Postscript to the Seven Days Book｜The illusion of words, the gears that turn on

When I was in school, I wrote good essays, and sometimes my teachers would read them out as model essays. Later, I joined some student clubs and received negligible royalties.

But I never really accepted that I liked writing.

For a long time, I have been agreeing with another voice in my head: "Writing is for getting essay scores, don't waste time writing nonsense", "It can't be used to make a living, so don't be pretentious", "If you really want to write, then write well, be a writer, and publish a book."

In short, I can't write calmly, and I always have some hesitations. When I was a primary school psychology counselor, I wrote novels for a while, because my therapy sessions were all in the afternoon, and there was nothing to do in the morning. Moreover, my "office" was a teaching room, and the network signal was almost non-existent, which was very suitable for writing. After leaving the primary school and going to a public hospital, I was so busy that I gradually stopped writing.

After the epidemic ended, my anxiety began to manifest itself in physical symptoms, so I went to see a psychologist. She worked with me for more than a year, and I was finally able to truly face the fact that "I just love writing." I can like things that have nothing to do with money and power, and those things are the reason why I live well in this world.

I came to a draw with the "spirits" in my mind that had controlled me, and finally accepted my own existence.

I can exist without being "capable" or "promising" or anything at all.

So I finally walked for a day and was able to tell my counselor that I actually like writing and I want to start writing again, just to express my feelings. Just like knitting a sweater that I will never wear, just feel happy while knitting. At that time, my favorite blog "Understand Blog" happened to interview @张彔平, and I knew about this place for the first time. I quickly registered for Matters and started writing about my career experiences.

I had just started writing the story about the alcoholic handsome liar when I saw the activity of Seven Days Book.

Oh, isn’t this fate? How does the saying go, when you want to do something, the whole universe will come to help you.

It’s only half an hour a day for seven days, so it should be possible.

Then I started writing.

When I first saw the daily topic, I felt like I didn’t have anything special to write about, but since it was free writing, I could just write whatever came to my mind without any pressure.

There is a very popular episode of the podcast Speaking of Psychology called "How to get unstuck with Adam Alter". In it, when talking about how to break through the bottleneck, an interesting statement was mentioned: creation can be said to be a bottle, the good stuff is at the bottom, and the garbage is floating on the top. So, when you are stuck in the bottleneck, it is better to write a piece of garbage at the beginning, and when the garbage is dumped out, the good stuff at the bottom will come out.

I think that the Seven Days Book is just such a process of starting the gears, a process of taking out the garbage first.

Once I really start writing, I actually have something to say. I type so fast that I can't stop.

In addition, the sense of community and inclusiveness of this community is so touching.

I was just planning to write, but I received a lot of praise and comments on the first day. On the third day, I received a reward from @斜阳映酒旗, which really made my blood boil. Later, I received rewards from @Matty and @Angela Chen .

That afternoon, I went outside for a long walk before I calmed down.

In my entire writing career, I have never received so much and so intensive support.

I am very grateful for this event and a special thank you to all the people who have encouraged me.

However, I found that for me, this kind of personal writing is a process of digging into myself. Many forgotten things have come to my mind in the past few days. I feel that this intensive internal dialogue is a challenge to my ability to control my emotions. Or for people who write frequently, it is not like this. For me, it is like entering a kind of fantasy world of words.

Finally, @斜阳映酒旗can you finish "林梢"? I really love it.