The Dilemma of Trust and Unknown: Revisiting the Aiders of the "Li Xingxing" Case

Editor's note:

In April 2020, Li Xingxing (pseudonym) spoke out with the help of mainstream media and social bloggers, accusing his "adoptive father", a returned executive and well-known lawyer Bao Yuming of sexual assault against him. Due to the huge public response, the Supreme People's Procuratorate and The Ministry of Public Security dispatched a joint supervision team to guide the police in Shandong, Anhui, Jiangsu and Beijing and Tianjin to conduct large-scale investigations. Amid the public outrage, most of the aiders who had stepped in to accompany and help Li Xingxing a year earlier, but then withdrew one after another, remained silent. On September 17, 2020, the joint supervision team reported the details of the case. The reporter revisited the original helpers to understand their original actions and how they view the outcome of the incident today. They are people who have truly devoted their time, professional efforts and emotions to accompany Li Xingxing, and do not believe that there is a black and white truth; the inner conflicts and frustrations they have experienced highlight the complex aspects of sexual assault issues and victim assistance, as well as just Solving difficult structural problems through aid.

Written by/Feiton

Editor/Zhao Xiaolu

The original article was first published in Allnow: https://www.allnow.com/post/5f66cb1d6d091b2e9f53d373

In April 2019, Li Xingxing sent three WeChat messages to Lin Man (pseudonym).

"Isn't the law supposed to protect the victim? Why do you leave the rapist alone but keep hurting me?"

"You will never understand how I feel, just like I will never understand."

"It's so painful that I can only find relief by ending my own life."

The fourth is a ten-second video of wrist slitting. Lin Man was in a meeting and felt panicked and uncomfortable after seeing it. She immediately ran out of the meeting room and called Li Xingxing on WeChat, but the other party blocked her again. Lin Man urgently contacted local social workers and volunteers in Nanjing and asked them to go rescue Li Xingxing.

Although this is not the first time this has happened.

Back in the conference room, Lin Man sat paralyzed. A head of a women's organization who has been assisting victims of sexual assault and domestic violence for more than ten years reminded her, "She is coercing you, so be careful and don't let her lead you."

Since Luo Xixi, a Ph.D. graduate of Beihang University, reported sexual harassment with her real name on January 1, 2018, and triggered a wave of sexual harassment revelations on social media, more and more women have come forward to testify about the sexual harassment and assault they have experienced. Lin Man also began to participate in sexual harassment and sexual assault assistance as a volunteer from that time. All along, she has been carefully balancing between being "victim-centered" and "not being coerced by the victim." However, starting from the beginning of 2019, when Li Xingxing took the initiative to add her on WeChat to seek help from her, the matter was beyond her ability.

A year later, Li Xingxing's social media accusation first attracted sympathy and indignation from netizens, but then faced backlash from public opinion after the conclusion of the police investigation was announced. But for Lin Man and those who had helped her, the situation was not so ups and downs, because most of the sexual assault stories were complicated.

avoidance and repetition

Before Li Xingxing, Lin Man had contact with sexual assault victims. She has learned relevant knowledge about sexual harassment, sexual assault and other sexual violence, and participated in sexual harassment intervention workshops. She is very clear that behind sexual violence are unequal power relations and outdated gender concepts, as well as a serious lack of intervention mechanisms and social support networks.

So when Li Xingxing told her intermittently that he had been sexually assaulted by his adoptive father, had been controlled for a long time, and was so helpless that he had committed suicide many times, Lin Man naturally chose the stance of "believing the victim".

But during the assistance process, Lin Man was not without doubts.

She noticed that it was particularly difficult for Li Xingxing to build trust. Li Xingxing was only willing to type and send audio messages with her, but was never willing to video chat with her. She discovered that Li Xingxing claimed to be a senior in high school, but often sent her messages during school hours and at one or two o'clock late at night. She also noticed that there were inconsistencies and inconsistencies in Li Xingxing's story. When she asked questions, Li Xingxing would avoid answering by saying, "I'm in class now" or "I'm busy with my studies." She wanted to have a video chat with Li Xingxing's mother, but Li Xingxing refused. She wanted to contact the "social worker sister" and "doctor grandma" whom Li Xingxing said she had sought help from before, but Li Xingxing delayed her for various reasons. She wanted to see Li Xingxing's student ID card and the school where Li Xingxing attended, but Li Xingxing always blocked it by saying "preparing for the college entrance examination." When she found out Bao Yuming's identity, Li Xingxing stopped her from contacting Bao and even asked her not to inquire about Bao's information.

Lin Man adheres to the "victim-centered" concept and respects the victims' stories and demands. What she was thinking was that maybe the person involved didn't fully trust her yet and wanted to ask for help but was wary of her.

In March 2019, after Lin Man linked lawyers, social workers, psychological counselors and judicial resources to Li Xingxing, Li Xingxing's behavior became even more abnormal and repetitive: She said she hated Bao for a while, but when the helper told her, based on Bao's U.S. citizenship , when the consulate replied that it could investigate Bao if there was evidence, it also said that it fell in love with Bao; at one time it said it just wanted to send Bao to prison; at another it said it was afraid that Bao would die in prison at an early age; at another it said it wanted to leave the environment where Bao was around, At one moment, she said that her life was ruined and could only be with Bao; at one moment, she sent a message saying that she was determined to report Bao, and at another moment, she called and cried, "Forget it, let him go. Even if it's just a dog, I won't let him go." ".

Stockholm Syndrome? Li Xingxing’s worry, fear, and repetition during the process of asking for help, as well as the diagnosis of depression and anxiety issued by the hospital, temporarily responded and explained some of the confusion and inability of Lin Man and the lawyers and social workers who assisted him. Everyone believed that Li Xingxing was affected by It is a huge trauma that requires more time to understand and face. “Believe the victim,” “There is no perfect victim,” and “Don’t blame the victim harshly”—these are principles often discussed by aid providers.

Moreover, it is understandable that people who are stimulated by harm cannot face the harm within a certain period of time, or the harm is too serious to talk about, or the story is chaotic and disorderly, or even the logic is unclear. What Lin Man was thinking at the time was that for an American lawyer with money, status, knowledge and power, Li Xingxing, who was born in a rural area and was a left-behind child, was in an absolutely disadvantaged position.

Fu Wei, a Changsha lawyer who also participated in the early stage of assistance, said frankly that working on sexual assault cases requires empathy with the victim. “Without belief and empathy, you cannot feel the victim’s feelings and understand the victim, and you cannot provide effective assistance; At what point in love do you have to step away and think about the truth? This requires long-term learning."

Difficulties in collecting evidence

Fu Wei, as a lawyer, participated in the preliminary assistance before Li Xingxing's case was exposed. She remembered her role when she started to intervene in early May 2019: not a social worker, not a counselor, not responsible for Li Xingxing's emotional comfort, only responsible for information about the case itself.

However, Li Xingxing had a strong desire to talk and would send messages and call Fu Wei in the middle of the night. At that time, Fu Wei was a new mother and had a natural maternal anger towards "child sexual abuse" and "lawyers who knew the law and broke the law". While taking care of the newborn baby, she helped Li Xingxing without hesitation.

"At that time, it was assumed that her situation was dangerous. Failure to deal with it in time would have serious consequences. We also considered that as a rescuer, failure to respond in time would cause secondary harm, so we always respond to requests, no matter how late." Fu Wei wanted to advance the legal process. , however she could not get any valid information from Li Xingxing at all.

"The information she gave was repetitive, invalid, and even contradictory." Fu Wei recalled that Li Xingxing repeatedly asked her, "Why didn't the police open a case? Why did they open a case and then withdraw it? Why is her evidence not considered evidence?"

However, when Fu Wei refined the problem and asked her for details, specific scenarios and even the procedure for calling the police, Li Xingxing hesitated, "If the person involved does not provide feedback, or provides invalid information feedback, then nothing can be done." .”

Li Xingxing kept urging Fu Wei to go to the police station as a lawyer, and even questioned whether she "deliberately did not go to the police station to investigate her report and file the case." However, when it came to the specific entrustment, Li Xingxing repeatedly delayed and did not respond.

At that time, under the urging of Lin Man, Fu Wei, and other aid providers An Ning (pseudonym), Li Xingxing provided the evidence she said: pictures of Bao with his bare upper body holding tape, playback records of pedophile-related videos, and toilet paper Bloodshot traces.

Now it seems that these so-called evidences cannot actually explain anything. What are you doing when you are naked and tearing off the tape? When, where, and under what specific circumstances did it happen? When was the recording recorded? Who saw it? Is the blood on the toilet due to menstruation or something else? How can it be confirmed that it is Li Xingxing? And it was after being sexually assaulted? However, based on Li Xingxing's narrative and the information provided by Li Xingxing at the time, everyone involved in the assistance felt that the incident was terrible, and they were unable to further investigate the authenticity of the picture.

In addition, Li Xingxing also repeatedly disclosed to Fu Wei his "suicidal" thoughts and actions, which made Fu Wei feel depressed, nervous, and even desperate and powerless throughout the entire assistance process.

Lin Man raised her biggest dilemma, which was how to verify the authenticity of these evidences. For example, Li Xingxing sent her ID card number and real name after her repeated requests. "The ID card was authentic and valid at that time. Who would question that this ID card had been changed? You know, modifying the ID card information also requires a certain amount of time." H."

Moreover, the Supreme Procuratorate and the Ministry of Public Security dispatched a supervision team to review Li Xingxing's academic records and historical files, investigate the relevant parties, and combine it with the results of Li Xingxing's bone age assessment to verify her true date of birth.

Lin Man recalled that even if the anxiety and depression diagnosis certificate Li Xingxing sent her, there was actually no way to verify that it was Li Xingxing's. "She had truncated it. She could only see the symptoms, but not the name, time, or identity." information."

As an aid provider who brings his own dry food to help vulnerable groups, what ability and resources do he have to verify the evidence provided by the parties? Should we stop assisting when there is no way to reach the truth?

The lesson Fu Wei learned is that if she encounters such a case again, she must not rely on the person seeking help as the sole source of information. “She must look for other information sources.”

However, when Lin Man managed to get in touch with the Nanjing social worker who Li Xingxing had sought help from and the Nanjing police station to learn the full story, Li Xingxing's trust in Lin Man was destroyed.

Copy Fang Siqi

Young girls, sexual assault, imprisonment, brainwashing, pedophilia. In Li Xingxing’s story, every word is a news hot spot. Lin Man has experience working as a media reporter. With so many elements put into one story, she knows how explosive and lethal the event can be.

Even though she chose to believe Li Xingxing in principle and contacted lawyers, social workers and psychological resources to provide assistance, Lin Man still had reservations about Li Xingxing's multiple demands for exposure and rights protection. She knew very well that in order to be exposed to the media, she needed to verify and corroborate the facts of sexual assault. However, after asking many parties, she had no evidence to support this sexual assault allegation. She became more cautious.

Lin Man bypassed Li Xingxing, contacted Nanjing social workers and the Nanjing Women's Federation, and learned from the other party information that Li Xingxing had never said: Li Xingxing had indeed called the police, and the Nanjing Women's Federation also sent assistance lawyers, psychological counselors and social workers. assistance.

"Why did the Women's Federation give you assistance, but you said it didn't?"

"Were you accompanied by a social worker from Nanjing when you called the police? Why can't you contact the social worker in Nanjing (now)? Do you have any concerns?"

"Did you take the initiative to withdraw the case?"

When Lin Man asked Li Xingxing these questions, Li Xingxing was very resistant and accused the Nanjing social worker of having contact with Bao and not helping her at all.

Li Xingxing also asked Lin Man, "Why don't you believe me like the police? Why is the victim bleeding to provide you with evidence even though he was injured?"

Lin Man replied to Li Xingxing, "If you want to expose it, these issues will be questioned and amplified."

An Ning, a rescuer who came to the rescue at the same time, remembered that Li Xingxing asked for exposure many times, and repeatedly said "can't live" and "standing on the bridge, wanting to jump", and sent a positioning to Lin Man, in order to Lin Man was asked to write a manuscript to be exposed. Journalists from some news organizations have encountered similar situations.

When Lin Man rejected Li Xingxing's request for exposure, Li Xingxing no longer trusted Lin Man and turned to Fu Wei and An Ning for help.

During An Ning's review of the assistance process, she found that Li Xingxing had learned the words of the protagonist in Taiwanese writer Lin Yihan's novel "Fang Siqi's First Love Paradise", "My love is all forced to happen", "If I don't love him, I How can I survive?”, “When I am hurt, I feel dirty for the rest of my life.”

She also began to wonder if social media’s anti-sexual harassment model could help her. She will ask An Ning how the people who came forward in the #MeToo craze in China overcame their fear; they will also talk about Stockholm Syndrome and trauma.

An Ning asked what caused her to go back and forth, and her answer was: "What I go back and forth about is my attitude towards him, whether I should let him go to jail, not the fact that he sexually assaulted me. I know very well that he is He sexually assaulted me. What I am struggling with is, should I let him go to jail? What should I do if he goes to jail and dies? I also know very clearly that even if my attitude towards him will change, my affection and love for him are all in his years. It was caused by years of brainwashing. Isn’t this what everyone should consider? How could I, a teenager, fall in love with someone who is thirty or forty years old? How could I not struggle with it again and again after being hurt like this at such a young age? ?”

An Ning pointed out that even if every aider realizes that Li Xingxing tells everyone differently, has reservations, and some lies, he cannot blame the victim harshly and must tell everything without any cover-up. , “It’s normal to have reservations.”

Xianzi, who was himself a client of sexual harassment and later assisted clients in many cases, discovered that in some cases, Fang Siqi's expressions were imitated in the reporters' narratives, which attracted huge attention and naturally attracted imitations. Yet attention can lead to backlash.

Aiders have withdrawn

During the half year of Lin Man's intervention, he watched the helpers withdraw from Li Xingxing's case one after another.

The first person to withdraw was lawyer surnamed Qiu, who had questioned Li Xingxing from the beginning.

One day in late February 2019, Li Xingxing informed Lin Man and other helpers that her adoptive father Bao Yuming had come to Nanjing. She wanted to see Bao Yuming one last time and obtain evidence such as semen or recordings.

Lin Man and others certainly did not support Li Xingxing's idea. They analyzed various risks for her, but they could not sway Li Xingxing's decision. Lin Man and others had no choice but to propose that they at least have to be accompanied by local social workers and let her mother know.

At this time, Lawyer Qiu raised questions for the first time. He was worried that Li Xingxing had delusions of being persecuted. He repeatedly told Li Xingxing that he needed to contact the psychological counselor who Li Xingxing had sought help in Nanjing and the teacher at the Nanjing Women's Federation Minor Protection Center.

Li Xingxing sensitively sensed Lawyer Qiu's doubts and became angry and aggrieved. "I asked them for help, but they all said there was no evidence and told me not to go anywhere else. I didn't believe them and didn't want them to know."

The expedient solution is to ask Li Xingxing's mother to intervene. Aiders asked to speak to Li Xingxing's mother. What shocked them deeply was that Li Xingxing's mother actually agreed with Li Xingxing's decision and gave the same reasons as Li Xingxing said: "Anyway, I have been sexually assaulted by him for three years, hundreds of times. To be honest, I am numb. If you can obtain key evidence such as semen by injuring him once, then you don’t care.”

Lawyer Qiu couldn't believe what Li Xingxing and his mother said, and suggested that there might be something hidden. He believed that the help seekers were dishonest and it was difficult to provide effective assistance, so he was the first to withdraw from the assistance.

Lin Man also had more doubts. After Lawyer Qiu withdrew, she linked Li Xingxing to another lawyer Wan Miaoyan in March. Wan Miaoyan once represented Li Yan in the murder case of his father, and also assisted parties involved in sexual assault cases such as Luo Qianqian and Xianzi.

Li Xingxing initially welcomed Wan Miaoyan's assistance. Wan Miaoyan also actively participated in the assistance and investigation, but after she launched the investigation, she had more doubts about Li Xingxing.

Wan Miaoyan got more information from the Nanjing police and the Nanjing Women's Federation. In addition to the support that Li Xingxing had called the police, she found that Li Xingxing had concealed many things. For example, Li Xingxing's mother had known about it for a long time and had even collected Bao's money.

She found out Li Xingxing’s experience in reporting the crime: Li Xingxing called the police and was sexually assaulted. The police had opened a case. However, Li Xingxing did not listen to the advice and later went to a hotel to have a relationship with his “adopted father”. He also went to the police station to withdraw the case. Repeatedly, the police also Feeling helpless.

Wan Miaoyan also forgave Li Xingxing at that time, thinking that Li Xingxing was like most women who suffered domestic violence, unable to leave at once and unable to tell all the truth.

However, the more Wan Miaoyan learned, the more he discovered that Li Xingxing was not only dishonest, but also suspected of lying and slandering others. Nanjing revealed to her that after a report was made, a registered social worker came to assist Li Xingxing, and Li Xingxing sent the accompanying social worker away at the police station. When the social worker asked the police why they did not open a case, the police replied, "There is no case. The girl said she was in a relationship with the other party."

When this incident came to Li Xingxing's mouth, Li Xingxing accused, "It was the social worker who told the police that my adoptive father and I were in a 'lover relationship'. Why did she harm me like this?"

Wan Miaoyan raised questions based on her professional experience: Social workers accompany minors for questioning. As long as the minor is over 10 years old, the police will let the minor make his own statement instead of being replaced by accompanying characters such as parents or social workers. State the facts of the case.

"In such a situation, the police will not allow a social worker to make a statement instead. This social worker has been engaged in the protection of minors in Nanjing for a long time, and her professional ability will not allow her to say such irresponsible words in such a situation." Wan Miaoyan According to analysis, Li Xingxing not only lied, but also slandered the people who assisted her. "She will slander the people who helped her today. If it doesn't suit her, she can slander me tomorrow."

Wan Miaoyan also pointed out that Li Xingxing could lie naturally at the police station, and there would be countless lies behind one lie. For example, Li Xingxing once swore that she had never taken a penny from Bao. When a social worker testified that her mother had received money, she changed her claim. As Bao's adopted daughter, it was normal for her to use his money.

Wan Miaoyan questioned Li Xingxing many times, which led Li Xingxing to criticize Wan Miaoyan in front of Lin Man, "This aunt is too powerful, her words are so hurtful" and even asked to change lawyers.

"Li Xingxing can turn his back on what he said in front of the police, let alone in front of other people." Wan Miaoyan asked herself to be cautious in taking the case, but found that she could not believe Li Xingxing, and she resolutely withdrew from assisting Li Xingxing.

The aider who subsequently withdrew was An Ning. Anning studied psychology, conducted in-depth research on feminist theory, and also taught herself some laws related to the protection of women's rights and interests. In her view, the Li Xingxing incident is a social structural tragedy. Without the support of huge social resources, there is no way to assist Li Xingxing. "For example, isolating Li Xingxing and Bao can provide shelter for Li Xingxing," she said. How many places are there?”

The reason for An Ning's withdrawal was not that she didn't believe Li Xingxing's story, but that she believed she did not have enough experience and ability to balance "being victim-centered" and "not being coerced by the victim." In addition, Li Xingxing's constant need for companionship seriously disrupted her mood and life.

She had great doubts about the "adoption" and the role of Li Xingxing's parents in the incident. Even though the Supreme People's Procuratorate and the Ministry of Public Security have now reported the investigation into Bao's suspected sexual assault, An Ning pointed out that her question has not yet been answered: Is it Li Xingxing's true wish to "improve living conditions" through "adoption"? Or is it the parents’ intention? The change of birth date occurred before Li Xingxing was "adopted", so who was leading the idea and action of changing the birth date? What are the roles and purposes of parents? Is Li Xingxing actively cooperating or opposing? Does she have the ability to object?

Lawyer Fu Wei, Lawyer Li Ying, Lawyer Yang Bin, Lin Man and many volunteers who then intervened to provide assistance all withdrew from the assistance work because they were unable to obtain effective information from Li Xingxing, and Li Xingxing did not provide the required materials for a long time.

According to Lin Man's later understanding, Li Xingxing once again blocked the WeChat accounts of all the volunteers and lawyers he had assisted, and then continued to seek help through social networks for a new round.

Conflict intensifies

At the end of May 2019, Li Ying, director of the Beijing Yuanzhong Gender Development Center and lawyer, received a call from her colleague Li Huiru, saying that the recipient Li Xingxing was going to commit suicide by jumping into the sea. Talk to the other party - the background of WeChat voice and phone calls is the sound of waves and wading in the water.

The day was spent in a hectic manner. Li Ying called a local friend who was driving to work and contacted Li Xingxing's mother through the women's and children's rights network in Nanjing. An hour or two later, the friend took Li Xingxing's mother to the beach. Li Xingxing had been "rescued" - the friend did not know the truth at that time. Finally, Li Ying's friends sent the mother and daughter to a nearby police station.

This made Li Ying extremely scared. Since the hotline received Li Xingxing’s request for help in late April, her experience has been the same as that of previous lawyers, social workers and reporters. “I completely believed her at the time.”

At that time, Li Xingxing's request was to allow the police to open the case again. She said that she would turn 18 in a few months. She also said that she was already suffering from severe depression and had suicidal tendencies. The doctor asked her to be hospitalized. "We feel that we need to pay more attention to her. I said that you are a minor and I need to communicate with your parents." It was still not easy to get Li Xingxing to cooperate. Li Ying persisted and finally got the opportunity to communicate with Li Xingxing's mother, " It feels like her mother doesn't have any ideas, whatever her daughter says." But it's not too weird anyway - maybe it's just like many family members of victims she has met, maybe because of their abilities, living conditions and education level, they can't Give your children more help.

Later, in the process of communicating with relevant departments in Shandong and Nanjing, Li Ying learned about many complicated situations that Li Xingxing had not told her, and felt a little confused and "the situation was not right." At that time, the possibility of filing another case was very slim. She could only advise the latter, "There is a problem of insufficient evidence. We will work hard and don't be too anxious."

In fact, contact with aiders such as Li Ying intensified the conflict between Bao and Li. According to Bao Yuming's records, this time period was the period when Li Xingxing and a certain "Beijing aunt" began to "conspire" to send him to prison. Some helpers felt that Li Xingxing would eventually let Bao Yuming know about their existence, and it seemed that this had become part of the struggle between the two parties.

Soon, Li Xingxing called and said that Bao Yuming had injured him and was at the police station at that time. Yuanzhong decided to help her apply for an emergency relief fund, but it took a long time with Li Xingxing to obtain the identity information required for the application.

Within a few days, the relief fund was returned to Yuanzhong. Li Xingxing told them that Bao paid the medical bills. "I'm a little touched. I think this is a sensible child. It's not easy to know these support resources for her."

Similar to others, Li Ying's feelings towards Li Xingxing fluctuate between confusion and pity. She knew that her repetitions and lies were very different from those of the clients she had encountered before; but in Li Ying's view, these behaviors were similar to those of the victims she had encountered in the past: she could not place her emotions, so she fell in love The perpetrator is understandable. Focusing on taking care of Li Xingxing, Yuanzhong formed a WeChat group with Shenzhen Chunfeng Psychological Trauma Assistance Public Welfare Platform and a counselor in Nanjing who helped Li Xingxing.

After the incident of jumping into the sea, Li Ying felt that the situation was dangerous and her psychological problems could not be postponed any longer. "I told her that pursuing responsibility will not be a matter of time. The most important thing for you is to get medical treatment." Li Xingxing was uncooperative. , Yuanzhong’s colleagues applied for the emergency relief fund again, and after a lot of effort, they finally convinced her to be hospitalized.

"Auntie, can I come to Beijing to see you?" Li Xingxing began to request. Li Ying felt that Li Xingxing had shown strong dominance in handling the case, and Li Ying, who knew more and more complex situations, wanted to stick to her own rhythm and thinking in handling the case, so she declined her visit and asked her to study hard first without delay. take an exam.

Soon, the staff of Yuanzhong, Chunfeng and the psychological counselor in Nanjing were "collectively blocked" by Li Xingxing.

black box

In early April 2020, Li Xingxing's case attracted national attention after being exposed in "South Wind Window". Qianqian Law Firm stepped in to assist, with lawyers Guo Jianmei and Lu Xiaoquan co-representing the case. At this time, Li Xingxing had almost asked for help from all the social organizations in the country that had the most experience in dealing with gender violence.

Lu Xiaoquan said frankly that after the case became a national public opinion incident, a reporter came to them and asked for assistance to Li Xingxing. "But during the investigation stage of the case, what we can do is very limited. We cannot see the core evidence, and there is not even a page of the investigation file." It can be seen that there is not enough verification capability for the evidence provided by Li Xingxing, such as his ID card.”

After becoming agents, Guo Jianmei and Lu Xiaoquan have maintained contact with Li Xingxing. During that time, Li Xingxing's emotional and mental state was unstable. Sometimes he was so anxious that he called them for long consultations at two or three in the morning.

The two met with Li Xingxing and repeatedly asked to meet Li Xingxing's mother to understand the situation. However, due to various reasons, I have never been able to see Li Xingxing’s mother or other family members.

To all aid workers, Li Xingxing's family is like a black box, making it impossible to see clearly what's going on inside. What is the specific structure of Li Xingxing's family situation, what role did her parents play in the incident, and what kind of education did she receive? Li Xingxing was studying in one of the top high schools in his hometown county, and his grades were pretty good. Why did he suddenly "call in sick" and go to Nanjing? What kind of sickness is this"? According to the current investigation report, Li Xingxing’s family only started contacting Bao in September 2015. However, Li Xingxing’s father changed Li Xingxing’s age and ID card in March 2015. Why? Whose idea was it to change the age? How on earth are resources mobilized to change ID cards?

These are key pieces of information that led to the Li Xingxing case. However, neither media interviews nor investigations by the Supreme Procuratorate and the Ministry of Public Security provided an in-depth explanation. Without a comprehensive understanding of these factors, it is impossible to detect logical relationships, and it is impossible to accurately analyze and judge the entire event. How to get to the truth?

Lu Xiaoquan's professional dilemma is how to quickly establish mutual trust and friendly communication relationships with various parties. Faced with various disturbing public opinions, how to effectively identify them in the first place and help the parties involved to shield themselves from secondary harm. How to promptly and effectively dilute the burden of negative information on attorneys’ bodies and minds.

Li Xingxing did not trust his aiders, including lawyers, and responded with some self-righteous lies when questioned, making the truth of the incident increasingly confusing. concluded the intervening lawyer.

Li Ying had the experience of being separated from her parents in her childhood, which made her constantly return to her family of origin and early experiences to understand "why Li Xingxing became such a child." Her experience in case assistance tells her that acquaintance sexual assault cases are rarely simple and clear, and the complex mental state of the parties will make sexual assault cases more difficult to solve. "We cannot easily condemn possible victims. There must be a logic behind what they do. One is why there is no sense of security and no trust in the people who help her? It has to do with childhood experiences."

Some reporters who reported on the case revealed that Li Xingxing was a good student in junior high school and was a class cadre; his parents took their son to Nanjing earlier and gave their daughter to their parents back home. This made Li Ying even more suspicious of the role played by Xingxing's family in the events she later experienced.

Zhang Lan (pseudonym), a psychologist who has long provided psychological counseling to victims of gender-based violence, said that individuals who suffered childhood sexual assault and other early traumatic experiences, such as domestic violence and parental neglect, devaluation and discrimination, if they do not have support from important others, they will Their view of themselves, others, and the world around them is negatively affected. This is the result of childhood trauma.

Zhang Lan said that in sexual assault incidents, most of the experienced aiders are journalists, members of women’s organizations and lawyers, who mostly understand the incident from the perspective of social structure and law; while psychological counselors who have accumulated relevant cases intervene Rarely - handling the cases of such clients requires a lot of time and psychological energy. At the same time, you may need to pay expensive supervision fees to obtain professional guidance, and pay equally expensive personal experience fees (personal experience refers to psychological counselors As a client, go to a senior person for psychological counseling) to prevent or deal with possible vicarious trauma. The staff of the judicial system may lack understanding of the gender situation and the special way of thinking and behavior of such parties, so communication problems may arise.

In the process of rescuing Li Xingxing, the helper is likely to eventually retreat because he feels powerless, helpless, aggrieved or angry. Zhang Lan reminded that such rescue work requires very professional knowledge, including knowledge in the fields of gender perspective, traumatology and personality structure, as well as corresponding intervention experience. "We all need to help them if we are able to protect ourselves, otherwise we will be like people who don't know how to swim and go to save others in the water, and we will be in vain."

A few years ago, there was a sexual assault case that required intervention. The referrer reminded Guo Jianmei: "This may not be a good client." Guo Jianmei's response was: "It doesn't matter, the client is rarely 'good'." - It won't be like As impeccable and pure as most people imagine her to be, she is not always honest with lawyers. This is a fact that she has become accustomed to as she has provided legal aid to disadvantaged women and children for a long time.

Guo Jianmei insisted that even if no evidence was found that Bao Yuming violated Li Xingxing's will and used violence, coercion or other means to force sexual relations with Li Xingxing, Bao Moumou knew that he and Li Xingxing's situation did not meet the requirements of adoption and adoption under relevant laws. Adoption conditions, and under the mistaken belief that Li Xingxing is a minor, still dating and having sexual relations with Li Xingxing in the name of "adoption" is already a subjective sexual assault.

Many rescuers have similar views on Bao Yuming: It is unfair for him to use his socioeconomic status to harm young women whose status and experience are vastly different from his. It is just that the law is not prepared. Intervene in this injustice.

Aid challenges in the age of social media

The truth has not been completely clear due to the release of the investigation results. There have been polarizations on social media between "reversal" and "no reversal".

In the current Internet environment, victims seek help from many sources. While learning from other people's experiences, they are also equipped to think of various ways to polish their own stories. Seekers may also believe that seeking help from professional organizations and professionals is not as fast and effective as seeking help from the Internet. However, insufficient consideration of the goals, costs, and legal risks of rights protection may cause the parties to bear more than expected pressure due to direct exposure to online violence and divisive public opinion, making it more difficult to resolve individual cases.

During the recent Internet storm caused by Liang Ying and Luo Guanjun over whether date rape occurred, one of Li Ying’s sexual assault clients specifically expressed his gratitude to her. Because Li dissuaded her from exposing the other party's behavior on the Internet with her real name, and won a victory for her in court. Regarding exposure, Li Ying's position has always been: "You must protect your information and avoid secondary harm, because exposure is irreversible and uncontrollable." She believes that many parties may not realize that extreme caution is needed to expose facts. , this process is inseparable from the help of professionals.

Lin Man has repeatedly reminded Li Xingxing to be cautious about exposure and face public opinion. However, neither Li Xingxing nor the Weibo account "Sister of the Victim of the Sexual Assault Case of Yantai Lawyer B" who helped her speak out seems to lack media experience. More than one media had encountered Li Xingxing claiming that he would commit suicide before publishing the article. When a video media report made Li Xingxing dissatisfied, the "sister of the victim of Yantai Lawyer B's sexual assault case" directly announced that she had not been interviewed by this media.

Lin Man noticed that public opinion on social media is still a polar battle between "Li Xingxing fraud" or "Bao pedophile sexual abuse", or the opposing positions of "believing the victim" or "blaming the victim". Those who have been working on women's rights issues for a long time believe that there is no black and white truth.

"What should be reflected on is, why are there such common online requests for help?" Li Ying believes that there are insufficient concepts in understanding sexual violence and specific problems in practice. The current situation is that many real sexual assault cases cannot go through legal procedures, but the Internet can Acts as an external pressure to promote case resolution. When the social support system is insufficient, online public opinion can also be a comfort to victims.

Xianzi summed up her experience in supporting victims. If they want to insist on practicing their gender claims and assuming responsibility for the movement, then aiders will never be able to easily face all the calls for help and help. "Aiders need to reflect on their mistakes and face chaos. Otherwise, how can they strive to make progress?"

Lin Man's reflection is that aid providers must clearly know the scope of their abilities and responsibilities, stick to their own bottom line and ethics, know the risks of aid operations, and not be kidnapped by the seekers and public opinion. In the final analysis, it is still a balance between empathy and rationality.

For aid workers, the question "It's always the wolf, should we believe sexual assault accusers?" is a pseudo-question. Li Ying mentioned in a recent lecture that one-third of the sexual assault cases she handled could not be filed or convicted. In reality, false accusations and frame-ups are rare and almost always found. "It's not easy for victims to break their silence. We still have to believe them."