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【Normal People — 情慾交織的靈魂伴侶 渴望被愛的普通人】

GYNESS081
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BBC Three和Hulu聯手製作的《Normal People》終於在4月26日正式啓播。這部改編自愛爾蘭新晉作家Sally Rooney的同名小說,講述一對愛爾蘭少年少女Connell和Marianne從高中到大學畢業期間,離離合合的感情故事。全劇12集,約半小時一集,相當簡潔到位地表達小說的精髓。此書在2018年出版後,已大受好評,被The Times稱為最佳年度小說,獲得The 2018 Costa Novel Award,連前美國總統奧巴馬及新晉名模Kaia Gerber都推介此書,Guardian稱之為新一代年輕人的寫照。故此劇集一出,廣受大眾討論。

劇集的宣傳海報,Paul Mescal飾演的Connell和Daisy Edgar-Jones飾演的Marianne。
愛爾蘭新晉作家Sally Rooney的第二本小說《Normal People》


故事背景主要發生在愛爾蘭近郊的小鎮Sligo和首都Dublin,男女主角表面上是兩個截然不同的人,但他們都對於自我認同感到迷惘,經常質疑自己是個心理有缺陷的人,對世界的感知與其他人不一樣,只有對方明白自己,兩人之間的張力漸漸地互相吸引。他們互相感覺到兩人之間微妙的化學作用,在獨處時非常坦然自若,尤其在做愛時,與其他人交往的感覺不同,只有對方才能讓自己安心和消除憂慮。

主角兩人的家庭背景及社會階級的差別,使他們的處世態度略為不同。Marianne家景富裕,父母皆是律師,與家人關係惡劣。從小缺乏親人的愛,令她經常質疑自己是一個不討人喜愛(unloveable)及冷感(coldness)的人,對社會規範感到厭惡,內心建起一道牆,以堅強高傲的外表,隔絕外界的騷擾;相反,Connell成長在單親勞動家庭,對父親一無所知,母親在Marianne家中做鐘點清潔工人,中學校內人際關係非常好。但同時以自己為勞動階級及貧窮而感到自卑,非常介意外界如何看待他,經常反思自我感受,長期感到困惑和難受。唯一同通點是兩人天資聰穎,成績名列前矛。兩人走在一起時,所有事情好像迎刃而解,仿佛對方是自己遺失掉的拼圖,只有對方才能令自己圓滿。



Well, I like you, Marianne says.

Connell and Marianne in high school


C: You know you were saying the other day you like me. Did you mean like as a friend, or what? 
M: No, not just as a friend.

因為Marianne突如其來的一句「我喜歡你」,他們的人生開始交織。Marianne的率直迎來Connell的一吻和親密關係的開始。然而由於Connell非常介意朋輩對他的看法,害怕他們的關係被發現後,瞬間失去一切而深感壓力,故此兩人秘密地交往,在校內假裝不認識對方。而Marianne理解他的疑慮,視之為兩人最親密的秘密。

Even in memory she will find this moment unbearably intense, and she’s aware of this now, while it’s happening. She has never believed herself fit to be loved by any person. But now she has a new life, of which this is the first moment, and even after many years have passed she will still think: Yes, that was it, the beginning of my life.

然而在畢業晚會的籌款活動中,Marianne被當眾非禮,Connell憤然地挺身而出表達對她的關心,使她第一次感受到被愛,猶如獲得重生。可是週末過後,面對朋輩對他們的嘲諷,令他深感痛苦。由於害怕失去朋輩的愛戴,而決定邀請Rachel出席畢業晚會。Connell告之Marianne此決定後,Marianne斷絕與他來往,不再上學而長留家中溫習高考。The Debs當晚Connell一直心不在焉,在後段時Eric告訴他全部人都知道他們交往的事,而事實上NO ONE CARED。Connell為之驚訝,隨後打給Marianne哭訴內心感受,但她沒有接聽電話。這是他們第一次分開。


I’ve missed you, she says.

Connell and Marianne during college life.


Back home, Connell’s shyness never seemed like much of an obstacle to his social life, because everyone knew who he was already, and there was never any need to introduce himself or create impressions about his personality…Now he has a sense of invisibility, nothingness, with no reputation to recommend him to anyone. Though his physical appearance has not changed, he feels objectively worse-looking than he used to be. He has become self-conscious about his clothes.
…Connell initially felt a sense of crushing inferiority to his fellow students, as if he had upgraded himself accidentally to an intellectual level far above his own…He understands now that his classmates are not like him…he’ll probably never really understand them, and he knows they will never understand him.

Connell在高考以滿分的成績考入名校Trinity College Dublin的英文系。然而從鄉村小鎮走進大城市生活,由中學的萬人迷瞬間變成孤身一人,使內斂的他感到焦慮不安,久久未能融入生活。Marianne在同校修讀History and Politics,Connell報考Trinity也是她的提議,只有她留意到他最用心的科目是英文,便鼓勵他一同考入名校。在大學的她則變成萬人迷,她敢於發言令朋輩十分欣賞,但她始終不知道自己想要甚麼,對未來沒有方向。

C: I feel guilty for all the stuff I said to you. About how bad it would be if anyone found out. Obviously that was more in my head than anything. I mean, there was no reason why people would care. But I kind of suffer from anxiety with these things…but I think I projected some anxiety onto you, if that makes sense.
M: I forgive you.
C: Thank you. I think I did learn from it. And hopefully I have changed, you know, as a person. But honestly, if I have, it’s because of you.

兩人再次相遇是在大學一年級的一個派對。一次偶然機會下,受到同學的邀請出席派對,Connell打算嘗試結識新朋友,此時竟然重遇Marianne。兩人媚媚道出分開後的心聲和感受,冰釋前嫌,再次成為好友。兩人嘗試保持朋友的關係,但每次見面都有強烈的感覺,Connell更躺開心扉向Marianne致歉。兩人漸漸重拾昔日親密的關係,發現對方始終是那個與眾不同的人,是唯一感到自在的人。

日夜在圖書館看文學書籍,不甘於在課堂上泛泛而談。(好Charm)


…he finds he like to be thought of as intelligent, if only because it makes his interactions with other people more legible…

Connell一直遊走在學業與兼職之間,無暇建立自己的人際關係,勉強地融入Marianne的有錢朋友圈子。然而源於社會經濟階級有別,他與城市人的想法和行徑大為不同,使他察覺到與Marianne的階級距離。每當Marianne對他說「只要你想,我可以做任何事情」,都令他更感自卑和困惑。直至Connell無法應付在Dublin的暑假生活,向Mariannne表示要回家三個月時,兩人產生誤會而第二次分開。


暑假期間兩人在Sligo的超級市場碰過面,在開學後又曾相約在咖啡店聊天,但雙方心中仍然有隔閡。他認為兩人來自不同的階層,生活在截然不同的世界,不能正常地相處;而她則認爲自己正如家人所言有心理缺陷,以及她的個人性辟好,令Connell不能接受自己。另一方面,他們亦知道對方在自己心中是十分重要,相處的感覺和方式與其他人不同。


Sorry for calling you, it’s the only number I knew off the top of my head, he says.

兩人在劇中討論金錢和階級的看法。


M: I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I don’t know why I can’t be like normal people?
C: In what way ?
M: I don’t know why I can’t make people love me. I think there was something wrong with me when I was born.

因一次遇劫,Connell再次聯絡Marianne,爭執期間他說起上年暑假的事及心中的困惑,才發現兩人誤解了對方的意思,然而此時兩人各有伴侶,只好維持好友關係。兩人同時得到獎學金,Connell的經濟問題得以解決,而Helen的存在對他而言是成為正常人的指引,相反Marianne則對Jamie有點厭惡,他的性格和態度令她吃不消。在一次暑假歐遊之旅,Marianne與Jamie吵架後便分開了。Connell陪伴在Marianne身邊時她說起與家人的關係,Connell才知道她是這樣看自己。另外,書中巧妙地描述Connell對他當時生命中三位女人的相處方式:對母親,他是例行公事的態度;對Helen,他會打電話和傳訊息,普通情侶的對話;對Marianne,他則事無大小都記錄下來再以電郵通訊,希望將所有感覺和想法告之她,顯示她在他心中的重要位置。


Is the world such an evil place, that love should be indistinguishable from the basest and most abusive forms of violence?

Marianne and Lukas are playing “the game”.


There’s always been something inside her that men have wanted to dominate, and their desire for domination can look so much like attraction, even love…all with the same aim of subjugating some force in her personality…Would every stage of her life continue to reveal itself as the same thing, again and again, the same remorseless contest for domination?

Final year的一年,Marianne選擇前往瑞典留學,期間與Connell保持好友關係,不間斷地以電郵通信。自從與Jamie分開後,Marianne只保持與Joanna和Connell聯絡,如Joanna所言,其他的都是損友,只會傷害大家感情。在陌生的國度,她遇上藝術家性格的攝影師Lukas,並協議進行「遊戲」。Marianne在「遊戲」期間不可以說話和眼神接觸,輸了要受懲罰,直至性交完結為止。Lukas會不斷對她說: You’re worthless. You’re nothing.之類的難堪說話,Marianne認為自己有受虐傾向而喜歡和接受,但下意識又不是如此。這一段記錄Marianne尋找自我內心慾望與掙扎。她回顧自己對家庭狀況的處理,一直以來都默不作聲地承受一切,但她深知越沈默冷靜換來更大傷害,這也是她漸漸渴望被虐的根源。


I just don’t have a lot of people who I really click with, I struggle with that, he says.


同年,兩人的高中同學自殺,在喪禮上兩人片刻重遇。Helen對於兩人的曖昧關係感到傷心,而提出分手。Connell痛失童年玩伴又與女友分手的情況下,陷入嚴重抑鬱的狀態,在前室友鼓勵下接受心理輔導。承接Marianne的尋找自我內心情感,這一段是Connell透過與治癒師對話而面對自己複雜的情感。他在治癒師引導下,由頭訴說自己對童年玩伴、Marianne、兩地生活的差異等複雜情感。書中細膩地描述Connell的抑鬱狀態,及其內心的各種糾結。他一直在做自己認為應該做的事,但每次的結果都令他感到痛苦和失落。劇中後尾加插一段Marianne隔空陪伴Connell睡覺的情節,他一睜開眼看見她的一幕,令筆者十分感動。人生兜兜轉轉,還是這個人最明瞭自己,只有對方才令自己安心。


We’ll be OK, she says.


C: I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.
M: Everything will be different and me too. But we’ve done so much good for one another.
C: You know I love you. I’m never going to feel the same way for another else.
M: I know.
C: I’ll go.
M: I’ll stay and we’ll be OK.

最後一節講述兩人在Bachelor degree畢業的發展抉擇。Connell在教授(書中是編輯朋友)的鼓勵下,報讀New York University的一年制MFA Creative Writing Program,進一步發展寫作之路;而Marianne則希望留在Dublin發展。若然Marianne沒有表白,若然Connell沒有到都柏林,一切都會不一樣。經歷了那麼多次離合,他們的情感關係密不可分,誰也不能代替對方在心中的位置,縱使將來有機會再次分開,但對方還是那個最重要的人。

All these years they’ve been like two little plants sharing the same plot of soil, growing around one another, contorting to make room, taking certain unlikely positions…He brought her goodness like a gift and now it belongs to her. Meanwhile his life opens out before him in all directions at once. They’ve done a lot of good for each other. People can really change one another.

現代版的《傲慢與偏見》

有評論者認為這是現代版的《傲慢與偏見》(Pride and Prejudice),筆者也有同感,Marianne的傲慢與Connell的偏見,使他們早期的關係撲朔迷離。他們的內心世界非常複雜,因為階級背景而缺乏自信,以及原生家庭導致渴望被愛的情感,令兩人之間的關係更難捨難離。亦有評論者認為Connell成為時下大眾女性的理想對象,一位無時無刻都關心Marianne感受的女性主義紳士,但事實上是否如此?他們每次分開的誘因都是Connell引起:害怕被杯葛而選擇Rachel、因負擔不起生活費又自卑得不敢住在Marianne家中而離開、因Marianne的性辟好而逃避面對兩人的關係、升學而離開愛爾蘭。Marianne一直是配合角色,甚少爭取他留在自己身邊,無論Connell的決定如何,正如她經常對Connell說:I would do whatever you wanted to,書中尾段的內心讀白亦表示她一直在他的權力之下,但她願意並感到快樂,有何不可?若果將故事架構放在亞洲社會角度,可能讀者觀眾們會指罵他是渣男,是可惡的父權支配者,而忽視了他們之間的微妙化學作用。異性戀情人間的權力關係,是互相拉扯的化學作用,行為上他看似主導關係的發展,但事實上他亦不能失去她的情感支配,她是他的精神支柱,別人無法替代的唯一。

唯美的影像表達和細膩的內心演技

這部劇集絕對稱得上完美表達書中重要情節及人物關係的拉扯,導演Lenny Abrahamson以一貫帶有愛爾蘭味道的唯美拍攝手法,細緻地表達人物的內心世界,不論剪接或舖排,絲毫沒有冗長的部分。Paul Mescal及Daisy Edgar-Jones的演技值得稱讚,劇中有大量裸露及做愛場面,兩人表現自若,尤其Paul是首次出演電視拍攝製作,他的害羞和內心掙扎的情感表達非常真摯。製作團隊擬開拍第二季《Normal People》,而Paul Mescal及Daisy Edgar-Jones亦樂意再次擔任主角。筆者十分期待!

P.S

Paul Mescal及Daisy Edgar-Jones因此劇人氣急升,短短三個星期,他們的Social media platforms已經超過30萬followers。最令人驚奇的是有網民開設名為Connell's chain的IG賬號,成為網民及媒體間的熱話,連Paul每次接受訪問時都被問起這件事,他每次的反應都是哭笑不得。其實書中有提及過這條Connell’s chain,

…under which Marianne recognises the glimmer of an unadorned silver neckchain he’s had since school. …‘Argos chic’, which made Marianne cringe, though she couldn’t tell which friend she was cringing for.

但根據網民的角度,每當sex的場面Connell’s chain便成了另類的主角,post captions都是令人捧腹大笑的精髓,其中一句是 ‘it’s so corrupt and sexy.’。(其實是Connell與Marianne談論金錢的看法。)










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