The Perth Diary Day 213: Incredible Humanity

Although I don't believe in religion, I have never read scriptures or the Bible, but I believe that these books can be circulated so widely. They must be the crystallization of the wisdom of many wise predecessors in the past history of life experience and truth.

But if you believe in a certain religion, you will inevitably fall into the inherent misunderstanding of this theory, so I hope to use my life to learn as much as possible. As long as my heart is strong enough, I don’t need to find another spiritual support. You can rely on your heart.

In fact, I am a person who likes to study the inner thoughts of people. It may be traced back to the lack of parental care and family status as the second son in my childhood environment. Therefore, I need to use the inner thinking and use of adults as much as possible to exchange for it. They are more caring and loving.

When I was in elementary school, I already knew that I would steal my mother's money to be a child who was not ignorant, and I knew how to show innocence and hurt in order to win sympathy and achieve my goals.

Influenced by my family of origin, I have always been accustomed to analyzing other people’s behavioral motives, which may be right or wrong, but I am rarely hurt by others’ deceit, because I am born with a strong sense of judgment and prevention.

I habitually consider people's behavioral motives from the perspective of selfishness, which is very consistent with Adler's theory of inferiority and transcendence in individual psychology.

More people's behavior motivations come from inferiority. This 'inferiority' is neutral. Whether it points to derogation or praise depends on how the actor will face his inferiority.

For example, use the method of showing off wealth to compensate for the inferiority of lack of wealth in reverse, or show your inferiority point generously without being humble, but achieve real transcendence through hard work.

It can be said that Adler's theory has brought me a solid theoretical foundation for my observations and speculations about human nature in the past few decades, and brought my understanding of human nature to the correct range, rather than just explaining all other people with selfishness behavioral motives.

That's why I had the opportunity to write more than 300 pieces of insights and sharing in the past, and the altruism inspired by me on the island from the past when I wanted to benefit myself but couldn't find the right way brought me another level of thinking, except It opened up to me the idea that altruism is self-interest, and it also allowed me to really find the right angle for me to get along with others in a social environment.

I understand that it is more to grow from self-consistency to personality independence. In addition to being able to clearly see the reflection of what I lacked in the past on others, I can also more clearly see what the motivation behind others is.

Human nature is actually interconnected, and the weaknesses of human nature are actually the same, so Adler's individual psychology has the opportunity to lay the foundation for modern psychology, and Maslow has the opportunity to summarize the five-level needs on this basis. theory.

Therefore, when you study the formation of your own personality thoroughly, and how to overcome your previous personality defects and grow into a personality charm point, you will understand the various nodes that may be encountered in this way.

When you can see through someone's heart at a certain point, you have the ability to see into the mind of others.

To acquire such an ability, you need to be infinitely frank about your own shortcomings, dig out the weakest position in your heart as much as possible, use a needle to pick it out and put it in front of everyone, and force yourself to correct it, then you will gradually gain The ability to transcend personality flaws.

As spiritual master Dzongsar Rinpoche said:

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All healing begins with the face.

When a person is extremely honest, he is invincible. If it is said that there is any way to practice, it must be true. Keep your desires and emotions true. Only from this reality can you gain transcendental strength and courage.

When a person is not mature enough to find a sense of boundary between himself and others, it will be difficult for him to understand the necessary private space he needs, and he will easily cross the boundary of other people. Whether this crossing is benign or malicious, It is not easy to maintain the normal interval between two people, until the final separation, it will be difficult to reasonably maintain a proper friendship.

When a person is not confident, if he seeks a sense of superiority to obtain happiness, in addition to being alienated by those around him who are unwilling to be suppressed, he will also actively distance himself from those whose inner energy is too strong to find superiority. A friendly friend because the way he gains confidence requires a reference, not from within himself.

A person who is not candid enough is also more difficult to deny his past, delusional to maintain his dignity and protect his own superiority by covering up, but he does not know that when others have seen through it, it is easier to gain others by bravely admitting mistakes. respect.

When a person is still very concerned about the eyes of others, he is more willing to find other objective reasons for his own shortcomings, rather than admit his own subjective problems and find a real breakthrough.

When a person is still unable to control his emotions, he is more unable to accept the truth in front of him, and he is still unable to calmly accept the dynamic changes and developments of the situation.

The weakness of human nature, there are many other manifestations, but I think that when a person gradually from a psychological infant to mature, he will face the repair of all characteristics one by one, in order to achieve the final personality independence, and find self-sufficiency in the balance of energy in a balanced life. The way.

If you want to gain the ability to see into the hearts of others, you must upgrade your method of repairing your personality from unconscious to conscious guidance, and you must also train yourself to testify to other people's various behavioral motives.

There is no perfect human being in the world, whether it is Adler who wrote about individual psychology or Russell Rolland who thoroughly studied human nature, but this imperfection is reflected in the inability to apply his own cognition to his life all the time. In all aspects, it does not hinder the study and judgment of the human nature of others.

The influence of a person's original family is very important to the initial development of a person's personality characteristics. Even if he can get rid of the influence of the original family, the influence of the original family, as the basis for him to obtain his own personality characteristics, still needs to be deeply understood. The subconscious imprint on his psyche brought by his upbringing environment.

The complexity of human nature lies in the fact that a person will deny, cover up, repeat, and truly grow and change his own personality.

But there is no doubt that the life of each of us is one of the most abundant research samples, and this sample is very special, because it has the common points of many samples, so the more thoroughly you study yourself, the more you will be. The more curious and understanding the people around you become.

The more specimens you study, the more you will desire to have a clean 'specimen' for you to study, that is, to breed a new life and yearn to see the various possibilities of this new life.