Guangzhou Quarantine Miscellaneous
When a person is in isolation, the time is chaotic, unlike the three meals a day at home, where three meals a day are fixed and fixed, and family members are used as a reference. In the hotel I have to face the "uncertainty" alone, an abstract feeling that permeates every space of life. So I no longer write in linear chronological order.
When I was in love I said to my boyfriend, "You are the anchor of my life," and now I need to create order in my life. It's the idea of living and documenting it that sustains me.
Quarantine hotels are really like farms, feeding three meals on time and disinfecting three times at designated points. ——Fortunately, the pigs here have not lost their ability to hum, and everyone in the service group is always united to resist unreasonable policies at the first time. A woman complained that it was too hard to poke her nose. After complaining that she had nowhere to go, she said that she was not feeling well and went to the hospital for an examination. The person who was quarantined at her own expense called 12345 and asked to change the hotel because the hotel facilities were outdated and did not meet the price of 350 per day.
I am terrified of getting up. I habitually stay up late, but here I wake up at 6:30 every morning, anxiously waiting for Dabai to do nucleic acid. The cotton swab was inserted into the nostril, held for 15 seconds, and turned three times, as if to smash my brain .
I was terrified of knocking on the door. They always slammed on the door and delivered various supplies or meals. Later, I simply stopped knocking on the door, and the delivery time was not fixed, which further disrupted people's plans.
I am afraid of the phone. Picking up a phone or two a day asking me the same questions: where to quarantine, destination, where the second 7 lives. The staff spoke hot Cantonese Mandarin , very polite, and even said "excuse me". I am very helpless, the system is not smooth and the administrative efficiency is so low.
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Some life episodes.
The food combination is okay, but I don't know why I can't eat it. Later, I remembered that it was because no sugar was added to each dish.
Two mosquitoes flew into the room. I adjusted the air conditioner to 18 degrees, put on a coat and hid under the quilt, and watched the mosquito and me, who would freeze to death first.
The humidity in the air was too high, and a rash developed on my face, which has not disappeared to this day.
Meituan supermarket bought sanitary napkins and a few packs of paper towels. Although the outside was wrapped in a yellow plastic bag, the store still packed the sanitary napkins in a black garbage bag alone in the big bag. He probably thinks he's being nice, doesn't he? After a while, I received an automatic reply from Meituan, "Dear, have you received the item? Since our store is packed with rough guys, please forgive me if I missed it. If you are satisfied, please give a five-star praise." It seems that the gender is vague and wrong. excuse.
The hotel room has three mirrors, two of which face the bed. Do Cantonese people not have this superstition?
I forgot to bring a shower cap and head rope, so I took a mask and tied my hair so that my hair would not get wet when I took a shower.
On the night I came, because I couldn’t get nucleic acid within 48 hours of my vaccination the day before, I had to wait until Tuesday morning at the earliest, so the release date would be delayed by two days. However, the interview time is 8:00 on the 13th, and if you miss it, you can only wait until July (at least mid-July without rush). I went crazy in the medical group and on the phone, the operator called me "beautiful girl" and said "life is not smooth sailing"; I cried to him on purpose. As a result, I originally said that I would have to ask my superiors for instructions in order to get an answer, but after less than five minutes, I called back and told me to do special affairs. To be on the safe side, my boyfriend still helped me brush the reservation system and changed the time to the 15th.
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After I got out of Shanghai, I became a lot more oblivious to what was going on there. It's not because of the reduction in access to information, it's just because of my subjective indifference. So those who are in the vortex of the storm must speak loudly to be heard.
I am also very tired. Some people say that the Red Rose Beauty Salon is the new Huating Hotel, marking the arrival of a new storm. I just thought, here again, he started again, how long will he be doing evil in this land? until he dies?
Read literature and prepare for exams every day in the quarantine hotel. There is an 800 yuan train ticket away from Shanghai, but I am still in the state of PTSD . I can't remember what a "normal" life looks like; maybe for the next generation, the current situation is normal. But I still remember the happiness of walking freely in my city.
Shanghai is no longer home, but a source of fear for me. My love for Shanghai was completely blinded by other things. Shanghai issued a notice saying that to implement the normalization of nucleic acids, those who have no nucleic acid records on the 7th will be given a yellow code; and a community screening will be carried out every weekend. A place is often blocked because of close contact, and 7+7 is implemented on the community because of a confirmed case. It's really insecure to live in such an environment.
This spring has changed all of us. A friend who was studying abroad decided to go back to Shanghai after spending a few days in Guangzhou after a holiday. Unfortunately, his flight ticket was scheduled for the day before I was released from quarantine. We chatted for a while, and finally I said, "It's alright, there's always a chance in the future". But he answered me, "I believed this sentence before the epidemic, and now I don't believe it anymore."
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The contemporary masses need to work hard to learn "Newspeak".
The title of Youth Shanghai is: "Shanghai This Weekend "Should Be Inspected". Are the double quotes here for emphasis or as a term?
The boyfriend said that he remembered his grandfather. During the Cultural Revolution, he was positioned as a "leftist and rightist". This term refers specifically to people who have rightist ideas but are not rightists. Another reason for adding quotation marks is that this "left" is not really left, because the definition of "left" at that time was also fluctuating, and today's left may not be tomorrow's left; therefore, yesterday's "left" should be doubled quotation marks for distinction. Quotes refer to concepts that flow.
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I don't know what to do next. Go back and fight the absurd with the one you love; or stay and endure the lonely wandering of the footless bird? The former solution is more technically difficult. If I have to report to the street when I go back, it is almost impossible for me to deceive my parents and live in my boyfriend’s house. The latter removes the sense of alienation, and the source of income is also a big problem. It is not that they have no money, but they do not want to spend so much money on renting a house.
The bigger trouble is that people in Shanghai are discriminated against because of their identity, which is worse than being discriminated against because of race and skin color abroad. I use airbnb to feel like a direct boss. Originally, I wanted to book a second room during the so-called home health observation period, but a landlord told me directly, "I'm sorry, we have other tenants and will be scolded to death! Please understand." Finally found the second 7 B&B for Shanghai tourists. It is a bit remote near the South Railway Station, so I decided to find a place for the days after 7+7. Almost all the landlords refused to host as soon as they heard about Shanghai. Some say no directly, some say that the community policy is 14+7 (I really want to know if I say this without thinking), some require to show the nucleic acid test results within 48 hours before check-in, the only one that accepts me is the environment. too bad. The base layer is added layer by layer, but that's it. Fortunately, I wanted to book a Home Inn hotel on Beijing Road. As long as the itinerary card no longer shows stars, I don't take the initiative to say that no one knows that I am from Shanghai.
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Negative social news superimposed. Tangshan barbecue restaurant, Shanghai Jinshan, Shanghai Jing'an, Shanghai Pudong, Shanghai and foreign boys prescribe medicine. Totally overwhelmed.
Out of self-preservation instinct, I didn’t dare to click on the detailed report, my brain couldn’t bear the pressure of inputting violent videos. Some people in the circle of friends were ridiculed and some were angry; one of the best friends expressed the great mental pain caused by her female identity, and she cried directly to her mobile phone on the road.
Anger is a good thing, but I don't feel angry anymore , all kinds of things during the lockdown have worn away my temper. Deleting posts again and again has made me clearly aware of the limits of freedom, leaving me with a deep sense of powerlessness .
No one in this land is immune, and in the past Shanghai just gave me the illusion of survivorship bias.
It's not that I think criticism is unnecessary, it's just that strong empathy hurts me. I am reluctant to face the reality that there is nowhere to escape.
On the first day I came here, I didn’t know that I would deliver food, so I gave the takeaway I ordered in advance to the delivery boy; my boyfriend helped a foreign old lady get a health code on the Shanghai subway, and when he got home, he helped the building team leader, Uncle, upload it in the applet antigen photos. The 75-year-old uncle didn't know how to use a mobile phone. When he saw his boyfriend typing, he said, "Your English is really good." Hopefully some of our goodwill doesn't make the world a worse place.
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From time to time, I was sad because my boyfriend wanted to stay in Shanghai to apply for a visa and couldn't come to accompany me, and I couldn't control my emotions at all. He said that I was like the cartoon picture, with two little people standing on my shoulders, an angel and a Satan. They were fighting all the time, and I didn’t know who would win the next second and gain the dominance over me. I always apologize for losing my temper afterwards, like a domestic abuser.
He said I was always empathizing with others, but I didn't use that ability for him. I shouldn't blame him, it's the country's problem. He was also very anxious about his visa materials and wanted to get them done as soon as possible and come to me. But whether the Shanghai consulate is open and closed every day, or the need to be quarantined for a week in other places, these things are beyond our control.
I saw a post on Douban, the landlord said, "I often want to cheat, but not because I don't love him, but because I love him too much, and I'm afraid of being hurt." Many people are scolding her, but I can understand. Essentially we are too selfish. I'll never be able to love each other more than myself like he did. I was too greedy and too insecure, it was impossible to be a conjoined baby all the time; but it was precisely because he was too good that I couldn't find a replacement, and I fell into deeper pain and self-blame. But selfishness and love are two sides of the same coin, aren't they? I will cherish him.
I'm writing a recent paper on ethics, about normative ethics and virtue ethics, and the distinction is much like mine and his. He did a lot of things for me because he really loved me, and he said he didn't expect anything in return; but my actions were more out of moral requirements (such as "closed sexual relationships can't accept cheating") or the responsibility of moral obligations ( e.g. "As a girlfriend I have an obligation to care for his life and to empathize with his situation"). The motives are different, the consequences are similar, how to judge the superior and the inferior?
There are also times when I love myself more than I love him, which causes him to feel that he is a tool man. But I can't change my essence.
Fortunately, the isolation of chaos is finally over.
Arrived at the store on the evening of the 5th, and was temporarily notified in the middle of the night on the 11th to get up and leave at 5:00 a.m. on the 12th. Otherwise, if a new batch of passengers were encountered, they would need to be quarantined for another 7 days.
So I was thrown out of the hotel at six o'clock. After walking for nearly 20 minutes in the wild countryside of Baiyun District (the only difference between this and Wujing Industrial Park is that there are more mountains), I finally found a KFC with dim lights flashing inside. Call the store and ask the staff to let me in and sit for a while (special thanks to the store staff for helping me with my luggage when I went to the toilet a few times). When I ordered a panini at the time of business, all my senses were instantly stimulated, and I immediately recalled the taste of breakfast in middle school. After three months of devastation in Shanghai, I feel so happy to be able to dine in a chain fast food restaurant
- This is a sign of the normal order of life.
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