Dear Patient (Part 1)

Author Little Sun's Star and Heart

Chapter One

Left or right? The hospital version of going left to right?

When I was young, I had a boyfriend who was an intern. He often complained to me that when he went to the hospital for an on-site internship, when he was filling out the consultation form in the corridor, the patient said that he had a headache, but when he entered the clinic, he didn’t know why. , Stomach pain, hand pain, foot pain, and suddenly there are problems all over the body, causing him to be often accused by outpatient doctors (instructors) for poor consultation! If you can't even ask a doctor, what else would you do? !

When I heard it, I just thought it was absurd. How could such a thing happen? A headache is a headache, how could it become a stomachache in the clinic? Did you see the doctor scared and sick? I always felt that the other party was deliberately trying to make me laugh until my stomach hurts, but I didn't expect that after more than ten years, I found out for myself that what he said was true!

More than ten years later, I worked as a medical affairs counter in a small clinic, and consultation and registration became commonplace. One day, there was a phone call saying that his son accidentally knocked over the miso soup and burned his arm. I also asked him which way he did. The patient's family said that his right hand was right, and I was also very rude to report to him, "one was scalded on the right hand." It turned out that after the son himself came, he was dumbfounded. Is it the left hand?

Even if it's a phone call on behalf of a relative, it's too outrageous to not even know which hand the son burns. Is this the concept of me facing you, you facing me, and a mirror? ! Really, I can't feel my head, and I'm being looked down upon by the nursing department. Did I hear it wrong?

oops! Heaven and earth conscience! The family member was really talking about the right hand on the phone, I raised my hand and swore 300% that I heard it right! When the family members entered the clinic, they swore that they would not be less than me, but suddenly they turned into their left hands, and I was blinded when I saw them...

Clinics that help each other in medical diagnosis and treatment have suddenly turned into mutual accountability conferences. I am not a person who likes to argue and insist on my own opinions. Now that medical institutions have become half a service industry, I can’t shout that patients are lying, only For the rest of you to bow down and smirk in apology, let them say it!

I used to think that the intern boyfriend's joke about what kind of joke made me laugh and crook me, but now I just feel that I am full of grievances and can't laugh anymore... Only speechless.

Everyone went to the hospital to seek antidote for intractable diseases. I really don’t know where to get the antidote in my heart! Everyone should not want a person who sees cardiology to sit at the counter (smile).

Chapter two

Zhang Guan and Li Dai? Who has stomach pain?

The third time that the new crown vaccine is in full swing, the calls for inquiries are constantly being softened. One day, an old gentleman called and said he wanted to make an appointment.

No problem, of course. I asked him a lot of personal information, phone numbers, etc. for making an appointment.

"Do I need to be there that day?"

...I was stunned when I heard it.

"You who are talking on the phone now are the person who wants to make an appointment, right?" I think I have to make sure that it is clear.

The other party did not hesitate, "Yes, I am myself!"

Then...then if you don't come on the day of your appointment, who am I going to get the vaccine for? Hit the ghost arm? My heart is full of inexplicable, but we, as the counter staff, can't say that. I piled up a smile on my face, and my tone was so sweet and gentle, as if I was admonishing a child,

"Old gentleman! On the day of your appointment, I must be there!"

Why such a matter of course, I have to explain for a long time, is there something wrong with me or the world has changed?

The same thing, there is another one, who is also a heavenly soldier.

The husband came to help his wife get the number plate, saying that his wife had a stomachache to see a doctor. I said yes, how about your wife? The husband said that his wife was not here, so he wanted to go to the clinic and asked if he could?

"Excuse me, it's your wife who has a stomachache, right?"

I really can't stand these weird people.

The husband said that the wife was not here, and he was going to the clinic instead of the wife.

I said, "If you have a stomachache, you need to do a lot of examinations to find out the cause of the stomachache. Your wife must be present, and you can't take your place."

In fact, what I really want to say is that Zhang himself, who has abdominal pain, will not come, ah, I want to check your stomach? Is it useful for me to check your tummy?

Why do such simple and clear things need to be explained? Do these people really think it is feasible when they ask questions? Do you really think that as long as you dare to ask, you will have to answer your questions? Not only dumbfounded, but rolled his eyes to the back of his head... Only speechless.

Everyone goes to the hospital and prays for the medicine to be cured and safe. The hospital is not a hotel. You can change the sheets if you want. I hope everyone's incurable diseases will be cured as soon as possible, and don't give medical staff too many incurable diseases!

third chapter

There is a Yan Yuanyan in front of the mountain, and a Yan Yuanyan in the back of the mountain?

Recently, there are often patients who say, "I just called, you asked me to come this afternoon..." as soon as they enter the door.

Or, "I just called and you asked me to do a PCR test at 3 o'clock..."

There is also this kind of, "I'm so-and-so, come to get the vaccine, make an appointment at ten in the morning..."

Looking through the new crown appointment book, there is no name of this person at all!

Me and the others at the counter, look at me, look at you, who called this patient? And our clinic is not doing PCR tests at all?

At first, I was confused and asked all the staff at the counter, but no one admitted to taking such a call, let alone what time to make an appointment with the patient. I am really puzzled. The staff at the medical clinic and the visiting patients have their own words. The Rashomon incident happened in our small clinic in the countryside, and I, the clerk, scratched his head and puzzled for a long time.

Now that medical institutions are half a service industry, they can’t say whether it’s a patient’s fault, so they can only ask the patient in a soft voice, “What time did you call, and who answered the phone in our clinic, do you know? "

The patient remembered it very clearly, and he said a few points and points clearly, and it didn't look like he was lying at all.

As for the person who answered the phone, the patient said that he did not know the name, only that his voice sounded old. The old... There are a lot of old sisters in our family!

Looking at the phone history of the clinic, I couldn't find the caller ID of the patient at all, let alone any old man who received his call... Could it be that this is not Rashomon, but a supernatural event?

Later, the patient was asked to show us his phone history, only to find out that he had called to another clinic. That other clinic probably paid some money to put their website on the search homepage.

That clinic is the "North Qi Gastroenterology Department of Internal Medicine" in the city next door, and my home is the "North Qi Surgery Department of Gastroenterology".

It turns out that the patient was called to the Northern Qi Department of Internal Medicine, and then people came to our Northern Qi Department of Surgery. . .

This isn't Rashomon, it's an incident with a Yan Yuanyan in front of the mountain and a Yan Yuanyan in the back of the mountain.

Fortunately, the truth was found out later. At first, my subordinates were scolded by the next department. When everyone heard an old man answering the phone, the blame was all directed at my old sisters. I was not at the scene. I don’t know what happened. What's going on, I don't know how to explain it at all... I just feel helpless.

Let's look at the Internet to make phone calls in the future, and look at the address by the way! The Beiqi Clinic in the city next door is 30 minutes away by car. It's an exaggeration. The world is full of wonders!

(My dear patients...to be continued"