My Open Marriage/Open Relationship Practice Record

Open a thread and talk about the recently started open marriage practice.

Basic situation: My husband is European and lives in Europe together. They have known each other for ten years and are currently married for five years. At present, they have just started to open up their relationship for more than a month, and both of them are dating others.

I am relatively introverted and easy to satisfy. My desire to explore is limited to various life experiences. I was not in the opposite sex before, and I am a very loyal girl in my relationship. My husband is more caring than me, and it is he who pushed us to start an open relationship. When I was on Google, I found that in our situation, not many girls spoke up. A lot of the open relationships I've seen online have been dominated by girls who are bubbly and extroverted and love to hang out with guys themselves. But I think that in real life, there are many open relationships actively promoted by boys, and many girls don't necessarily feel good about it. So I want to write about my struggles and thoughts, as well as my dating story (some content may be banned under 18).

In the ten years we have known each other, we lost contact for half a year at the beginning of our relationship because of a different place. When he returned to Germany, we continued to fall in love. In the past ten years, there have been very few quarrels between us, and we can still love each other and think about each other. He is very proud, because after ten years of acquaintance, he can still make me laugh with his jokes.

At the end of 21, he changed his job and went to a new city three hours away from me. We can still meet every week, and I often work remotely in his city. In February this year, I signed an offer from the same city. From May onwards, the two of us can finally reunite, explore new cities and start a new life.

We were on vacation together in the Canary Islands in April and he came back two weeks early. When I was still enjoying the sun and the beach on the island, I received a message from him one day, saying that a girl he met on the dating app recently wanted to meet up on the weekend. At the same time, the girl's photo and LinkedIn information were sent. He said, this girl is easy to talk to and get along with, she should be the type I would also like.

In fact, during the few years when we lived together after marriage, R has suggested several times that we went out to each other to meet other opposite sexes because of the burnout of the existing peaceful life. Although we still have sex with a certain frequency and try different methods and ways of playing, the degree can no longer be compared with the beginning.

When I face this topic, every time I am shocked, argue, feel uncomfortable, and finally I agree with myself. The point of self-strategy will be explained in detail later on why I accept open relationships.

Even before the epidemic, he had chatted with several swinger couples in some apps. We created an account together, and there was a private folder, which required a password to access. Our private photos were placed in it, and many people gave it to us. We write messages, but mostly he's sifting and replying, and I'm getting interested. Later, due to various reasons such as work and the epidemic, there was no substantial progress. But now just because we are going to move together, this topic is once again on the table.

When I read that message on the beach, I replied him in a good mood, of course, enjoy your date. There was no disturbance. But when it came time for him to go on a date, I started to fidget, thinking about what they would say, what they would do, what chemistry they would have, what would that girl be better than me, would they replace me? . Under the uncontrollable emotions, I immediately found a body surfing coach to go surfing. At that time, I could only relax by putting myself in the limit state, facing greater fear and physical pain, and the subsequent peak of dopamine. and calm.

I was in a state of panic throughout the end of April. I didn't know what the future would hold, and I thought that the two of us would probably go astray from an open relationship and end up breaking up, nothing else.

I didn't know it at the time, but this was a magical journey for me, as if it opened the door to a new world. Not only did I experience spiritual growth within myself, but I was also emotionally full of novel experiences like wandering in Alice in Wonderland. I will write slowly later.