The joys and sorrows in the time zone, only you know

直樹的流浪之歌
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IPFS
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Even though there will be a lot of sadness and grief along the way, at least you know that you can bear it, and you can put it down when it’s time to let go. You know, growing up has a price.

Everyone lives in their own time zone, no need to compare. But since we have the internet, the world in one hand, and our personal time zone, it has become more murky than ever.


When the originally unknown female runner became a dark horse and won the gold medal of the Asian Championships, a popular song queen has quietly perished with the erosion of cancer cells. The joy of life and the sadness of death, like different channels on TV, can be transferred to the other end of emotions with just a touch of a button.


How can we understand what we should do and what we can do at the moment, and practice it patiently, in the encounter with others that our eyes pass by? In this ever-changing state, it's only natural that our brains get confused by too much information.


By chance, I clicked into Hikaru Utada's interview. Part of the interview talks about how she didn't begin to experience ordinary life until she moved to the UK. The kind of story that starts very late and understands the simple truth of life, it always sounds meaningful. In the interview, it is easy to discover that Utada's intelligence and wisdom.


Hikaru Utada:
I have a real "life" in the UK. When I used to live in Japan, my way of life was not related to "life". I've been writing lyrics and composing my own songs since I was in my teens. I'm very opinionated and I've made a lot of money. While I may look like an independent person, I actually feel like someone else's pet. I hardly ever bought food by myself, nor rented a house by myself, and even the bank account was handled by someone else, I just knew that I had an account. Whether it's a mobile phone contract, renting a house, or moving, all of them are handled by a brokerage company.
If you care about other people's eyes, you will feel that what you are doing doesn't feel like real behavior, and you will lose some part of the essence of your behavior. Even if you want to live in the present moment and seize the moment, if you take action while caring about others, you will become confused about your original purpose and what you are doing. As long as I think that I will be able to do nothing, maintain the state of life from the beginning of work at the age of 15 until old age, I feel very scared. I thought I had to grow in this part, so I moved to London and started a "normal life". In London I did everything myself and for the first time I actually felt what it was like to live a good life on my own.
I think "life" is an absolute must-have experience in order to have self-confidence. Because I can’t grow just by doing what I’m good at, so I devote myself to experiencing the life of ordinary people, otherwise I don’t know what other people take for granted every day. And what kind of life constitutes the foundation of society, and what kind of structure does the world rely on.


These three passages remind me of my own growth process, and there are some similarities.


When I was a child, I was a video gamer, and my family didn't control the game time, so in addition to music, I mostly played video games in my leisure life. As the next generation of consoles came out, I enjoyed it all the way until I graduated high school.


My mother is very good at taking care of housework and rarely asks me to do chores, so naturally I really know nothing, except that I should study and entertain myself. Later, because of video games, anime and Japanese dramas, I fell in love with Japanese culture, and the university entered the youth track of the Japanese department, which can be said to be a typical otaku growth history.


But when I went to college and left Taipei to come to Taichung, I gradually realized the breadth of the real world, and I started to try many things like crazy. Running clubs, working part-time, falling in love, I didn't miss any of the things I should experience in campus life. I also realize more and more that communicating with all kinds of people is always rewarding and fun.


In my senior year, I went to Kyoto as an exchange student. Living as a poor international student, I learned to cook. Only then did I know that cooking for myself was unspeakable satisfaction. Although I have a student loan and I still owe a living allowance for studying abroad, I have been working and earning living expenses since my sophomore year, and I can be considered financially independent.


So, in the short five months of my study abroad career, I have experienced everything from survival to life, and I have realized that the so-called grown-up is a person who can be independent in economy and life.


Even though there will be a lot of sadness and grief along the way, at least you know that you can bear it, and you can put it down when it’s time to let go. You know, growing up has a price.


Even in the halo of the afternoon, only you can clearly see your own joys and sorrows. You will still be thankful that at least you stick to your time zone and plan for what happens next, without a moment's hesitation.

2019.5 Helsinki Cathedral & Lords Square


CC BY-NC-ND 2.0

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直樹的流浪之歌一名喜歡戲劇與跑步的日文翻譯, 一名熱愛旅行與書寫的街頭藝人。 民謠|書寫|行旅|全馬|劇場 Matters文章索引: https://nice-crayfish-628.notion.site/d848efa3d05d45b5ba89ebbaee03a020
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