just write

I have seen a saying that if 2020 is the first year of the new crown, it has been three years since the new crown. If it is measured by youth, all middle school students have graduated. Recently, I was reading "The Order of Time". Although I stopped reading, I even spent a lot of time thinking, but I have some new understanding of "time". However, I still feel that the world we are in, in this timeline, the speed of the passage of time has been silently speeded up. I can still remember what I was like when I came to Beijing ten years ago and some small things that happened, but I don't remember much about the past three years, when I had a happier life than before.

Instead, more and more thoughts, thoughts and confusions are constantly accumulating in the brain. Although I didn't have so many dreams on the night I took zopiclone, I still felt exhausted after waking up. The memory seems to be fading too, and the memories are all things that are long and unimportant. Since I was diagnosed with moderate depression and moderate anxiety in 2016, Prozac seems to have not brought me much improvement. Although my mood is stable, the problems that exist in my mind are only more or less. Including, thinking that this is not my own problem or that the environment is attached to my problem will also become a new problem that plagues me.

Not to mention those long-term questions about the future of life, how to keep commuting to and from get off work, when my mind wanders, when I see a few words from others... all of a sudden I was caught.