calm and restless

Shortly after returning from Beihai, the old man made a phone call before teammate Zhu left Shanghai. The whole family was driving outside that day. Pig turned on the speakerphone, and originally thought that the old man couldn't say a few words, maybe it was a greeting or something. As a result, he was reminding pigs to beware of me and to carry any valuables with them. He hurriedly turned off his phone handsfree. And then hung up the phone after a few words.

I wasn't angry at the time. bear with it.

As my cousin said, he's leaving, so stop arguing. For a long time, my patience, from a hot-tempered desperate three-girl, to the current one, has really changed in quality.

Later, he got on a plane to Los Angeles. I feel joy in my heart.

Life has returned to the beginning of my daughter and I. Although I usually go out early and return late, when I get up from the warm bed in winter, I will pull the sleeping child up from sleep. Repeat every day, but my heart is still at peace. Occasionally, on weekends, I will meet my son, and bring my niece and sister-in-law to go out for food and drink. Or meet up with a few colleagues for a dinner party. Be energetic with young people and chat with seniors about life. Looking at my classmates' WeChat Moments, they are basking in the beautiful scenery and showing their affection. I just told myself that my life may always be lonely.

The days went by faster than expected. In this way, day by day, the child grows up in my company. Life is more difficult for women. It is more important to have a good job and a good income than to find a man to marry. So in a very difficult epidemic period, when I received the immigrant visa, my heart was broken. Others may not understand. And I know that the road ahead will be difficult.

I didn't tell my parents right away, I called a better colleague of mine. I was crying on the phone. I said, "Old Zhang, I'm really confused, but everyone says that America is good, and I don't want to delay my children. But I really don't want to leave Shanghai and leave my own job." She understood me very well, she said: "Take it as a trip, and come back if it's not good."

My parents later found out that we were leaving, and my dad told me to take a family photo. I laughed and said, why are you filming this, he said, after you leave, I don’t know when you will be able to come back in this epidemic. ""No, it's not like it used to be now. "Actually, I know it in my heart. The road ahead is dark. My mother said, "Your mother-in-law has a very strange temper, so don't fight if you live together. "I know that my parents have also made great psychological preparations. It's hard to convince myself. My mother said stubbornly: "With children around, there is no future, and it is only necessary to fly high and far." "

Before I could take it easy, it was a very rushed week, because the flight was canceled, and we stayed for another week. It's summer vacation, and many people don't know that it's been a struggling two weeks. In the early hours of that Tuesday morning, the set alarm clock went off. My parents got up before me. The lights upstairs and downstairs were on. My dad said, "Is there nothing left?" I said, "No. Just a suitcase." I pretended not to care. I said, "I'll be back soon."

When the shuttle driver arrived, he helped me put the suitcase in the trunk, and then we got into the car. My mother said: "Pay attention to safety on the road, and give us a message when we arrive." My daughter burst into tears. I don't look at the faces of my parents who turned their backs. I know, there are silent tears hanging on it. Growing up, I've never been that far from them. The car drove all the way to Pudong Airport, and it started to rain. The scratches on the car window, one by one in my heart. At that moment, my tears couldn't hold back...

If you fly away immediately, perhaps, there will not be too much free time to count the sadness of parting, and the originally scheduled flight after seven o'clock is still delayed. During the long wait of more than three hours, my parents and I experienced this pain again on the phone. My cousin said, how can you still fly in such heavy rain. What she meant in her words wanted the flight to be cancelled again. Why don't I think so? Give me one more week, one month, one year, no, two years, five years. I don't want to leave.

The plane transited from Shanghai to Shenzhen, and it was check-in again, checked luggage, and waited. But I know that I am still in China. Still like at home. At this moment, I can feel the hearts of those who want to go home during the Spring Festival. When a person is alive, the happiness in front of his parents is known only to himself. The pig teammates couldn't understand it, because he felt like he had no home since he was a child.