【It's logical】——Lucky I'm in love with my best friend

When working in a different place, Li Donghai often thinks of Li Hezai. It's not that he misses him deeply, but it is like countless needles piercing his heart in turn, and he misses him painfully and undeniably.

When he was free, Lee Donghae would ask Lee Hyukjae, "Can you talk on the phone?" But Lee Hyukjae often didn't respond. He would send time-limited messages, but he didn't reply to Lee Donghae's messages.

In the past, Lee Donghae was a straight-line player. Even if Lee Hyukjae ignored him, he could approach him again and again. If Lee Hyukjae didn't answer the question, he would ask again and again until Lee Hyukjae couldn't take it anymore and finally answered him. He would slap Lee Hyuk Jae with a smile, "You have to say it sooner or later, why didn't you answer me sooner?"

Li Hezai is very easy to make trouble with him. Even if he has a cold face, he is not really angry. The strength to push Donghai away is always small. He knows that he will give in eventually, but the process of pushing and pulling must be done. People open their hearts.

Several years have passed since this push and pull. Before they knew it, they were all in their thirties. Li Donghai, who used to be brave and enthusiastic, gradually cooled down. Whether it was psychological or physical, he felt his energy was passing, a kind of As he got older and felt a sense of powerlessness over everything around him, he could feel that he was getting tired, and he gradually became less interested in everything.

He never thought that looking down on everything would make his feelings fade, but it was as if night would come after sunset, and his attitude towards Li Hezai was gradually changing.

In the past, if Li Hezai didn't reply to his messages, when he saw Li Hezai, Li Donghai would definitely pounce on him like a kitten with fried fur. , until Li Hezai couldn't bear to throw him off, he just gave up, and finally didn't forget to stare at Li Hezai and said, "If you ignore me next time, it will be over."

Of course there will be a next time, but Li Hezai let him make trouble, and when Donghae hugged him, his gums were secretly showing his smile. In fact, Li Hejae liked to make trouble like this, Li Donghai thought so, anyway, the way they get along is like this, One overreacted, one pretended to be indifferent.

But now, Li Donghai is tired and has no energy to make trouble. He is no longer as energetic as he was when he was a child, and he no longer has the same power as before, with the power to go all out and cling to people with thick skin. Even if he still has the strength, he is not willing to use it. On Li Hezai, if Li Hezai doesn't give a response, forget it, it's useless to be sincere if you like it.

Looking back on my past self, it is impossible to say not to be wronged.

Li Hezai is as cold as a cellar with the door locked. He seems to be gentle and polite to everyone, but no one can enter his heart. The indifference in private makes the friendliness on the table seem to be faked, but in fact it is very In love, Li Hezai is not a frank or close person, and it is completely different from Li Donghai, who is very affectionate and very sincere.

It was confirmed by the attraction of opposites that there were many teammates who regarded themselves as treasures, but Li Donghai wanted to follow the cold Li Hezai and try his best to cover up this ten thousand year iceberg, as long as it melted a little and treated him a little bit special. Little by little, Li Donghai was so happy that he set off fireworks, and he couldn't hide his eyes full of stars.

Li Donghae spent thousands of days, integrating himself into Li Hejae's life little by little, constantly confirming that Li Hejae was shaken and slowly valuing himself, it really took him a long time to let himself feel for Li Hejae. is special.

But what is all this for?

Today's Li Donghai can't understand, he is sitting by the window at home drinking coffee, looking at the silent mobile phone, lowered his eyes sadly, smiled with difficulty, but did not cry. It's not worth it to cry repeatedly for a person.

After returning to China, Li Donghai did not go to Li Hezai for the first time as before. He went home to watch his mother, brother, and met many members, who appeared in turn on their YouTubes, but he was the only one who didn't go to Lee Hyuk Jae.

There was a message, but the two seemed to agree. No one said that they wanted to meet first. They talked a lot about trivial matters, but the knots in their hearts were stuck between each other, like the ravines in the deep sea. traverse.

They only met when Lit invited them to dinner.

Leeteuk knew that the situation was not right. When he met Li Donghae, the boy who had always been honest and frank when he talked about Li Hezai became timid, his eyes flickered and he didn't dare to look directly at himself. At first glance, there was something in his heart.

Li Hezai was the same, often staring at his phone in a daze, and once did not notice that Li Te was standing behind for a long time. The page of the mobile phone stayed on the chat record with Donghai, and he could guess that there was something wrong with the two of them without asking God for divination.

So Leete invited them to have dinner together, but in the end he escaped by himself, so he fed Heechul the cat. God knows why Heechul needs him to feed the cat.

It's not too embarrassing to say it's embarrassing, but it's not not embarrassing.

The two of them were eating face-to-face, and the conversation was normal, but it seemed strange.

Usually Li Donghae, who talks a lot, will talk a lot, while Li Hezai will make fun of him and call him stupid. The interaction between the two is very naive, like elementary school students. Not sure if they were eating or wrestling with the table.

But this time, they were like mature adults, sitting upright and chatting normally, without slapsticking or playing tricks, just asking each other's life seriously and sharing the current situation. This is very abnormal, at least it was never their way of getting along.

Even though he pretended to be calm on the surface, Lee Hyuk Jae felt uncomfortable about this situation in his heart. He struggled to hold back his sigh and said to Lee Dong Hae with a smile, "You seem to be a lot more mature."

Lee Donghae replied with a smile, "Really?"

But the smile obviously didn't touch the bottom of his eyes, the whole person looked cold, and it was at odds with Li Donghai's warm personality, and the sense of contradiction made the current situation even more strange.

"Well, I don't even know you anymore." Li Hezai said, this time he couldn't even pretend to smile. He looked at Li Donghai, his brows were furrowed, his eyes were full of puzzlement, and his face instantly turned cold.

"Maybe you don't know me very well." Li Donghai still smiled, but his cheeks didn't move, his eyes were obviously unhappy, but he forced himself to slightly raise the corners of his mouth.

"Are you mad at me?" Lee Hyuk Jae looked into Lee Donghae's eyes and was quite sure that he was right.

When Li Donghae looked at Li Hezai, he was often angry because of Li Hezai's indifference, but that anger eventually turned into sadness, and sadness turned into deeper sadness. .

"No, I'm just disappointed." Li Donghai smiled ugly, "I don't know what I mean to you." It was said, the thing that was in my heart, after so many years, finally said it.

Lee Hyuk Jae moved his lips, "You are my best friend."

Lee Donghae sighed, best friend. If it is enough to be friends, it is good if you are not greedy. If he hadn't fallen in love with Lee Hyuk Jae, or if he had given up his crush on Lee Hyuk Jae sooner, maybe their friendship wouldn't have come to an end.

"But I don't just want to be your friend." Li Donghae smiled bitterly, "I didn't want to from the beginning, I don't know if you are really dull or just pretending to be stupid." Li Donghae paused and forced the sour feeling back. Kuang, "But it doesn't matter anymore, I'm going to give up."

"Donghae..." Lee Hyuk Jae's eyes widened and he reached out to grab Lee Donghae's hand.

Li Donghai let him hold it. Li Hezai was flustered, and he was at a loss to say something, but he faltered and couldn't speak.

"It's okay." Lee Donghae patted Lee Hyukjae's hand and pulled his hand back, "Don't worry, we'll get along as usual in the future. I'll handle my feelings myself."

Li Donghai got up, and Li Hezai looked at him, still unable to utter a word. There was nothing to say between them, so pale and powerless, but it cut like a sharp blade that Li Donghai wanted to cry. Li Donghai smiled, obviously decided to let it go, but the bitterness in his heart was still like a whirlpool, trapping him in it and drowning him.

"I like you." Lee Donghae looked into Lee Hejae's eyes, took the confession as a farewell, and turned to leave. Thank you for occupying most of my life, this unrequited love ends here.

Not long after the next meeting, it was the day when the members of the brigade promoted their comeback album.

In the waiting room, Lee Hyuk Jae watched Lee Donghae and the other members sparring, but he ignored him completely and didn't even give him a look. Li Hezai closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, feeling a splitting headache, and his heart was burning with anger. Is this what Lee Donghae calls business as usual?

After growing up, Li Donghai has matured a lot, learned to hide his emotions, and also learned to pretend to be okay in order not to be worried. It used to be very sincere, but gradually he learned to disguise it as seventy, even if he still liked it too much, he still pretended not to care.

He is no longer that noisy and noisy child, and even if something goes wrong, he will no longer pull the corners of his mouth and act willfully.

When his attitude changed, Lee Hyuk Jae was not unaware.

But their way of getting along has always been that Donghae sticks to him, entangles him, and quarrels with him. The always indifferent Li Hezai has long been used to the role of being stuck, entangled, and quarreled. Donghae doesn't treat him like usual, he is helpless. .

I didn't know what to ask, so I continued to get along with Donghai's transformation. It doesn't matter if I don't stick to him anymore, maybe I need my own space. Li Hezai was very uncomfortable. He was drained inside but couldn't shed tears. His life schedule was full but his heart felt extremely empty. These emotions were too private and naked, and he didn't say it to anyone.

So Li Donghai didn't ask more questions or make noise, and Li Hezai didn't delve into his transformation. As a result, Li Donghai confessed to him suddenly, and said that he handled his feelings by himself, posing as if he didn't need Li Hezai to do anything.

don't you like me? Isn't "I" in that sentence? Why don't you agree with me? At the time, he was stunned so he couldn't give a reaction, but after he realized it, the more he thought about it, the more angry he became. He walked up to Li Donghai and said with a dark face, "Let's talk."

Li Donghae was dragged outside the waiting room by Li Hezai, and then pulled into a small room with no one. Li Hezai's face was extremely cold, and at first glance he was angry.

Li Donghae pouted and pulled his hand out of Li Hezai's hand, "Why?"

Li Hezai looked at him and was very angry, "Why are you asking me? Why do you think I am angry?"

"How can I know why you are angry?" Li Donghai asked back, his arms folded around his chest, his eyes half absurd and half cold.

"Li Donghae, have you asked me what I think? When you were confessing, did you ask me what I thought?" Li Hezai was so angry that his speech quickened. He thought of Li Donghai's appearance of quitting his life after his confession, and he felt the whole The man is like a crab thrown into a pressure cooker, trapped, unhappy, and dying.

"Why do you say that your feelings are not reconciled to me? Don't you like me? How can you not be reconciled to me?" Li Hezai's voice gradually became louder and his emotions were high. In fact, he usually doesn't quarrel at all. He wanted to bother to fight. But Li Donghai is different. "Have you asked me about my feelings? How can I get close and far away, suddenly confess and say I want to give up? You also say that your feelings have nothing to do with me! Do you know what you are doing?"

Li Donghae got emotional when he said this, "How can I not know what I'm doing? Li Hezai, I've liked you for so long, have you ever responded? What do you want from me!"

Tears fell from Li Donghai's words, and Li Hezai's eyes turned red. He slowly held his breath, squeezed Li Donghai's shoulder and said, "I never said I didn't like you."

"But you didn't say you like me!" Li Donghai retorted loudly, trying to get rid of Li Hezai's hand that was holding him.

Lee Hyuk Jae didn't let him move, he grabbed Lee Donghae's shoulders harder and looked into his eyes, "I like you."

Li Donghae was stunned, staring at Li Hejae motionless.

Li Hezai sighed, "Isn't the way I get along with you counted as a response? Think about it, why did I tell you my home password, why did I tell you my mobile phone password, why did I only watch the sunrise with you, and why are there so many members but Just waiting for you to get off work, why I only spend Christmas alone with you, why do I take you back to Mokpo in the new year...Aren't these a response?"

Li Donghai still looked at Li Hezai motionless, with disbelief written on his face.

"I thought you would understand, I thought you would know that I like you. Now it seems that it's really just my own opinion." Lee Hyuk Jae laughed as if mocking himself, with tears in his eyes.

"But..." Li Donghai finally recovered his voice after a while, "You don't even answer my calls. There is a time limit."

"Haihai, did you forget that I turned off notifications? I can't see any messages coming, so did I tell you that if you want to talk to me, just call me directly, don't you need to ask?" Li Hezai moved forward , and gently hugged Li Donghai, whose body was stiff, into his arms.

"But, the other day, when I confessed to you, you didn't say anything." Li Donghai spoke intermittently, his nasal voice was heavy, and he shrank in Li Hezai's arms and wept silently.

"I really didn't expect you to confess that day. I thought you were mad at me for something, but you suddenly said that you didn't want to be just a friend. You said a series of things I didn't expect, and then you said that you were going to give up and let me Don't worry about it. At that time, it was really unexpected, I didn't know how to respond and let you go." Li Hezai tightened his arms and put his arms around him, "I'm sorry."

"But...you've always been cold, Hejae, how could I know that you like me." Li Donghae's previous grievances left a scar in his heart, he clearly remembered how his hot face and cold buttocks had to be accepted by Li Hezai. He, and Li Hezai's heart wall is as solid as a rock, causing him to suffer a lot.

"My personality is very cold, but Haihai, look at my actions, didn't I use my actions to prove that you are important to me? Only you can come and go in and out of my house at will, only you and I are willing to pick up and drop off at any time, I only work with you. You watch the sunrise, and the important festivals will only be with you." Li Hezai put his face on Li Donghai's hair and wrapped him tightly.

Li Donghai suddenly froze.

Li Hezai was just not good at words, but he was someone who needed a commitment to feel at ease, so he felt that Li Hezai was too cold, and even felt that Li Hezai was extra tolerant to himself just because he was too annoying.

But Lee Hyuk Jae is not someone who relaxes his bottom line just because he is annoyed. It is because it is Li Donghai that he is willing to break the principle.

Li Donghai breathed a sigh of relief, and what Li Hezai said at the moment calmed his anxiety, but he still didn't want the same way of getting along.

"Then, can you talk more in the future?"

"What?" Li Hezai looked down at Li Donghai, and reached out to brush the bangs off Li Donghai's forehead.

"Your heart. Although actions are important, words are also important. I often don't know what you're thinking." Li Donghai bit his lower lip. Li Hezai seldom said that his mind was really a problem, and he was too reclusive.

"I see, I promise you, I will change it slowly." Li Hezai agreed.

"And don't be so cold. If I ignore you, you can come to me, right? You don't have to be me clinging to you."

"I see. I thought you wanted to have your own space, and I wanted to find you, but I was afraid that you didn't want to see me..." Li Hezai's voice weakened, a little aggrieved.

"I always want you to come to me." Lee Donghae hugged Lee Hyukjae tightly, "You have to come closer to me and pester me a little more, understand?"

"Got it." Lee Hyuk Jae kissed Lee Donghae's hair. "Is there anything else I should change?"

"Just stick to me more. Like I used to stick to you." Li Donghai finally felt more at ease, and rubbed against Li Hezai's arms.

"Then can I stay at your house today?" Li Hezai reached out and squeezed Li Donghae's ear and touched it lightly. Li Donghae's ear immediately turned red.

"I just confessed to each other... it's not good." At this time, Li Donghai became more reserved, avoiding Li Hezai's hand, trying to get out of his arms.

Lee Hyuk Jae hugged him and didn't let him slip away, so he deliberately pretended to be unhappy and said, "We used to sleep together, what's the point. Why are we together like this."

"Are we together?" Li Donghai looked up, confused.

"Don't you want to be with me?" Lee Hyuk Jae asked softly, then remembering that Lee Donghae had told him to talk more from his heart, he added, "I want to be with you."

Li Donghai's face flushed a shade of red, and he whispered and said intermittently, "Then... well, let's be together, let's be together."

In the end, for the first time, Li Hezai rubbed against Li Donghae, and used the method that Li Donghae used to stick to him, and moved into Li Donghae's house.

"I'm so excited to live at my boyfriend's house." Lee Hyuk Jae deliberately surrounded Lee Donghae from behind and whispered into his ear.

Li Donghae jumped up like a ghost and shook off Li Hezai's hand, "Then what, what I said before to stick to me doesn't count, you don't have to stick to me."

Looking at the frightened Li Donghae, Li Hezai raised the corner of his mouth and smiled wickedly, "Why, I'm afraid you can't stand it yourself?"

"Who can't take it anymore!" Li Donghai shouted loudly, posing as if he was going to eat people, but he softened again, "It's too strange for you to be like this now."

"What's so strange? What's wrong with me sticking to my boyfriend?" Li Hezai leaned forward again and took Li Donghai into his arms. After being entangled by Li Donghai for so many years, he had already figured out the essentials of Li Donghai's stickiness. .

"I want to stick to my boyfriend, can't I?" Li Hezai lowered his head and bit Li Donghai's ear, and licked it gently with the tip of his tongue, causing Li Donghai's neck to turn red, twisting to escape from Li Hezai's arms.

"Lee Hejae, let me go..." Li Donghae begged for mercy, and the physiological tears were forced out. Li Hezai was shocked, bad, he couldn't help it when he saw Li Donghae begging for pity. So he let go, and Li Donghai slipped out of his embrace and stood opposite him.

"I'm going to take a shower." Li Donghai's face turned red and white, white and red, took several deep breaths, and finally walked to the bathroom.

Li Hezai smiled, his little tiger was so cute, he couldn't stand it if he was teased. Looking down at the swollen desire under him, Li Hezai's Adam's apple rolled and he sighed, hey, in fact, it was the same for himself.

When sleeping at night, Li Donghai didn't sleep next to him or in his arms like before, but slept on the far side of the bed, almost falling off.

Li Hezai sighed, rolled to Li Donghai's side, pulled the man into his arms, and dragged him to the middle of the bed.

"I won't do anything to you, fool." Lee Hyuk Jae flicked Lee Donghae's forehead with his fingers and pressed a gentle kiss, "Sleep well."

Li Donghai breathed out at this moment, and his whole face turned red.

"Whatever...it's not impossible." After a while, a small voice came from his arms, but Li Hezai heard it clearly.

Li Hezai laughed and held his breath, "Who was so scared just now? Avoid me so far."

"Then... I'm sorry, I'm shy." Lee Donghae buried his face in Lee Hyukjae's chest and hugged his boyfriend's waist tightly.

"There's nothing right now, you're going to be in pain." Li Hezai said in a low voice, forcibly suppressing his desire. Donghae had already made him want to do something in his arms. After hearing Donghae's words, his whole body started to heat up.

"I'm not afraid of pain." Li Donghai raised his head, his bright eyes looked very firm, as if he wouldn't sleep if he didn't do something big tonight.

Li Hezai laughed again, pity and helplessness, "But I'm afraid you will hurt."

He lowered his head and kissed the tip of Li Donghai's nose, "Go to sleep now, there are still many days to come, don't worry." Li Hezai gently hugged Li Donghai in his arms, and patted his back gently, coaxing him to sleep.

Li Donghai rolled his eyes and closed his eyes obediently. Yes, there are still many days to come, so don't be in a hurry. He opened his eyes again, raised his head and kissed Lee Hyuk Jae's chin.

"Hezai, thank you." Thank you for being willing to change for me. Thank you for being willing to do a little more when I'm tired, so that I can feel at ease.

After a long silence, Li Donghai thought that Li Hezai had fallen asleep, but suddenly heard his clear response, "I love you very much."

Li Donghai's eyes were hot, and he buried his head in their embrace, "Me too."