Adventure

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Author: Katherine863 (from Douban)

Source: https://www.douban.com/note/805544321/

T and I met at a Beijing Wudaokou Cultural Salon. At that time, the "Pickup" space was still operating, and T was one of the stalwarts. Shiwu was initiated by returnees from several famous schools about 10 years ago, and the operators have changed several times, but it has always maintained its ideological and aesthetic pioneers, and has gathered many young people with ideas - most of them are students, artists, Charity people, or freelancers, but there are also office workers, and I am one of them. In the library where I picked up things, under the slightly dim light on Friday night, I took the initiative to say hello to T, saying that I had seen him and remembered him. T smiled, he is a person who can relax people by laughing. He said: I have also seen you and have an impression of you, but I usually don't take the initiative to talk to girls. Encouraged by his smile, I said, "It seems that girls will take the initiative to talk to you?" T was really amused by me this time, he laughed, showing eight teeth, looking a little simple and honest, but still clear and temperamental . He said, "No, I'm not that handsome." I caught on to this and praised him for being handsome, so we added WeChat.

At that time, I had already decided on a job that I liked, in the education industry, to be precise, studying abroad. I advise students who want to go abroad to select schools, write personal statements, resumes and letters of recommendation. This is a job that will amplify the Matthew effect, my boss M said the whole world is in Matthew, and I rarely feel guilty about my work because he said so. ——Looking at my work from the perspective of Marx’s theory, the amount of contracts I handle every year is about 1.2 million, while my income is relatively insignificant, and the rest will not go into the boss’s pocket, I know Part of the cost will be dissipated in the management of this large educational institution, and the other part is the company's customer acquisition cost. In short, developed capital operation.

If public education is the last fig leaf for the division between the rich and the poor, we education and training institutions are anxiety makers, contributing day and night to the process of involution. I'm not guilty though - I'm not a believer in the unreliable historical tale of "the muzzle is raised a centimeter." I also have a crush on M, which sometimes gets intense and makes me miserable. I mentally rehearse the answers to some of the questions as if someone were interviewing me, like, when did I start liking M.

Honest answer: "When he showed me his Power Play."

Literary, dishonest answer: "Before I knew him. And he, before he really liked me, didn't like me."

In fact who has power is often dynamic and difficult to judge. I'm sure I've made M miserable once, and even inadvertently. But that doesn't save me from the pain and loneliness I once felt for him.