What to do if a couple quarrels at a distance? 5 must-learn communication guides!
All bad words come from the need for love
Why quarrel? Many times it stems from the need for love. Looking forward to being cared about, looking forward to feeling the warmth of love from the other end of the phone, and looking forward to the solidity of a partner beside me, but long-distance love is often difficult because of the gap in time and space.
Have you had a similar experience? The arguing through the phone screen is red and red, as if all patience has been exhausted for each other, and then the inner voice will say, "Maybe a tight hug, a soft apology in the ear, and a warm kiss can resolve each other's relationship. Conflict, but TA just couldn't come right by."
How to "communicate and reconcile" in a long-distance quarrel is a subject that must be learned . Below, we have compiled 5 communication guides that long-distance couples must learn in quarrels. May we use love to understand each other around our partners.
5 Communication Guides You Must Learn When Long-distance Couples Fight
Let it Go to achieve the purpose of communication
- Quarrel is to express our desire for love and to know more about each other's true thoughts, not a game of who wins and who loses (what if you lose and you win the world).
- Remind yourself not to be a slave to your emotions , avoid aggressive attitudes or vexatious quarrels, and instead clarify your needs for management (wanting more company, insecurity, etc.).
- After achieving the purpose of communication, don't make extra troubles, leave time for each other to breathe and repair their feelings, and at the same time give your partner a step down, so that things can end safely.
Empathy, looking at problems from a partner's point of view
- Most of the long-distance couples can only rely on their mobile phones to comfort each other in the most humble way. If they always hold an immature attitude or shirk their responsibilities, they will surely suffer even more.
- Our suggestion is to "think from the other person's point of view and look at the problem from the other person's point of view" , maybe you will see the difficulties of your partner, and you will even be surprised to find that 100% sincerity.
- Short story sharing : Once Ms. Z got angry because Mr. 12 didn’t reply to the message for a long time, but after learning that it was because of the meeting that she couldn’t use her mobile phone, Ms. Z quickly forgave her and asked “are you hungry?” Have you had dinner yet?" He resolved the quarrel and warmed Mr. 12.
Instant communication to let your partner know you care
- Have you ever had the experience of igniting a new round of war just because of "en", "okay", "you're happy"? For long-distance lovers in a quarrel, these words are easy to be interpreted as indifference and insensitivity, and following such emotional understanding will get out of hand.
- Our suggestion is to "seize the moment to communicate in real time and express your true thoughts" , rather than adopt a negative and perfunctory attitude. Remember that quarrels stem from the need for love, so let the other person know you care!
Be a Qualified "Listener"
- Whether it's a quarrel or a partner's unilateral venting of emotions, if they can listen carefully and respectfully, they can make communication more comfortable for each other, and the quarrel will not become more and more intense.
- The most fearful thing about long-distance quarrels is that no one will allow anyone to express their opinions directly . First, they will not achieve the purpose of communication and enter an infinite loop. Second, they may say unintended but hurtful words in the process.
- Our suggestion is to start with the training of "Don't Interject When Your Partner Expresses Your View" (sounds easy, but it's hard to keep your mouth shut), listen and record why your partner is angry and what he cares about. A reply, which helps in effective communication between partners.
Eliminate the estrangement and sincerely apologize for the quarrel
- The most important point of a long-distance quarrel is to draw a satisfying rest . Unlike ordinary couples who can end with a hug and a kiss, what we can do is to sincerely apologize to each other after the quarrel.
- At the moment of quarrel, it is easy for us to say hurtful things and fail to think from the other side’s standpoint. These bumps may bury unexploded bombs of emotional crisis. Therefore, learning to review our irrational self and sincerely apologize to our partner can truly heal The damage caused by quarrels .
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