Reflections on Reading | Be an Eye-moving and Brain-moving Reader

Although reading is like a journey of absorbing new knowledge and ideas, there are many moments that always make me slow down to think and chew, perhaps to find resonance and thank the author for presenting my thoughts in precise words. It may also be that they do not agree with the author's point of view and repeatedly confirm whether there is a misunderstanding. In this era when almost everyone can publish a book, the words in the book no longer fully represent authority, and even have to bear the risk of being criticized and inspected. Although the threshold for writing a book has been lowered, the author's heart may need to be trained to be strong enough.

There are views that I disagree with in the two books I read recently, and I believe that the author may not have found the crux of the problem when he wrote the text until now. Everyone has many ideas due to their own growth background and the influence of many factors. and I think reading is a good way to train thinking ability. We don’t need to accept every author’s argument in a comprehensive way, and don’t unconditionally take his words as sacred because of the author’s high reputation . It is also important to respect your own feelings and values.

Now I will talk about the views I disagree with in the two books. Of course, there is no right or wrong, it is just a difference of views!

Event description one:

The mother (the author) originally promised to let the child eat pasta, but when the father came home, he saw that the servant had already cooked several dishes, so he said that there was no need to cook the pasta that the child wanted to eat. The mother agreed with the father, so The child blamed the mother's fault and cried for 20 minutes, but the mother said that she could not change her behavior just because the child was crying, and also said that the child was making trouble unreasonably, as long as it was quiet by the child's side, it ended with the child apologizing to the mother .

my thoughts:

Is it okay for adults to talk about things they promise children? Is it unreasonable to cry when the child cannot accept it? I think it is adults who go back on their word. How can the conclusion be that the direction cannot be changed just because the child is crying? It's the adults who change their minds and practices, isn't it?

I think it is easy for adults to change their minds temporarily based on some reasons. It may be a waste of food, it may be a detour, etc., but they have never thought about consulting their children or thinking about a more comprehensive and flexible approach. , usually it is an order to ask the child to unconditionally accept his change of mind. If the child does not accept it, he will be angry, stingy, and not considerate of adults. Maybe the author thinks that it is amazing that he is calm and accompanied by the side of the emotionally broken child, but The main point I see is that the adults violated the agreement first and gave absolutely no space for communication.

Event description two:

A single mother (the author) lives with her son and is deeply distressed. When her son was in elementary school, he was complained by the teacher that he would interfere with the order of the class and like to play tricks on his classmates, so he asked the mother to take the child to assess whether he had hyperactive tendencies. But this single mother thinks that her child has no problem at all. She thinks that the elementary school teacher is hostile to her son, and she points out that the teacher in the middle school is very tolerant of her son. How can there be a problem?

my thoughts:

The teacher must have asked the parents to take the assessment because they are very troubled. They should empathize with the teacher's difficulties and hardships. They should not think that making suggestions is hostile to their children. Instead, they should thank the teachers for their careful observation to make the parents alert to the children. If there is a problem after the evaluation, it can be treated as soon as possible. The teacher is actually well-intentioned. Don’t miss the golden treatment period because your child is considered to have a problem.

Again, it doesn’t matter whether a child who knows how to be grateful has nothing to do with hyperactivity. This should not be confused, and the tolerance of a middle school teacher towards the child should not be regarded as an opinion against the primary school teacher. Each teacher’s approach is different, not pointing out the child’s problems. Our teachers are biased. As a parent, we should consider the best interests of the child. If there is no problem after the evaluation, you can rest assured.

The above two events belong to a certain paragraph of the two books, and the authors are also very well-known. Although it is not clear whether any readers have put forward similar views to me, I did make full use of my brain to think in the process of reading. It is not an unconditional assimilation of the points and conclusions that the author wants to feed us.