040｜My rules of daily life

"Sense of control" is the core source of "sense of security".

The sense of security in life comes from "controlling", "being in the knowability of self-choice", that is, I know what I can choose, and I have the right to choose.

Realizing that you have choices creates a healthy sense of "control". Within a certain range, it has adjustable elastic flexibility. For example, the craving for fried chicken today may be due to the recent stress at work. I choose to eat fried chicken to relax, and I also know to eat in moderation. The true sense of "control" is "making choices" and "knowing boundaries", with "self" rather than "others".

Losing a sense of control over your life is not because of your low socioeconomic status. The truth is that socioeconomic status is not necessarily linked to one's sense of control over one's life.

So how do you build a "sense of control" in your daily life? My own experience is to start with the tiniest details of everyday life and "create your own daily routines (Daily Routines)." There are two principles:

1. This rule allows you to gain joy and peaceful emotional energy

2. This rule applies only to yourself, not to others

The following are my "5 daily rules" (slowly increasing...)

1. When you get home from work, take a shower first and restart the "home mode" of your body and mind.

After a busy day at get off work, many people have experienced the baptism of commuting and traffic jams. When they get home, they really want to spread out on the sofa and use their mobile phones to play shit, order takeaway first, and then start the latest drama... Before I know it, it's early morning, The good day is over... Is this really good?

My method is, when I get home (if you have pets like me, you should take care of them first), the first thing is to remove makeup and take a bath. Body cleaning can not only wash away the dirt from the body, but also awaken the mind. Just through such a small ceremony, the body and mind can be switched to the "home mode", and the comfortable aroma can also restore some emotional energy.

2. Set your own "Unplugged time"

A routine I've been trying to set up recently is to disconnect all networks, including mobile phones, after 10 o'clock. You may experience extremely uncomfortable emotional states such as "anxiety" and "fear" at first, but trust me, after they pass, you will experience "peace" that you have never had before.

3. Cultivate "non-consumption" as a "hobby"

Thanks to the fact that New Zealand's business is not very developed, it is quite easy to say "no consumption" here. On weekdays, try to prepare lunch by yourself, try to bring coffee from home every day, and drink less take-away drinks such as milk tea 🧋.

The point here is not "not spending", but "hobbies". When you study the method of "saving money" from the perspective of cultivating interest, you will find that life is full of places to practice your creativity.

4. When listening to music, turn on the headphones to the maximum volume. (with volume protection of course)

There are two reasons:

It's not fair to your overpriced earphones if the music isn't on max.

It is not fair to the music if the music is not turned on to the maximum.

Don't get distracted by co-workers' chatter and office conversations, and focus on your work.

Don't worry, all you'll miss is gossip.

5. Do it first and then regret it (without breaking the law 🤣)

This article is especially suitable for me, who is "perfectionist syndrome". I used to struggle between "doing" and "don't do it", and was pulled by this entanglement and negative emotions. A rule of thumb that has been practiced recently is "Do what you think you want to do first," because at the end of the day, time is the only "asset" that cannot be restored.

As for if you really regret it, isn't it good? Life would be boring if there were no regrets.

Summarizing your own rules of life is a very fun thing. By creating these rituals, you can make yourself feel more "in control" of your life. Again, life is flexible and changeable, and the rules of life are constantly changing. Isn't it interesting to see your own growth through changes?

How about you? Do you have any rules of your own? No matter how small or insignificant, it is very important to you.

May you become a better version of yourself and gain peace and love.

 About Korgi Chu (Grilled Chicken)
International Coach Federation ICF Certified Life Coach / Rainbow Coach 🌈
(Member number 009600446I) 👉🏻 The personal website is committed to promoting the "output" thinking system, and using "output" to promote the growth of more people.
The topics I focus on are: gay issues, LGBT issues, personal growth, self-care, self-worth exploration, building a personal brand, career transition, efficient learning methods, and financial freedom.
And everything that can make you a better version of yourself.

May everyone become a better version of themselves and gain peace and love.
Contact me: korgicoaching@gmail.com