Essay｜Ren Yin Year Ding Wei Month Ding Mao Day

After learning German in the morning, go to a meeting at 2 pm. Another place that requires ID and 48hr nucleic acid to enter. She came with a blue pattern on a white background. The color of the skirt was brighter, and the whole person was more energetic than last time.

The last time I saw her was in the coffee hall downstairs. Remember that she won't run away when her eyes meet with you, and her pupils are large and clean. This feeling was also felt by a person who made documentaries I knew before. They were all thin and light, with a yellowish complexion. But there is always one that is far away from the mundane, even a little shabby.

All the way to the 20th floor in the elevator, there are people from TV stations in the same elevator car, Shanghai dialect and standard Mandarin are switched, the age is generally 40+, masks cover their expressions, maybe there is nothing fresh without masks expression.

The documentary office was empty.

Several people came one after another in the Conference Room, all of them middle-aged women. Two ponytails and a baggy dress. The two of them sitting at the corners of the table are like two bells (the words "Flowers"), revealing the taste of university administrative teachers.

The only male director was late. He rushed in with a small pigtail and said, "The traffic jam, I didn't expect it." The two bells said, "Ah, then ask us to drink drinks." Then he laughed. The boy said, "I wanted to." The boy was about the same age as me and had a lot of acne on his face, but he seemed very confident in himself.

Two hours into the meeting, everyone started to get tired. As a newcomer and not in a major position like a director, I try to restrain myself and make less comments. What's more, when they see such a young girl, they always feel that they are getting older because of the comparison, and they seem to classify people like me as hostile camps. Just like in many previous meetings, watching like a stranger and responding emotionally in a timely manner is something that female secretaries are often asked to do. But it's actually what I hate the most. Being good at understanding others doesn't mean I'm willing. You must know that I was known for being expressionless in my early years. Let's see how this society has domesticated me. Hope to not serve as this emotional responder as soon as possible.

The woman with the blue pattern on a white background seems to have been in the system for many years and is an atypical Sagittarius. Her speech is organized and pays attention to her words, but she is too bookish and puts too much energy on being right, which makes people feel that she does not have a lot of vitality. The only moment she felt alive was when she taped the falling whiteboard with cellophane tape. "Give it to me." Get the scissors, cut the tape, and seal the whiteboard. She looks a lot like one of my high school classmates, a Lala who has a good literary talent but is aloof.

The meeting finally ended four hours later. The heat wave was raging outside. I clicked on the Moments and saw that someone posted a photo of Coldplay's concert in Berlin. Hey, what's the use of being unwilling and angry? Only by accepting this time, engraved in my emotional memory bank, will feel more excitement because of contrast when encountering greater freedom in the future.