一滴學英文（三）反饋 | Feedback

學英文筆記及感想。

1.How I felt

I felt hesitant to give feedback in the group at times, possibly because I am a determined person. I may not always express my feelings directly, especially when pointing out aspects of a person's behaviour. However, when it comes to giving feedback to friends or family, I am always descriptive. I will provide details about the behaviour and its impact on me. As a result, feelings are personal and cannot be true or false, good or bad, but can only be communicated honestly or dishonestly. When providing feedback, you are speaking for yourself, not for others, so always use "I" statements. For instance, "I feel," rather than "Everyone gets upset when you..."

2. What did I learn?

Personally, I believe that think and feel statements are distinct. "I feel" is a phrase I occasionally use to express a thought, an opinion, or a belief. Feel statements, on the other hand, refer to internal states. As a result, feel statements are subjective and cannot be true or false, good or bad, but must be communicated honestly or dishonestly. I also learned that when I give feedback, I am speaking for myself, not for others, so always use "I" statements, such as "I feel," rather than "Everyone gets upset when you......."

Professionally, I learned how to effectively provide feedback. When giving feedback, focus on specific behaviours rather than generalities; describe rather than evaluate the behaviour that can be changed; be concrete and aware of how much the person can receive now; giving feedback is not giving advice; pay attention to events that are happening in the present moment. Furthermore, I discovered my own feedback style. I am skilled at providing specific feedback in which I can point out specific actions and behaviours. I will be able to respond immediately following the event. I let others decide whether or not they want to change their behaviour. Nonetheless, I need to improve my skills in direct expression of emotion, descriptive feedback, and non-evaluative feedback.

3. What would I do differently?

I will describe my own feelings and use the "I statement" when providing feedback. I'll watch and describe the behaviour. I will refrain from exaggeration ("you always..."), labelling ("you are stupid"), and passing judgement. When I receive feedback, I will pay close attention to the speaker and take notes. For example, I will ask clarifying questions. "Could you provide an example?" I'll try to get feedback from group members about how it affected them. Instead of becoming defensive, I will concentrate on what is being said and open myself up. I will respond to the feedback if necessary.

圖源：pixabay