have individual minds and an increasing need for personal space.

At the same time, although parents are getting older, their attitude towards their children is usually the same as in junior high school, and they still treat their children like "children". Many times there will be a situation of being "mother's baby".

Although you already have your own thoughts, it is difficult for parents to change their attitude towards their children.

This kind of mentality of parents towards their children therefore forms a big gap with the mentality that children expect their parents to have towards themselves.

In addition to the gap in mentality, there will also be a gap in the living habits of our grown-up adults and our parents, and then the problem will arise.

Thinking that winning the truth can change the other party's mind, but it's really sad

Because there is a big gap between children and their parents in terms of mentality and living habits, gradually we often find that there are many things in the home that you do not like to see, and likewise, there are many things that your parents do not like.

Soon, pointless disputes will become your daily routine.

When we are arguing, we always think that we can say that we can win the other party by reasoning. In fact, there is only one reason, and that is our own reason. What parents say is the reasoning of parents, and what you say is your reasoning, but these principles only belong to oneself but do not apply to others, so the reasoning does not make sense.

When we talk about the truth, we want to win the other party, and the purpose is to change the other party's thoughts and behaviors to meet our own requirements.

However, everyone has personal ideas, and many of these ideas are already ingrained in our minds. It takes a lot of work to change your own stereotypes, let alone other people?

Even if you say that you have won the opponent on the surface, it is actually useless, because the opponent loses in words, but will still find opportunities to fight back in behavior. The attitude of both parties will not change because of this.

Furthermore, the relationship will not get better just because you win the other party, or even worse.

Disputes just keep repeating every day, turning into a vicious circle.

The so-called "communication" is actually useless

Well, although there are frequent disputes, you still have to get along and meet each other on a daily basis. the problem still exists.

Therefore, the society teaches us to communicate, and if there is a problem, we must communicate.

The so-called "communication" is what we often hear people say: "Is there anything the family can't say? You can sit down and talk slowly about everything, and slowly pour out!"

Everyone knows these great principles of communication, but is it really useful?

Communication is to reach some consensus, hoping to find a balance point where the two coexist.

In fact, human nature is still very stubborn.

If you want everyone to change their inherent behavior and habits, the other party will have to work hard, and you will have to work hard. But to ignore these unpleasant things, you will feel very uncomfortable. At the same time, the other party is also the same, there are many things that are not pleasing to you, and they want you to change.

I believe that you have also tried to communicate with your parents. Everyone agreed to three cards or something, and agreed how to do it. In the end, it didn’t take a few months to fight back.

In short, everyone just can't change it, and they continue to feel unhappy with each other, and the problem seems to be unresolved.

It is even more necessary to speak with reservations to loved ones

Since many places are not pleasing to the eye, and the other party is unhappy in their hearts, some people think that there is no need to turn around to talk to their close relatives.

However, can we really speak straight without reservation?

Usually just adding fuel to the fire!

It's easy to offend people by telling the truth. Not everyone can accept the truth, especially the parents who raised you.

Human dignity is very important but fragile, it is easy to be trampled on, and telling the truth is the easiest to offend people.

Don't think that using "speak up" and "confession" can wrap up and beautify the speech without reservation.

You need to be more reserved when talking to your loved ones, because your relationship with them is forever, and you will meet in the future, my friend!

The way to avoid disputes is to avoid conflicting times

"It is good to meet each other, but it is difficult to live together", which has withstood the test of time and is an unchanging truth in history.

Repeating the same method will only repeat the same result.

Sometimes, what you want is not necessarily what works.

Since it doesn't seem to work to talk about the truth, communicate and speak directly, what is the last word of getting along with parents?

Really followed the sentence, "don't live together".

Living differently doesn't mean you don't care about your parents anymore.

After moving out, the time we spend together should be more important than quality.

Also, the most important thing is to give to the household, and it is best to give enough to the household.

Especially for us Asians, parents are very concerned about the fact that their children are given to the family.

Living in different places avoids unnecessary disputes, and giving home is a way to "communicate" with our parents!

Money is king! Remember, after moving out, be sure to give home on time every month.

Summarize

While you can't choose who your parents are, you can choose to have a comfortable relationship with them.

Find a method that is comfortable for both parties to deal with. This method does not necessarily have to be agreed by both parties. The key point is whether this method is effective and feasible.

"Different living" is a good way. Of course, households must also be sufficient.

Based on my experience of observing the people and things around me, this solution guarantees everything is safe. Friends in need may wish to try!

In the eyes of parents in Eastern society, giving home is a very important thing to them. It can be said that as long as you give enough at home, half of the deep-seated problems with your parents can be solved easily.

But why don't many children in the West give their parents home? What are their thoughts?

If you like it, the next article can be written about Westerners who don't give their parents this age, it should be very interesting!

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