Writing is speaking with a pen｜The flower language of yellow roses

From Conflicting Text to Embrace

Probably from when I started to contact reading and literature, and I have to say that this part is explained with the story of the period from the age of 17 to 21. But this story is so long!

It must be said that I am not a child who can read. After graduating from middle school, I didn't go to school, commonly known as a dropout. In that era, after the "joint entrance examination", I didn't even take the waitlist, so I decided not to go to school anymore. Although my first choice at the time was "Rejuvenation Artist", because I loved reading manga and drawing, I had a vision to be a manga artist at that time. But I have a self-knowledge that even if I am good at drawing technical subjects, my subjects must be very bad, so I gave up.

the flashing sound

After that, Ma Ji, a middle school student, said that he was going to "Kaohsiung" to form a gang, and asked me if I wanted to join us? I say yes!

In this way, I ran away from home and went to Kaohsiung with Ma Ji. Follow him and do the "surrounding things" in his relative's "barbering center"; to put it better, it is "surrounding things", but it is actually a younger brother, and it has been like this for half a year. One day after half a year, a group of us stayed in a hotel in Nanzi. Outside the window, we could see white smoke from the chimneys, and the air was foggy. Even now at the age of "sitting four and looking five", every time I think of that moment, I still feel amazing.

That morning, I woke up earlier than everyone else, drowsy eyes, and after grooming, everyone else was still sleeping, suddenly I stared blankly at the white air outside the window, and at a glance, the foggy city, Factory chimneys rise in smoke. Suddenly a voice flashed in my mind; is this life meaningful?

Looking back at the past, I often think, is that flashing voice or thought my own? Or is there some kind of guidance?

I've always been very grateful for that voice, otherwise... I wouldn't be in a PhD class right now. If I looked at me back then, I would probably say "how is it possible" in surprise.

Apprenticeship begins

Because of that sentence, I picked up the phone and called my mother, who was in Taichung. Because of this, I left that group of people, left Kaohsiung, and went to Taichung.

My mother told me that it doesn't matter if you can't read, at least you have to learn a skill. He asked a friend to introduce me to a western restaurant as an apprentice. Let me talk about it first, my mother! She ran away from home earlier than me, and I would run away from home. To a large extent, when she left, she told me, "Life is your own, don't delay yourself because of your father." That is another story, and I have the opportunity to write it to you again.

Since then, I have been an apprentice in a western restaurant, starting from the most basic, washing dishes! Slowly I started to make salads, how to arrange the plate, make pickled shredded cabbage, and mix various salad dressings. Only then did I realize that apart from some special sauces, most of the salad dressings are basically "mayonnaise", cherry Sauce, peach sauce, Caesar sauce, Thousand Island sauce, all the bases are "mayonnaise", so it is very important to learn how to mix "mayonnaise".

When you have a Chinese girlfriend

After being an apprentice in a western restaurant for about half a year, everything was on track and I was learning slowly. In a restaurant, the kitchen becomes the infield, and the waiters outside are called the outfield. I believe that college students who worked 2 or 30 years ago should all know it, and here is the key point, college students who work part-time. The turnover rate of the restaurant is very high, and a large proportion are college students who come to work, so as colleagues, our kitchen will of course communicate with these college students.

Finally getting to the point, when will I start writing. I am very fortunate that when I was an apprentice at that time, I only graduated from middle school, but I was able to have a girlfriend of a Chinese university student. This is something to brag about among colleagues.

Even years later, I am proud of it. It is a great honor for me, a Chinese university girl, to give you four years of the golden age of university! Pure love in youth, a love full of differences, this is another story. I won't say much about it for now. If you want to know more, give me more encouragement or leave a message below, maybe I can write a novel.

When you have a Chinese-speaking girlfriend, to be honest, even if you only have a high school degree, it is difficult not to get in touch with literature. The first literary works I came into contact with were Teacher Bai Xianyong's "Nice Son", and then "Taipei People". ". Since I am a second generation from another province, I have more personal experience with the description of Mr. Bai Xianyong. It was also during that period that the opportunity to read a lot of literary works began.

Learning to write is important for girlfriends

As I said before, I love reading comics very much. Besides comics, I also like to read miscellaneous books. In short, textbooks cannot. Growing up, I have always told others that I personally feel that learning from comics is no less than reading books and writing. I read all kinds of comics, boys, girls, professionals, and realism. The world of comics has established my cognitive foundation, so my words can always be meaningful.

When it comes to writing, I believe it should not be difficult for everyone to guess that in that era when computers and the Internet were not yet popular, apart from communication, meeting, dating and chatting, the only thing left was writing letters. Just imagine everyone, when you want to write a letter to your girlfriend, and she is a Chinese student, what can you do?

it is good! I admit my words are ugly! But people don't care!

But I will care about it. In fact, more or less, under such a difference, I will inevitably feel inferior. So what to do? After much deliberation, I had to start with writing, how to write? I am a person who graduated from middle school with little literary accomplishment, so I am really very cautious. Maybe a little bit of talent though! After reading, as mentioned in the preface, a teacher said "writing is speaking with a pen", and since then I suddenly realized that writing is actually not that difficult.

Even, the one that impressed me the most was a big quarrel with a Chinese girl. In the past, the other party broke up, and this time it was me. Due to the long-term personal inferiority complex and the difference in growth between the two. We all know that many times, when men and women quarrel, occasionally the woman will always blurt out angrily, we broke up, we are not suitable for angry words. And what about men? Either take it seriously, or use all your might to coax the other party, and then let it go.

The flower language of yellow roses

This time is different, I really feel that maybe the two shouldn't be together, maybe I should let her go. And after I said that, she stayed silent and sat on the sofa. And I continued to say goodbye coldly, and then left, I could feel her pain in writing, but I kept telling myself that it was right, it was for her good!

At that time, the summer vacation of her junior year was approaching. After the vacation, we did not contact each other again. Until my birthday, I personally didn't care much about it, but from waking up to going to work that day, I always had a strange feeling in my heart, I couldn't tell, I was bored, and I don't know why. However, he intuitively felt that today she, a Chinese girl, would appear. At that time, he was no longer in the restaurant, and he went to work with an uneasy heart until he rested at noon. The outside field is like a kitchen broadcast. I am looking for someone outside, and my scalp is numb. Who is it? When I walked to the counter, I saw a Chinese woman holding a bunch of yellow roses. She looked thin. In the past, my nickname for her was "fat", but in fact he was not fat, just plump. However, seeing her thin, I felt a tingling pain in my heart; walking down in front of her and looking at her slightly sunken cheeks, my eyes felt slightly swollen and flustered.

I was stunned, watching her hand the yellow rose to me, and I reached out to take it. Then she looked at me and said "Happy Birthday" with a smile. I couldn't imagine what my own expression was like at the moment, but my mind was almost blank. I didn't know what else she said, only to hear the last sentence "You can let me Hug?".

Then she approached me and hugged me, panicking, and I blurted out, "Are you going to watch a movie tonight?", and scolded myself ten thousand times in my heart, "Go north! What are you talking about".

After the hug, she said lightly, "No, I have something to do tonight." Then she turned around and left with her classmates. I froze at the counter for a while before turning back to the kitchen. Since it was still a break, when I took the yellow rose to the lounge, I suddenly found that there was a letter inside. I open it and take out the letter, five or ten seconds! My eyes flowed down, and my heart was full of unpleasant depression. The content of the letter is that her recent situation in the past three months, and finally her letting go. . .

The flower language of the yellow rose: For love, the yellow rose is an ominous thing, because it represents jealousy, lost love and disappearing love, and even an expression of jealousy.

Turning the tide in writing

For the flower language of yellow roses, you may find it strange. That's right! She was jealous, and she also gave up. After breaking up with her, I quickly got together with another girl. I have to apologize to that girl! I have no love for him, maybe it's really just a substitute, or to make the Chinese girl give up, because I know that she can still know my message through some relationship.

After reading the letter, I cried for a while, right in the kitchen, and even my chef came to hug me without saying a word. I asked the chef for a leave of absence, rode the FZR to the girls' dormitory in her university, and asked the dorm room if she was there, and he said he didn't know. I stood at the door of the dormitory. Students came and went from about 2:00 p.m. to almost 6:00 p.m. During this period, I met her college classmate. By the way, do you know where he is? No news either.

In the evening, when I saw her coming back, I hurriedly stepped forward and looked at her without knowing what to say for a while, and the Chinese girl looked at me too; I said uneasy, "Let's get back together!", I really don't know what to say. Suddenly she looked at me and said, "You can get back together, you can bring her to me and give her a slap"... I was stunned for a while, and I am often stunned today. I thought to myself how is that possible! So I blurted out "you might as well give me a slap".

Snapped! A crisp sound. A hot feeling came from the cheeks, and the ears roared, buzzing, buzzing, buzzing. She went back to the dormitory without turning her head, and I was stunned again, standing blankly outside the door of the dormitory. The students of men and women came and went, and I seemed to be able to feel strange eyes.

It's hard to describe how I feel after leaving on my FZR, regret? Guilt? Uncomfortable? Heartache? Should I call myself stupid? Returning home with mixed feelings. I thought to myself, "That's probably it!", "Deserving it".

The whole thing is full of remorse, but it is also very clear why I did it. After calming down for a while, I made up my mind, yes, I hurt her, I'm sorry for her, I want to let him know this feeling. After calling the chef like he took three days off, I plan to go out for a walk. But before that, I have to apologize to the Chinese girl, I want to know that she knows how much I love her!

It took me all night to write a three-sheet letter, which I folded and put in an envelope. I rode the FZR to the girls' dormitory again. There were two mailboxes outside the dormitory. I put the letter in and left.

I got on the train and I went to Tainan. Since I started apprenticeship and gradually got on the track, my mother moved to Tainan and I wanted to see him.

When I arrived in Tainan, I stayed with my mother for almost two days. It can be said to be recuperating! However, on the afternoon of the second day, suddenly, my mother told me that she had my phone number, and I thought to myself, how could it be possible? No one here knows about my mom, let alone calling me. A burst of blessing to the soul, right? Are you a Chinese woman? Why are you calling?

I answered the phone, picked up the phone, hello! In an instant, there was a burst of crying on the other end of the phone, and the Chinese woman said bitterly, "Why are you doing this! You made people so they don't know what to do!" I felt joy in my heart, I just felt that there was a chance, what chance? Of course there is a chance of reconciliation.

I went on to say, "What's wrong with you? I'll go back in the afternoon, don't cry", "Are you coming to pick me up?" On the other end of the phone, I was sobbing and saying ok. After hanging up the phone, I hurriedly packed my luggage and went to the train station to take the train.

the power of words

Yes! This was the first time I felt the power of words. It also made me interested in writing. Of course, I also know very well that I am not a writer, and I never thought of becoming a writer. Like a team writer, I want to be a cartoonist. But I fully feel the power of words, which is different from words and images. Read between the lines, use words to express what you want to express, and when this expression can be received and understood, its energy can work miracles.

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