艾莎解結
艾莎解結

🌷「艾莎」為您「解」開心「結」🌷 想要解開職場千千結,你需要深諳各種江湖套路,又受過專業心理諮商訓練的艾莎解結。 ~願人人都有選擇人生的自由~ To be free group-TBFG 我的個人網站:elsajj.com 粉專:艾莎解結-跨界生涯顧問

This career consultation is like a soul torture: you have come to consult and you still look like an interview

Communication is really not easy. Sometimes, it's not that the other party refuses to listen to you, but the other way around. When the other party wants to hear your real voice, you are so used to wearing a mask that you don't know how to remove it.

Once, there was a consultation case that impressed me a lot, so let's call him Mr. S.

<The contents mentioned have been appropriately deleted to protect personal privacy>


S has always made up his mind that he wants to be an engineer who writes programs, and his studies are also related departments, but because of his very talkative and lively personality, and his resume is a bunch of distinguished club presidents, class representatives, event directors and other qualifications, so that every time During the interview process, 3 out of 6 companies told him that his characteristics are more suitable for a project management position, and out of the 6 companies he interviewed, 4 companies were selected.

He came to me for consultation, and the main question was: "I want to improve my interview skills, and is there any other way to improve my resume?"

Then S told me that I felt that my interview process was very stuck.


Hearing that he had already got offers from several companies made me wonder, that kind of feeling is very much like a mother who has already given birth to two children, and then said very worriedly: "I heard that it is really painful to give birth to a child. Do? I'm afraid I can't stand it", this is full of disobedience.

If you have already got the offer, interview skills and revised resume, it is no longer a problem to worry about.


I ask S to introduce myself first. In addition to the resume, I also want to know the other party's oral expressions. S enters the situation immediately, and the process is ready as soon as you hear it. It can be said to be perfect. Even the questions that the interviewer may want to ask have been explained in the pre-introduction.

I haven't even started to ask him, S seems to have a telepathy, and I finished my own questioning and self-answering.

Well, since it went so well, I asked him the first question: "Why do you want to be a software engineer?" Since all the jobs that go to the interview are software engineers, this question should be the easiest.


His answer was: "Because I feel that if I am a PM directly now, and I don't know programming languages, I will not be able to communicate effectively with the engineering department, and communication is an important driving force for the smooth progress of the project... So I should Let’s start with being a software engineer. Moreover, the salary of engineers is generally higher.”


Sounds like a good answer, right?

As a newbie, the answer is very smooth, but there are two very paradoxical fallacies in the middle:

1. This answer sounds more like: "How to be a good PM", and I asked why you want to be an engineer (A)? But the answer is: in order to do a good job in project management PM (B), so first become an engineer?
2. A and B are parallel units, no one is "entry". Generally speaking, the starting salary of A should be higher than that of B. In order to do a good job of B with a lower starting salary, do you need to start from A with a higher starting salary? And where is the inevitable causal relationship between these two positions?


S has been stuck on this issue for a long time. I can't tell you why you want to be a software engineer. Later, he said, because I don't think the ability to write programming is very good at present, but I want to prove that I can!! I know that my characteristics are more suitable for being a PM, and I will work hard in this direction... Barabara...

I said, "You are very fluent in answering questions. I believe that most interviewers will like it, so even if you think your programming skills are not high, you are still accepted by many schools, right?"


"But, can you stop treating me as an interviewer now? I'm your consultant, not the interviewer."

In fact, S's response is relatively good compared to most newcomers. It's just that I don't know why, during the conversation, I always had a very strong feeling that the other party was "acting" this conversation.


Simple way of speaking Simple progressive emotions Please omit you are not an actor Don't design those plots

Xue Zhiqian "Actor"


"I know everyone says you're a good project manager and you're doing well in interviews, but what I really want to know is: your own, your own ideas?

Do you really like and want to be a project manager?
Or are you just saying you fit in?
What about the software engineer who was supposed to apply? Where did you go? '


"Stop treating me as an interviewer
Stop treating me as an interviewer. You are not here for the interview. I am your consultant. I am here to get to know you. '


I repeated these words several times during the forgetting process,

Hearing this, S finally calmed down and fell silent.

(S has been an actor for about 10 minutes before, like a monologue, and didn't listen to any questions I asked at all)


Communication is really not easy. Sometimes, it's not that the other party refuses to listen to you, but the other way around. When the other party wants to hear your real voice, you are so used to wearing a mask that you don't know how to remove it.


Later, through another exercise, he found the real reason why he wanted to be an engineer.



After the consultation is over.

S told me that he had already found a job, but he didn't need to consult again.
But this time is very special. For the first time, I feel that not only the blind spots are broken, but also the feeling of being pulled open layer by layer. Then he was full of curiosity about me and asked me about my background.

"I have also looked for consultants before, but they all look at me from the perspective of the company or enterprise. Only you, Teacher Aisha, besides telling me the perspective of the enterprise, you are more concerned about me as a person. I feel very relieved. !

"Teacher, can I make an appointment with you next time?"


Originally, I thought that the intensity of the consultation was a bit strong. I wonder if the other party can stand it? Such a direct torture of the soul?

Being a consultant is a very labor-intensive, mentally and physically demanding job.
It is necessary to study cases or formulate consulting strategies in advance, and then record them later, and think about how to improve and how to help each other in a structured way?

There were 7 consecutive cases in one day, and I didn't even have time to eat. He just kept talking → listening intently to others → using his brain to figure out how to solve his problem → he kept responding , and after it was over, he just felt that he was going to die.


But whenever there is a moment of feedback from such a case, or when I clearly feel that my skills are evolving and it really helps the other party, I still feel it is worthwhile.

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