The book I've read "The Power of Changing Minds" Author: Lai Peixia

Due to my personal experience, I have been actively looking for books on spiritual counseling with the aim of developing my own mind. By chance, I came across Teacher Lai Peixia's new book "The Power of Changing Minds". I believe that Taiwanese people know Lai Peixia from the fact that she is a senior Taiwanese artist, singer, actress, etc. And my understanding of her is from "I Want to Talk to You" recommended by the shooter Tingting's mom.

Before I start to share my post-reading thoughts, I would like to share this Buddha-hearted, heart-warming author and teacher-Dr. In addition to writing, Dr. Lai Peixia is also the chairman of the Taiwan Chinese Well Talk Society . Mr. Lai also runs a channel on YouTube. Every Monday and Friday, there will be live sharing sessions at 9:00 pm. Interested friends can visit Dr. Lai Peixia's channel to let us learn physical and spiritual growth together. In addition, friends who have listened to PODCAST can also follow the voice of the teacher holding hands like me - learn happiness with Lai Peixia . Trust me, you'll get the hang of it.

After reading the book "The Power of Changing Minds", I really felt full of Dharma joy . I believe that many of my friends have encountered unpleasant life experiences and setbacks like me. Even after many years have passed, these experiences will still come to our minds from time to time and linger. It's like our hands and feet are tightly bound, and we struggle but can't get rid of it. Many times I bring up the past with the people around me, and the reply I get is that it's been so long, why can't you let it go? I have tried to ask myself, am I unable to let go? But usually we only hear "let go" or "look away", but no one teaches us how to let go, and no one tells you how to let go, and there is no fixed formula that guides us to let go.

But you and I are very lucky because Teacher Lai Peixia has launched this book "The Power of Changing Minds". The homework of changing minds instructed in it is a complete set of logic and specific implementation steps, rather than vague "put down" and "look away". Mr. Lai is the American spiritual mentor Byron. Based on "The Work" designed by Byron Katie, it introduces readers to the mindfulness of mindfulness method step by step.

In the book, Mr. Lai emphasized that although this book is about changing minds, again, it is not to turn bad thoughts into good ones, but to turn pessimism into optimism or to advocate positive psychology. After reading this book, you will understand that all troubles and worries actually come from our thoughts. Many people are afraid to make changes, and everyone has already set the idea of "the country is easy to change and the nature is difficult to change". In the book, the teacher mentioned a sentence that sounded harsh but impressed me: "It's not that there is no way to make ourselves better, but that we don't want to make ourselves better. "

Normal people will have emotions. In many cases, it is not that there is no emotion, but all the worldly restrictions make us have to suppress our emotions just to avoid being criticized as glass hearts and so on. In fact, such repression does not mean that emotions do not exist, and therefore causes great harm to our body and mind. For example: depression, anxiety, etc. These are all mental illnesses caused by emotions.

Regarding emotions, we must :

1. understand emotions

2. focus on emotions

3. admit emotions

As long as we can find the main belief that triggers the emotion, do the homework of unchaining. You must be wondering what kind of beliefs need to be turned? In the book, the teacher mentioned that all thoughts that hurt us and bring us pain are worth turning. Rethinking your homework is a way to help us free our minds and bodies .

Next, I would like to share the four major questions of re-reading homework :

· Turn to Homework Step 1 ── " Really? Is this true? "

· Turn to Step 2 of your homework - " Can I be sure this is true? "

· Turn to Step 3 of the homework ─ " How do I react when I have this thought? "

· Turn to Step 4 of the homework ──“ What kind of person am I when I don’t have this thought? ”

· Inversion: Turn " he shouldn't " into " I shouldn't "

Here's my personal turnaround homework - freeing myself from a failed marriage and betrayal

Turn to Homework Step 1──" Really? Is this true? "

He shouldn't hurt me and cheat on my feelings.

Question : Really? is this real?

My answer : true

Turn to Homework Step 2──" Can I be sure this is true? "

My answer : I'm pretty sure it's true, how could he deceive me and betray me?

Turn back to Homework Step 3──“ How should I react when I have this thought? ”

Once this thought came up, I would feel inferior because I was divorced. Just hearing my ex-husband's name fills me with resentment and dissatisfaction. Stiff and short of breath. I don't want to be there as long as he's there. Because I absolutely hate his irresponsible behavior. I'm very dissatisfied, it's not me who did the wrong thing, but it's me who is misunderstood. I think he ruined my reputation.

Turn to Homework Step 4──" What kind of person am I when I don't have this thought? "

I am extremely happy, happy like a child. I felt immense freedom and no burden in my heart. I can be myself, not bound by anyone. I am grateful for everything I have now, the people I love and the people who love me. Every day is very fulfilling.

Use the teacher Lai's method of questioning the students. Let me also ask myself: Do you like the former self or the latter self.

My answer is definitely the latter self, I don't like myself full of negative energy.

Inversion: Turn " he shouldn't " into " I shouldn't "

The next reversal is not easy. But for my physical and mental freedom, I have to try to change " he shouldn't " to " I shouldn't "

1. Now that divorce is a fact, I shouldn't let my past experience stand in the way of my happiness.

2. I should not use his fault to punish myself. You are not happy today, and people still live their good life without pain, so why bother?

3. I shouldn't hurt myself. I should know how to love myself more than before.

Once again, the lesson of changing minds is to teach us to turn bad thoughts into good ones, and the intention is to let go of the bound self. Instead of turning bad things into good things . What has happened is a fact, we have no ability to change the fact. I love the little stories in the book:

Prisons lock up prisoners and send guards to supervise and punish those who break the law. It seems that the guards are freer. From this perspective, who exactly is imprisoned? Who is poorer? It's like to make sure that the other person is going to be miserable and we're going to be locked up with him too, is there really a winner in this outcome? This world is really big and vast. If you want to avenge the two hundred and five hundred and fifty one arrow in front of you, but let yourself stay outside the iron cage and miss freedom and happiness, you will know that this is really not a very smart approach. Therefore, learning the lesson of changing minds, this set of tools, can help us make choices clearly, and avoid the decision that "injuring the enemy a thousand, self-injuring eight hundred" is not worthwhile because of thoughts and anger.

Conclusion: When a bad thought arises, ask yourself first, can I do what I ask others to do? For example, moral theory is that we should not lie, but in fact no one is not a lie. You obviously don't have a good time outside, but you always report good news to your parents instead of bad news. This is actually a lie. Then, ask yourself what is the best choice for you ? Let us all learn to change our minds together.

Happiness is the goal, change is the method.

Don't be kidnapped by thoughts, choose your life and let your mind be free