貝星人
貝星人

闢一塊心田,自個兒筆耕。嗜好太多,時間太少。想隨心所欲,亦隨波逐流。主修心理學,NLP高級執行師、註冊催眠治療師。愛動物、愛寫作、愛學外語,重複學習、忘記、再學習。不擅長運動,相信 Thoughts Are Things,2019 年參加大阪初馬,因為堅持,所以完成。2021 年由香港出走到英國,開展人生下半場大冒險。

i'm not on facebook but i'm not dead

Since when did social media replace the physical me?

Run away from home for two months, and keep on phone or video call with Mommy once a week. She mentioned that my friend told her that I was unhappy in the UK, and that there was no news from me, so she was a little worried about me.

I am amazed.

Me: "I contact her every day, and we exchange news every day in the group, how come there is no news from me?"
Mommy: "She didn't say you posted on Facebook."

 

Since when did social media replace me?

Important: Don't let my dear beautiful mommy worry about me!


long gone from facebook

I'm not (actively) on Facebook, but I'm not dead yet.

Since I started posting on Medium a year ago, I have drastically reduced the number of posts and views on Facebook, so sometimes I'm behind the world and don't necessarily know what's going on in "netizens" these days.

In fact, reducing my activity on Facebook didn't cost me much in life. My friends will still have a way to know my current situation, and I will also care and greet the people I care about, but not "openly" to follow and be followed.

"Excessive" publicity is one of the reasons I'm most resistant to Facebook.

For example, a hundred lines of happy birthday, after I leave a message, I don’t know whether the other party remembers or notices my blessing, and vice versa, when there are many people who I am not sure who leave a message to wish me, there will be a question mark in my heart: Are they really? care about me? (My suspicious troublesome woman)

Facebook is crowded and mixed, and some of my innermost thoughts are too blatant to write openly. I don’t want to hold a press conference to share my innermost thoughts with everyone I know or don’t know.

As for the innocuous sharing, it seems to be optional. Most of the time, it is punching, flashing, and recording that I am still alive, but it has no practical significance.

As for writing, I don’t know why, writing on Facebook is always a bit pretentious or pretentious. Obviously everyone is just punching their cards. What kind of text do you write? ! I've always felt that Facebook is not the home of long essays.

In addition, the quality of the so-called "friends" on "netizens" or friend lists varies, and many of the comments are unresponsive or obscure, and I am too lazy to screen every article before publishing it.

Over time, I just punched a card from time to time to let everyone know that I was okay, there was food, there was running, there was sunny weather, there was rain and snow... But this kind of interaction with little nutrition gradually made me lack motivation. this way.

Over time, less and less foot hair is left on Facebook. So, some people say that there is no news from me.

Now, every now and then I hit a card, and every now and then I take a look. Post less, read less, too much content that is too nutritious, most of them are used as a look at the current situation of friends, but they are mainly flashing to report good news and not bad news, and it is not a big problem to read a little less.


Why can't MeWe play?

I'm too inactive on social platforms, and I'm not sure if MeWe can't play, but at least I haven't posted and browsed there for a long time.

On that day, everyone was talking about giving up Facebook and "immigrating" to MeWe. However, even though most of my friends opened MeWe, they still used Facebook as the main platform for sharing. No friends have seen the sharing on MeWe. It is like a dead place where no one flows. I have given up.

Why can't MeWe play? Did you play MeWe?


Moving to Signal is a success

As for the "immigration" from WhatsApp to Signal, there is a small success. Many friends have transferred their positions to Signal, and 90% of my text messages are conducted in Signal.

But my friends also said that it is difficult to give up WhatsApp completely, especially at the work level, which I can understand, and I have not completely avoided WhatsApp and WeChat.


I have no feelings for Clubhouse

As for Clubhouse, which was very popular a while ago and requires an invitation to join, I didn't feel it from beginning to end, and even deleted the APP.

Are you all playing?


Even IG is lazy to post it

Think social platform writing is too naked?

Is it okay to post photos on IG without writing? Adding a Hashtag can also install pseudo-wenqing.

Yes yes yes.

However, I don't even bother to post on IG.

It's like putting a card on a Facebook post to show that I'm still alive, but I don't have much feeling for the pie heart that has no nutrients and no content.

In fact, now no matter whether Facebook or IG is posting photos, I just do it once in my spare time. After punching in the card, I just put a photo into the album, and I don't ask for attention.


Humans want attention?

I heard that some people will post three, four, five, six or seven times a day, and share all the big and small things in their lives on social platforms, just like "sharing obsessive-compulsive disorder".

It's no surprise that people always want attention in the majority.

However, sometimes I also think that if I pursue too much attention on online platforms, it may become a pathological condition. I just blindly shape my own life, attitude, taste, etc. on social platforms. I feel good about myself, but not necessarily The real self, those with severe "illness", or even one or two less likes and messages, feel that they have been forgotten, and then feel anxious and depressed, worry about some empty data, or even ignore real life and relationships .

Oh no, Internet Addiction/Social Media Addiction!


Addiction

The title of my Final Year Paper in college was Internet Addiction. While writing my thesis, I asked the professor for help worriedly:

"I think I have Internet Addiction!"

After he got to know me, he said that the problem was not as serious as I thought.

But in fact, I'm not exaggerating. At that time, it was indeed inseparable from the computer and the Internet.

During that time, the first thing I did when I got home was to turn on the computer - ICQ (in ancient times);

There are also games around the clock - "Three Kingdoms", "The Age of Navigation", "Simulation", "Pretty Girl's DreamWorks"... There are also hospitals, restaurants, convenience stores and so on.

I still remember my uncle making a long-distance call to tell me to persuade Tang Xiu not to play the phone. I said it was a bit difficult, because I would play the phone until late at night and didn't want to sleep.

Turning off the lights at home every night, playing video games in the dark or ICQ with friends is my world, and when I really can't keep my eyes open or when Mommy orders me to turn off the computer, I don't want to.

If the computer is broken and the network cannot be connected, it is even more maddening.

Obviously addicted.

In fact, from then on, I felt that I was an addictive person, so I was especially careful not to get too addicted to anything, or try to avoid it, so I didn't gamble, and I didn't dare to play Candy Crush.

To this day, I still play video games, sometimes pay class fees, and sometimes I still don’t want to sleep. Of course, keeping the phone and texting is one of my habits.

I can stay away from Facebook and IG, but I won't give up IM communication, especially now that I'm in a foreign land, and all my connections with relatives and friends are there.


i like real

However, given the choice, I prefer real communication.

How long has it been since you tried to dump the phone and "talk on the phone"?

Compared with using SMS Chat, you can hear the voice line, the tone of voice, the mood, the laughter or the cry on the phone. If two people can "cook porridge", the relationship is probably not bad, and there will be fewer misunderstandings in the communication on the phone, and the communication will be more real and accurate.

But meeting each other is better than talking on the phone. You can also feel the other person's body temperature with their expressions, eyes, smiles, and these are not given by text messages or phone calls.

However, when I can't meet with most of my friends, I can only communicate with friends through video, phone calls, text messages, but more or less posts on social platforms can't replace me! Even if I disappear from Facebook one day, it's not necessarily because I'm dead, it may just be that I'm tired of it. In that world of endless messages, no matter how much I follow, I can't finish it; It's a little annoying, and sometimes I want to be quieter and simpler.

Anyway, I'm still alive, it's okay.

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