Only thoughts are free

Looking back now, how did we rush through the house inspections and the way back to the fucking house? How to pay for the goods? How did you move out of there. I also had a fight with my pig teammates on the day they moved. But the days seemed to calm down after parting with the old man.

because of mortgage pressure. I started looking for a job. Pig said, there is a Japanese food store recruiting people. Why don't you try it. The lady boss is a Korean. Speak Korean English. The bosses are relatively friendly. In this way, I entered the back kitchen of this Japanese food store. I told my sister-in-law and cousin about this, and they were all very excited. Hey, they are in the halo of handsome Korean dramas. I don't feel that way.

The Japanese food stores here are said to be opened by Koreans. For example, beauty and nail salons are all run by Vietnamese. Those who go abroad are either the elites or the bottomless like me. Although I only work six hours a day, my hands and feet have not stopped since the moment I started to work. There wasn't even time to eat. Eventually, after a month, my broken legs couldn't stand the toss. No matter what the mind wants to do, the body does not obey. It is a sadness. Obviously past that kind of full-body age, but still doing that kind of initial hard work. There is unwillingness and loss, even more helpless. The road home was rough and long. When you quit your job, it's a brief relief. What followed was endless pain.

Pig said every day that he was like a contract worker, and that he was no longer his own from the moment he opened his eyes. Keep stepping on the accelerator to deliver food and loans. I started to follow him for three meals at irregular times, sometimes having dinner in the middle of the night. My stomach turned red again. My stomach was already weak and I started to churn, and my breath became more and more unpleasant. When a person reaches middle age, he is exhausted, his child is still young and his abilities are limited, and I feel powerless.

Long for these, he began to attribute his own fault to his old mother. Obviously, he could live without such a hardship, but at this moment, the child suffered again. My mother-in-law sometimes sends messages, videos, etc. in a disgusting manner, hoping to chat with her granddaughter. And I don't want to talk to her any more. Because she is indeed an extremely selfish person, and what she says is very contrary to her heart, she is only herself, she is happy, doesn't care about others, has no concept of family, and only has money in her eyes, she is extremely stingy and a proper miser.

The days go on, and I often feel that the meaning of living is really unclear. One day, I dreamed that I had returned to my home in Shanghai. Coincidentally, my cousin told me that she dreamed that I was going back to Shanghai. She went to the airport to pick me up, but she couldn’t pick me up. The airport was like a maze, she only knew that I was there, but she couldn’t find it. So woke up. Some people may have never experienced leaving friends and relatives. That is because no matter how far you go, you are always in the same country, and because of this epidemic in different countries, there is more than one Pacific Ocean in the middle. The epidemic is a wall, and those The artificial barrier makes me hate it even more, why didn't God see all this?

One of the classmates who studied together was a man. He said that plane tickets could not be bought, so he came to fill the time with learning English to enrich himself. And I don't have any other beliefs except learning English. There is a case where the front desk refused to take a Chinese child to see a doctor because her English was not good. I remember when I first arrived here, I was unable to refute the behavior of the Mexican-American female teacher who belittled China. I hate myself for being an English mute. I have always admitted that I am a poor person. But that won't erase my Chinese heart. I hate those Communist Party officials who don't do anything, but I believe that there are still upright Communists, but they have a rougher road. The China I hate is the group of Chinese who pretend to be good for the people but actually trample on the people. The way home is a long way off.

I have lived for most of my life, I have experienced too much, and now there are still dark clouds, this is the world.