Why You Don't Get Along With Yourself: Pleasure

we all need courage

When it comes to psychological inspirational books, you must have "read" this hated courage even if you haven't read it. I remember that I saw this book in a bookstore in 2015. Now it's 2021. This blue book is still there. Lying in a brick-and-mortar bookstore, and still in the most conspicuous place, makes me wonder... Do these people have no other books to buy? But this also reflects how much people care about being "hated" these days. , not so much the courage to be hated as the courage to "don't please others". We all know that since we live in this world, getting along with other people is an inevitable thing, unless you can leave everything, including your comfortable life, your family and friends, and your mobile phone, and go out into the wild alone. Self-sufficiency, find clean water by yourself, go pick fruit or hunt for food, build your own house, make your own warm clothes for winter, chop wood and fire by yourself, put on your own sideshows for yourself...well...before finishing these, I think I need a book of "The Courage to Live Alone in the Wild", eh? Don't have this book? Well.. Since you and I don't have the courage to live alone in the wild, it is bound to learn how to "please".

Please, is it really bad?

To please others is a bit like a means of survival, especially when living in the harem. If you don't have some fame, then at least you have to cling to some high-status empresses or even the emperor himself, in order to survive in this sinister environment! ! However, you can live well without relying on others. There are many people like this, and this is not a palace drama. Let's go back to modern times (hey), now is not the era of the weak, as long as there is a heart, everyone can do it. To survive, we don't need to please others to keep our own head at all, and ingratiating becomes a means of "getting something", and usually what we want to get is "approval", which we get by pleasing others. Agreed, I don't think there's anything wrong with this, but if you're unhappy about it, you may need to switch tactics.

happy to please

Since we want to please to gain recognition, the best person should be the one with whom we have the most frequent contact. I know that if we can get the affirmation of some people, such as our idol, etc., it will be very happy, but a year It only takes 365 days to affirm you once or twice. Once you are happy for a week, it is useless. I think this person is the best, the best, the best is to be with you 24 hours a day. You can eat, go to the toilet, sleep with you, and even grow up with you. very similar! Yes, this person is you. You please this guy, you don't have to try to guess what he's thinking, you know right away if he likes your opinion, he won't leave you even if he doesn't, and even if he may disagree with you at first , but with your efforts, he can also see your changes, gradually accept you and agree with you, your self-confidence will gradually increase, and this process does not need to consider anyone's face! Seriously, who likes Being hated, isn't it better to please yourself?

Your existence is a beauty in itself, and you deserve to be loved, affirmed, and appreciated.

I'm He Pu, see you next week~