小鹿斑比
小鹿斑比

想記錄那些閱讀過後有感觸的笑點與那些其實不知道也無所謂的小事,雁過可能會留影,也可能被拔毛,也可能成為某人眼底映照下的雁過也,正傷心,卻是舊時相識...,每個人看事情的角度都不同,所以形成了各色的風景,就看看我眼底的風景吧。

For jokes with wrong ideas, read "Lin Guang Ji" / "Ministry of Errors"

Happy is a day, unhappy is also a day, why not choose to be happy for a day╹◡╹

Xiaolu finally introduced the last part of Xiaolin Guangji! ! !
I'm moved..., finally..., the last part of Xiao Lin Guangji is "The Ministry of Falsehood", which is full of wrong ideas. Next, please follow the gaze of cats in the morning to see these ancients interesting things~

(In the morning, the cat patiently let the deer take a photo, wait for the deer to find the mobile phone, turn on the camera, take a normal picture first, and then switch to 2X and finally 5X, the cat is so calm and waits for me to finish shooting before leaving~)

Stay still, have very good modelling skills

"Laughing Forest" / "Ministry of Errors"
Pretentiously addressing a family of father and son servants, specializing in big words, often calling himself the court name.
One day, a friend came to see him. His father was out of town. When he met his eldest son, he said, "Father, the king, has driven out."
When asked about Lingtang, the second son said again, "My lady is having a feast in the back garden."
You see that the words are arrogant and leave in anger.
When he met his father on the way, he told him what his son had said.
The father said, "Who said that?"
The servant said: "This is what the prince and the concubine said."
His friend became more and more annoyed, and he beat him.
His father hurriedly persuaded, "The Qing family is not worried, look at the widow's face."
(In modern society, one thing is definitely better than before, that is, it was not acceptable to say that I was Aijia or Ben Gong, it was an offense, but now I can talk about it casually~ Now we can sign the contact book and write that I have read it! But children may will protest..)

If there are men who go out to look in the mirror, the wife will buy a comb and ask her to bring it back.
The husband asked about his status, and the wife pointed to the crescent moon to show him.
After the husband and the goods were completed, he suddenly recalled the words of his wife, and because he saw that the moon was full, he bought a mirror and brought it back with him.
His wife Zhaozhi scolded, "If you don't buy a comb, how can you get a concubine back?" They argued twice.
When the mother heard the persuasion, she suddenly saw the mirror and looked into the cloud: "My son has the heart to spend money, how can I beg an old wife?"
Complaining to each other, they went to sue.
The official went to detain him, and when he saw the mirror, he panicked: "You only got a card, how can you go out on an extra mission to catch the violation?"
When the trial was over, the mirror was placed on the case, and the official said in anger: "The husband and wife are not in harmony, why should the central government ask the township official to speak for the sake of it!"
(.... This incident tells us that it is very important to read and have scientific knowledge...)

keep the pose

The liar said, "There is a drum in a certain monastery here, it is dozens of perimeters in size, and the sound can be heard for hundreds of miles."
Another person nearby said, "There is an ox in this land, its head is in the south of the river and its tail is in the north of the river, and its feet weigh more than ten thousand catties. Isn't it a miracle?"
People don't believe it. The man said, "If you don't have this big cow, how can you get this big skin and slow down this big drum?"
(It makes sense ㄟ! There is no such a big cow, how can I paste such a big drum)

A big bathtub makes a liar say to people: "There is a foot basin in a certain temple here, which can make thousands of people bathe together." Those who hear it do not believe it.
A person next to him said, "This is a common occurrence, so why is it surprising? It's surprising to hear the news here."
People asked, "What's the matter?"
He said, "There is a bamboo forest in a certain temple, which grew several million zhang in less than three years. Now it is not able to go up to the sky, but it has grown down from the sky. Isn't it a miracle?"
The man said, "If there are no such long bamboos, what kind of bamboo do you ask him to put around his big foot basin?"
(I remember reading a book about the adventures of a bragging baron when I was in elementary school. Although I knew it was fake, I still read it very happily 0.0)

True Lies Some people are accustomed to lying, and their servants will be rounded up every generation.
One day, he said to someone, "My well was blown to the neighbor's house by the strong wind yesterday."
Everyone thought it had never existed, so Pu Yuanzhi said, "It's true. The well of my house is close to the fence of the neighbor's house. Last night, the wind was strong, and the fence was blown over the well, but it was like a well blowing to the neighbor's house. ”
One day, he said to someone, "Someone shot down two wild geese with a bowl of noodle soup on their head."
The crowd was amazed again, and Pu Yuan said, "This is also true. My master was eating noodle soup in the courtyard, and suddenly a wild goose fell down, and the head of the goose was falling into the bowl. Could it be that the head of the goose is wearing noodle soup."
One day, he said to someone, "The Han family has a tent that covers the sky and the earth along the edge, but there are no gaps." The servant raised his eyebrows and said, "My master is telling me how to cover up this lie. ”
(There is a paragraph in the cross talk about picking up the jacket, similar to this joke, it is very worth watching~)

In the face of such a professional performance, I can't justify it without a snack~

I finally got rid of Xiaolin Guangji.... I will never do such a long-term project again...
Tomorrow let's continue talking about the books we read recently~




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