My bad habit: smoking

Let's start with the health hazards of smoking

I always feel a little nervous when I confess that I smoke on Matters, and I will think, "Will it destroy the impression of netizens about myself?" "Will someone come to persuade me to stop smoking?" I feel a little uncomfortable, but still Before I forget, I want to write about why I started smoking and what happened since I started. Other bad habits such as procrastination, habitual avoidance, hoarding, not knowing how to reject people, etc., just wait for the opportunity to write.

In Cantonese, the verbs associated with cigarettes are usually only eat. In written language, I feel a little unaccustomed to smoking. It seems that it will be difficult to choose w.

As written in the abstract, the amount and frequency of my smoking is not actually a habit, but I think that I have smoked at least 20 cigarettes since I started not 30 cigarettes, which seems to be a large number. For the odds and ends of non-smokers. After the first pack of cigarettes, I bought a second pack and left it at home halfway through. I still remember the last time I took the draw, it was exactly a month ago, on October 16th, after going to my boyfriend’s brother’s wedding and wedding banquet, I was inexplicably depressed when I got home. After removing the headgear and earrings, I went out again. Downstairs, two cigarettes were lit in the autumn wind. Maybe this circuit of feeling depressed and then smoking can be called a habit. When I think back to the end of September after walking with my boyfriend on the beach during the Mid-Autumn Festival, and after drinking and getting drunk at a craft beer bar in mid-September, I also feel an inexplicable kind of sadness, and then Lighted a cigarette.

I have been taught since childhood that smoking is harmful to health, that smoking can cause cancer, and it will make the nails yellow and the skin worse. There are also a large area of warning patterns and words on the cigarette case. The less world-weary me, the more one health risk, the difference is not so big.

Before smoking real cigarettes, around 2018, I bought a Vitaful e-cigarette with mint and muscadine flavor. Occasionally, I would take it out on the way home by myself and take two puffs. I also puffed two puffs in the room when my roommate in the university dormitory was away, and then left it idle. It's been a long time (by the way, it's another bad habit of mine to not throw away things after buying them). At the end of April and the beginning of May this year, there was a lot of academic pressure. It seems that around mid-April, my boyfriend and I planned to go to the hotel Staycation and relax on the beach on May 1st and 2nd after the end of the semester and a few days before the exam. I thought that I would want to smoke and put the matches in my rucksack (I rarely used a lighter at that time. I used to use it to help light incense when I was a child, but my fingers were burnt and my heart was shocked. I got used to it in the middle one science class. After checking in with a match, I ordered my boyfriend to buy wine, and then took advantage of the alone time in the middle to find a nearby convenience store to buy cigarettes, and then walked back to the hotel to see if there was a rooftop garden/rooftop bar or something. There is a place where I can sit and smoke, I googled it but I can't find it, and then I walked back to the ashtray outside the hotel. Because the hotel is on the beach, the door is super windy, and it took a few matches to light the cigarette. The impression of the first puff of cigarettes is already very vague. It seems that I coughed because I felt a burning sensation. I took two puffs and bit the fruit-flavored popsicles in the cigarette to taste the taste. After half a puff, it was extinguished. When I was walking with my boyfriend that night, I mentioned that I went to buy cigarettes and smoke in the afternoon. I accidentally taught my boyfriend to break it. For some reason, he also went to the convenience store to buy cigarettes and lighters (although he said that he had fantasized about himself. I will try it from time to time, for example, I bought it when I went to Japan for a working holiday) and then smoked together on the way for a walk, went to the beach to chat and smoked a few sticks together. Once you get used to the feeling of smoking and using a lighter, you can't go back to the state where you haven't experienced all of this. Going from zero to one, and continuing from one to the next, is a very different experience. If you haven't smoked for a long time, you will feel that the tobacco taste is stronger, but it will not return to the feeling that you have never smoked. It seems that I smoked a lot in May. After I smoked a pack (there should be two or three sticks for my boyfriend), I bought a pack of the ultra-fine version. I don’t know why I don’t smoke much anymore. It may be that the semester is officially over, and the pressure is not so great after the summer vacation. Bar

Then I have a special impression of a cigarette that I watched the stage play "Big MK Day" with my middle school classmates at the end of June. The MK boy MK sister (little gangster?) in the play can smoke, and then the stage play also said that it resonated with us. When I recalled the passage of Hong Kong, there were obviously many funny scenes, but I laughed and cried. In this mood, I walked out of the Theater of the Academy of Performing Arts and told her that she wanted to smoke on a whim. She originally thought that she would not smoke because she didn't like the smell of smoke and planned to ask if she wanted to dissolve on the spot. Then she rolled a cigarette beside me, and said that she was influenced by her dorm friends in college and started smoking. At first, she bought a box of cigarettes. Later, when the cigarette tax became more and more expensive, she joined them to buy tobacco filters and cigarette paper. She lit a cigarette, and there was a smell of vanilla, which suited her very well. Knowing that this was my second pack of cigarettes, she said, "Let's smoke less before I get addicted, it's not good for my health." When I got home, I took the cigarettes out of the bag and hid them in my room. , The bad habit of smoking stopped for a while.

I moved into the university dormitory at the end of August, and after thinking about it, I decided to keep my cigarettes at home and not take them with me. Although I still use my boyfriend's cigarettes to smoke, it is less convenient and inconvenient than smoking cigarettes from my bag at any time. Then after living in the dormitory, you have to be very careful about all kinds of expenses. A pack of cigarettes is HK$60 (about NT$280), and a lighter is about ten yuan, which can add up to a good meal or a few days of food, so Even if you don't bring cigarettes, you won't buy them... So being poor is really a powerful motivation to quit smoking.

My boyfriend who is a designer occasionally works overtime until the early hours of the morning before coming home. When he comes back after overtime, he usually has a faint smell of smoke on his body, giving him an inexplicable sense of security. Although it seems to be third-hand smoke, the smell of smoke on other people's body will not be very resistant to it, and even a little like it. It was on the piano teacher when I was a child, on my ex-boyfriend, on my current boyfriend, on the clothes I took off... It seems to be another addiction. (My brother is also a smoker, but I always feel that the smell of cigarettes on his body is not so good)