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She said that what you are doing now can be described in one sentence: "There is no love in the name, and there is no name in the love."

They looked at me with a smirk, and pointed out with a smile, is this some kind of dog-blooded family drama between the three in the palace? I'm full of question marks?

Indeed, that person who has a title, whom I agree with and has been affirmed by others, but I don't love him, I only have responsibility for him and the face that I don't want to let everything go to waste, I face it negatively. He gave me all the tasks and requirements. I didn't give up on him nor on myself, but I didn't want to try any more. During a journey where I couldn't see any turning point, I fell into a trance from time to time, in the blank of events and events, What I felt was a long daze and absolute loneliness. I was like the one left behind, sitting beside the bustling street with no one to stop for me.

And what about my love? Although I don't have a name, I enjoy the moment of joy he brings to me. He makes me feel that I am still alive, still valuable and worthy of recognition. I light up the spark in the eyes of the other party, at the expense of burning myself, in At that moment, it was as if I had absolute power to live and kill, and I was always the winner, but soon enough, the guilt would grab me, shake me hard, stop me from intoxicating , let me stop interfering in other people's lives, let me put down the sword and knife in my hand, and the happiness in my eyes, although I love him, but he can't stay in my life for a long time, I always have to return to my most As normal, back to the other side of him.

I like this analogy, Yuan Pei and Xiao San, although they are not human, but this is my truest feeling in these two situations, I am a person who does not dare to bet on love without a name, and I even doubt myself Without love, I can feel longing, vulnerability, warmth, security and intimacy, I can also taste loneliness, helplessness, fear, daze and pain, but these have nothing to do with love, these are my deepest doubts about myself, I just want to be comfortable, to be desperate, to believe in some kind of fluke, to think that I can throw myself into the unknown again and again, and maybe this time I will be caught by the hand that was meant to be, and I finally To be able to stop, to stop this long punishment, to be able to leave this street where no one cares about me, to survive the guilt that always grabs me, I can breathe full oxygen into my lungs and be alive again.