"Change After Cancer #16" Embrace your imperfection.

I was born with poor hearing in both ears.
Because of his young age,
My family didn't notice my abnormality either.
I just feel like I'm a little slower.
Other parts are normal.

until you learn to speak,
Although my family felt that my speech was not very clear,
But I thought that it was a stinky milkman for children,
didn't care too much,
It should be fine to grow up anyway.
Naturally it didn't occur to me that there might be something wrong with my hearing.

During the period of learning phonetic symbols,
For the three groups of ㄐㄑㄒ, ㄓㄔㄕㄗㄘㄙ, ㄢㄤ,
I was simply helpless.
Because I can't hear the difference at all,
Had to guess, or use imitation.
I thought my voice was the same as others,
In fact it is much worse.
Now think about it,
When my mother was teaching me phonetic symbols,
There must have been a lot of setbacks!

After entering elementary school,
Some classmates thought I was a big tongue,
Either making fun of my inarticulateness, or speaking with scrambled eggs,
There are even a few annoying classmates,
Will teach me to speak in class,
Everyone burst into laughter when they heard it,
When I was young,
Just pretend it doesn't happen,
Also laughed.

Although the teacher corrected on the spot,
But I was really hurt and sad inside.
I often wonder why my classmates treat me like this,
I didn't mean to speak clearly!

I don't remember if it was a fourth or a fifth.
the end of a class,
My classmate suddenly called me, saying that the teacher was calling me.
Nervous, I immediately went straight to it,
The teacher only asked me one sentence:
Did you hear the teacher calling you just now?
I was worried and afraid that my own was different,
will be scolded by the teacher,
Or be transferred to a special class.
Immediately lied and said yes,
The teacher heard my answer and said it was all right,
I also breathed a sigh of relief.

Perhaps it was because the primary school at that time did not provide too many special education student resources,
As long as a classmate is different from everyone else,
It is easy to become the target of bullying.
So I don't want to be a different person.

My mother once said that I was bullied badly in elementary school for a period of time,
I was startled,
Because I have no impression at all,
It was probably too painful, so the memory was erased,
fair enough,
Let those bad memories go!

I once thought,
Why do you dislike children so much?
Maybe it was because there were too many shadows left in elementary school at that time,
So you will be very afraid to interact with children!
Perhaps the child speaks very straightforwardly,
I am often asked in public, "Why are your words so strange?"
Made me very embarrassed and embarrassed,
He can only be left and right.

During high school,
Although hard of hearing,
But still relying on silent back to exchange for not bad results,
So not to be bullied too badly,
Even the popularity is not bad.

During college and university,
Maybe everyone has grown up.
I don't particularly ask about my non-standard accent.
Everyone thought I was a big tongue,
I did not specifically explain the condition caused by hearing.

Even after leaving the society,
I still continue to keep the secret that is different from everyone else.
Afraid that others will find out,
have a different opinion on me,
Even take this to hurt me,
I guess I must not be brave enough,
Otherwise, why can't you face your own imperfections?

I have been envious of others being able to say a standard word since I was a child,
I'm so envious that everyone can hear the voice that I can't hear.
Especially seeing those classmates who can express their opinions fluently after taking the stage,
It is even more admirable!
Sometimes I imagine if I was normal like everyone else,
What will life be like?
What will the day be like?
Will you be braver?
Become more fearless?

Years ago, I learned about the Australian Working Holiday Program,
I have always wanted to experience life abroad,
I want to test my broken English again.
So I decided to apply for an Australian working holiday visa.
I thought I couldn't hear it in English.
But at least you can communicate by simple words!
I also went to have my hearing checked,
With a pair of expensive hearing aids,
Fortunately, the mental and physical impairment of mild hearing impairment proved that,
Can subsidize some of the cost of hearing aids.

I have new ears,
Fly to Australia with a few Australian dollars.
Even if I can't find a job,
Living alone in Australia for two to three months,
Also a wonderful experience!

But I still make a lot of jokes in Australia,
Like listening to firework as five work,
Chicken is called kitchen,
For me, this is everyday.

I can't even hear Chinese well, so I can't speak for sure.
English with so many breaths,
How could it be better?
Fortunately, everyone thought I was just bad at English.
And no one doubted my hearing.
But I really appreciate the lovely Australian bosses who are still willing to hire me,
Allowed me to stay in Australia for over a year.
To this day I still consider myself incredibly lucky!

As for the new ears,
Although brought to Australia,
But because of work, I only wear it once for a long time.
In addition, I have been unable to adapt to the suffocation in my ears,
and those unstoppable screeching noises,
Finally had to unplug it.
Put it on hold until now.

Seems to be off topic, let's get back to the point.
This secret that has been kept hidden for many years,
until I got sick,
Just realized that the secret is no big deal,
As long as I can live,
What if the hearing is not good?
Good health is a kind of happiness,
And most importantly,
Hearing is not degraded,
It is worthy of gratitude!

Now, if someone asks about my accent,
will be honest:
"Because the hearing is not very good, the speech is not so clear."
"If you can't hear it later, please don't mind!"
again,
I'm used to looking at each other's lips to help understand the conversation,
So it can be considered a little bit of lip language!
This should be considered a benefit!

After being open and candid,
My friends also know my true condition,
As long as you can't hear clearly,
Everyone would like to say it again,
And I don't have to pretend to understand anymore!
It feels so good!

When I accept my imperfection from the bottom of my heart,
My heart became inexplicably warm,
It turned out to be true,
It will really change your mind!

Although,
I have bad hearing,
Speech is also not standard.
But, because of these imperfections,
to meet a lot of good-hearted people,
Make my life more crazy and interesting!